Undrafted Free Agent

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2009-06-09T20:16:00.000-07:00

I'm going to be posting here starting today:

http://blog.seattlepi.com/undraftedfreeagent/

If you like what you've been reading here, please continue to visit that new address and bump up my numbers. Let's see if we can make me into a real writer...

Heaps

2009-06-07T15:44:00.000-07:00

Everyone, please settle down.

We see this story almost every year.

A great example of this is Chris Leak. Here was a guy who did everything he was supposed to do in high school and was highly recruited by everyone, but I wondered then, “What’s the big deal? He’s 6’0 tall. The NFL will never give him a chance. No matter how ‘good’ he is.” As it turned out, he won a national title with Florida, but that was after being a pretty big disappointment under Ron Zook and he really won that title because of Florida’s offense under Urban Meyer, and their suffocating defense and overall team speed. Oh, and Tebow did a lot of damage as a true freshman that year. Heaps has similar hype as Jimmy Clausen (incomplete, although a disappointment thus far) and Chris Leak (won a title, but will not be remembered for that).

Clausen was the golden boy of all golden boys. He was heralded as the messiah. He had tremendous success in high school and even before then he was being tutored by Steve Clarkston. People were making ridiculous claims like Clausen could start for several college programs as a 13-year-old kid, a claim even Clarkston called ridiculous. But that didn’t stop the fawning. Clausen was a boy wonder. He would immediately lead whatever team he joined and become a surefire No. 1 draft pick in the NFL. I’m not sure what the rush is. Why is it necessary to hype a kid when he hasn’t done anything yet? There are scores of kids who were alpha dogs in high school who end up flaming out in college or guys that were superhuman in college who turn out to be nothings in the NFL. It’s a weird phenomenon. Aren’t there enough guys who are actually doing something right now in their leagues that warrant the hype? I understand that an unknown quantity is sometimes more appealing than the known, but that’s mostly because you’ve had a chance to see what you’ve got and pick apart the flaws. With the unknown, all you’ve heard about is how great this kid is, and since you haven’t had a chance to see the kid perform yourself, you take their word for it.

He must be great. Scout.com says so!

Rivals.com has him ranked No. 1 in the Country!

Settle down, please. He’s only a name. You know nothing about him. Unless you have followed a kid’s career to the point of watching all of his games, then there is no way you have any idea if he’s good or not. You only know what other people tell you. It’s ridiculous to get overly excited or overly bummed regarding a recruit. Recruiting matters, but leave that to the guys who actually do the recruiting. We have no idea how much they want a kid or not because, for one, they aren’t allowed to talk about it.

Clausen hasn’t done a thing at Notre Dame that puts him anywhere near the hype that he was generating. I remember reading about him and wondering why he was so hyped up, because he looked undersized. I suppose in college a guy can be successful despite his size, but isn’t this just about getting to the NFL? That’s how I evaluate these guys, and by “evaluate” I mean, watch them through a somewhat educated layperson’s lens. The NFL is not kind to small QBs, it never has been and I doubt it ever will be. Drew Brees is an exception, and a notable one, because he’s been overwhelmingly successful. However, there are so few guys that size who actually get a chance to play or even make a roster. The NFL looks at production in college, but when it comes to QBs, they really, really, really focus on potential. If a QB is considered too small, then these guys have got their minds made up no matter how insane the QB’s stats were in college. Look no further than Graham Harrell. No QB was anywhere near him from a production standpoint over his career, but he went undrafted and probably won’t make any team. That’s the NFL. It’s cruel. But no matter how polished a guy is, if he doesn’t have the physical makeup, it’s usually time to head up to Canada.

I’m very confused as to why these recruiting services continually list these undersized QBs as the top QBs in the country. Is it because they put up great stats? And what about these other QBs who actually have, or project to have, NFL size? Where are they in these rankings? If they are low, why are they so low? Are they always late bloomers? I’m confused by the whole thing.

I know that UW fans are likely crushed by the whole Heaps-going-to-BYU thing, but honestly how much of that is tied to his actual ability? I’m assuming he’s a great high school player, based on what scouting services and Hugh Millen tell me. They ought to know since they’ve seen this guy play and I’ve only seen him play one game (last year’s state title game). He looked very good to me, but like so many others before him, he also looked small. I would have been happy if he signed with UW, but only because of what it means for the whole UW program from a stature perspective, not from an actual production perspective. It seems to me that if people are disappointed that Heaps is not going to play at UW, it’s because he’s a local guy, he’s been hyped up nationally, and UW didn’t get him. I’m bummed about it too, but for perception reasons only.

Even if he is such a highly ranked QB, I’m actually a little relieved that he’s not going to UW. I’m sure he’s as “great” of a kid as everyone says he is, but it sure seems that he (and more likely his family) lacks any true humility. How else do you explain his family hiring a PR firm to handle his announcement? How else do you explain sending a press release announcing that he’ll make his decision the next day? How else do you explain flying to Provo, Utah to make the announcement? And another thing, I’m baffled as to why a player “announcing” where he’s going to school is an event in the first place. Aside from attention (for the player, player’s family, and the school) is there any other reason to do it? I don’t hate the players for doing it, but that doesn’t mean I like it. It’s uncomfortable. Essentially the whole system is in place so that the kid can be lauded and applauded. How strange and empty is that? So I’m relieved he’s not going to UW because he may be talented and poised, he may be a little too poised for my liking. He seems a bit entitled to me and kids like that don’t necessarily turn out to be the best fighters when faced with adversity.

Another reason that I’m relieved that he’s not going to UW is that he may have maxed out already. He’s been coached for so long, does he really have that much more to improve on? Perhaps the reason we’ve seen these scouting services hype players like Heaps is because he is technically better than his peers because he’s had the benefit of great coaching. From what I’ve read, Heaps has been driving to a special QB coach in Oregon for years now, almost every weekend. Obviously he’s going to have a much better understanding of throwing mechanics and reading defenses than some kid who has bad coaching, is less affluent than Heaps’s family, and has less involved parents than Heaps. So, for all we know, Heaps, while very skilled and talented, may have reached his peak. He may not get any better because he’s so prepped now. This other kid may have more talent than Heaps, may have more size than Heaps, and may deal with adversity better because he’s been put in more challenging situations than Heaps, but just hasn’t had the opportunity yet. That opportunity may present itself in college or even later in the NFL.

I only know what I’ve read about Heaps, so I have no insights into his true character. For all I know, he may turn out to be Joe Montana. But I do know that when a kid is given everything he wants so early in life, the end result is not always pretty, in sports or elsewhere.

Take a look at this list of names and you’d do well to calm down about not getting the highest ranked QB:

2002 Rivals.com 5 star QBs
Ben Olson (BYU, then UCLA)
Trent Edwards (Stanford)
Vince Young (Texas)
Marcus Vick (Virginia Tech)
Andy Goodenough (ASU)
James Banks (Tennessee)

2003 Rivals.com 5 star QBs
Kyle Wright (Miami)
(notables: Chris Leak, 4 stars; Jamarcus Russell, 4 stars; Brady Quinn, 4 stars; Matt Ryan 3 stars)

2004 Rivals.com 5-star QBs
Rhett Bomar (Oklahoma)
Anthony Morelli (Penn St)
Chad Henne (Michigan)
Xavier Lee (Florida St)
Matt Tuiasosopo (Washington – chose baseball)
Robert Johnson (Texas Tech)

2005 Rivals.com 5-star QBs
Mark Sanchez (USC)
Ryan Perrilloux (LSU)

2006 Rivals.com 5-star QBs
Matthew Stafford (Georgia)
Mitch Mustain (USC)
Tim Tebow (Florida)
Brent Schaeffer (Ole Miss)

2007 Rivals.com 5-star QBs
Jimmy Clausen (Notre Dame)
Ryan Mallett (Michigan)
Tyrod Taylor (Virginia Tech)
Cameron Newton (Florida)

2008 Rivals.com 5-star QBs
Blaine Gabbert (Missouri)
Dayne Crist (Notre Dame)
Terrelle Pryor (Ohio St)

2009 Rivals.com 5-star QBs
Matt Barkley (USC)
Garrett Gilbert (Texas)
Russell Shephard (LSU)

2010 Rivals 5-star QBs
None (Jake Heaps is a 4-star QB)

Cleveland

2009-06-02T12:41:00.000-07:00

I got sucked in.

I thought that the Cleveland team that ran through the regular season and through the first two rounds of the playoffs was legit. Since I didn’t watch Cleveland closely during the year or even during those first two rounds, I didn’t realize that “LeBron at the top of the key, forcing shots” was a play. It’s pretty clear that LeBron is a 7 or 8 on a scale of 1-10 as a one-on-one (or one-on-three) player. But he’s a 10 when the ball and his teammates are moving. He’s fabulous off of the ball because he’s quick and smart and can get open for easy shots, either on the floor or in the air for ridiculous alley-oops. He’s superhuman at finding other guys open for easy shots. But he’s bad or merely mortal when he freezes at the top of the key while his teammates space the floor and stare at him. It doesn’t work. It didn’t work all series against Orlando and will never work long term. It’s terrible. It’s also aesthetically awful. I love basketball and I absolutely hate seeing this “we don’t trust anyone to do anything except LeBron play” being run. It’s ugly, it’s awful, it’s selfish, and it’s probably the number one reason why non-NBA fans say that they hate the NBA. If that’s all the NBA was, I’d hate it too, but it’s not.

I simply don’t understand why the Cavs would purposefully eliminate their best asset and make LeBron into a one-man team when he’s best at creating. The only good thing that can happen is he makes that awful step-back 22 footer. If he does actually drive to the hole out of this set, maybe he’ll get fouled or maybe he’ll get a layin, but those take effort (which explains why he rarely does it late in games). Also, how easy is that to defend? The other players can simply box out or help on LeBron. It’s much easier to guard someone if they’re just standing and watching, but it’s not easy to guard someone who is moving without the ball expecting a pass if they’re open. I hope they realize that they are wasting LeBron’s true gifts and knock it off next year. Also, since he’s a smart player, he must realize this too. Hopefully he realizes that it doesn’t work and waves the play off when it comes in and just does his thing. What is Mike Brown going to do? Bench him?

All that being said, his teammates were absolutely terrible in this series. I’ve ranted too much about this already. I picked Cleveland to win simply because of LeBron. This is a 30-win team without him.

Contrast that to Orlando, where Jameer Nelson, arguably Orlando’s best player during the year, gets hurt and Orlando is in the finals. If Hedo Turkoglu goes down, then Pietrus would step in and they wouldn’t miss a beat, same for Rashard Lewis. If Howard goes down, then Gortat would step in, no worries. I should have known better. Even though LeBron was wonderful this series, he needed role players to step up. Jordan, for as awesome and dominant as he was, always had someone on his team hit big shots in big moments. LeBron did not have that this series and it’s a shame. Also, as for next year, how do they get over the hump with these four guys taking up space and not doing much of anything to help the team win?

Zydrunas Ilgauskas – signed through next year, making over $10M (he grabs a stray rebound here and there and hits the occasional 20-foot shot, but is virtually no threat and no force defensively, he’s essentially worthless out there for the low, low price of $10M!)
Anderson Varejao – signed through next year (player option for this year), making around $6M (I hate him, but I guess he’s not that expensive)
Sasha Pavlovic – signed through next year, making around $5M (he was used in a strange way this series, and wasn’t effective)
Ben Wallace – signed through next year, making over $14M (I’ve heard rumblings that he will retire. If he does so, when he’s owed over $14M next year, then I’d be more surprised at that than if my dog, Sully, started talking to me about the weather and that he likes cheese more than sausages).

That’s $35M set aside for next year for guys who give Cleveland no shot at winning. As much as I hate Varejao as a player, he does bring some things (rebounding and annoyance) that may lead to wins, but he’s a zero offensively and that’s where the Cavs had their biggest issues… aside from being completely unable to contend three-point shooting, which is interesting for such a “good” defensive team. Maybe they’re just good until they play a team that can actually shoot and isn’t the least bit afraid to do so.

Now L.A. has role players who have stepped up in the past, in fact recently, so I can certainly see them winning this series. From an athletic standpoint, it seems like the two teams match up well. Odom should be able to defend Lewis better than anyone Cleveland threw at him (with the exception of LeBron for very limited minutes), of course, Gasol starts and will get run ragged by Lewis until Phil makes a change to Odom. Ariza should be able to guard Turkoglu. Kobe will probably match up with Lee/Pietrus. Fisher will attempt to guard Alston (or Nelson, if he plays), who is quicker, but not that dangerous. Bynum/Gasol will match up with Howard/Gortat.

I like Orlando’s chances and I actually trust them a bit more than I trust L.A. because they are super talented and can really shoot the rock, and they are also playing fearlessly. But I can’t shake the matchup problems. Cleveland was either too small (West and Williams) or too slow (Z and Varejao) to contend with Orlando. L.A. does not have that problem.

I originally thought that Orlando was going to win in six, but now I’ve changed course, simply because I looked a little closer. LA wins in six.

On LeBron’s Exit
Here’s what I’ve heard:

he should have been gracious in defeat
he should have walked over to Dwight Howard and wished him well in the next series
he should have addressed the media and answered questions about the series and about his future in Cleveland and the state of the franchise around him
when he spoke a couple of days after the series ended, we wanted him to say that he was remorseful for not doing what we wanted him to do in the first place
I’ve heard that even the greats walked over and said good luck and that it’s just part of the game

Look, I’m a fan of good sportsmanship too. I would have liked him to respect the game and his opponents. I don’t know exactly what that means, but an overt handshake and a look saying “you beat me this time, but you won’t next time” or something like that would have been fine. But here’s the thing: I do not like contrived graciousness. I don’t like contrived anything for that matter, but if LeBron was so upset that he lost and couldn’t deal with the situation, why be phony? He acted how he acted. He owes nothing to anyone. I don’t understand how “saying the right things” means that he’s a better person when, in effect, he would have been lying to us. His non-verbal gesture said more than any verbal statement could have. He let us know exactly how he feels.

He’s pissed.

He’s pissed he lost.

He’s pissed his teammates pissed down their legs.

He’s pissed that he has a coach who can think of no better gameplan than “LeBron, you bail us out.”

He’s pissed that he’s missed another opportunity to mark his greatness by winning a title.

He’s pissed that he played as well as he could play and came up short.

He’s pissed.

I like that certainty.

I dislike being lied to.

He would have had to suppress his true feelings if he went through some b.s. press conference lauding the Orlando Magic. He would have had to lie to our faces if he said that his team is not to blame for the losses. He would have danced around the subject of 2010 even though he probably knows what he’s going to do (nice touch wearing the Yankee cap when he finally did talk though). I respect what he did. LeBron is no dummy. He knows exactly what his actions meant. He didn’t have to call Danny Ferry and idiot for putting that squad out on the floor with him.

It doesn’t matter to me whether he stays in Cleveland or goes elsewhere, but I do want him to be put in a situation where he has the right complementary players and the right coach who knows how to deal with championship caliber teams. It doesn’t look like Mike Brown has it. Sadly, the one guy that does is in L.A. where he’ll likely nab his 10th ring.

I've Figured Out Shaq and Kobe

2009-05-29T12:48:00.000-07:00

When I’m watching these playoff games on DVR, I often fast forward through all of the pre-game, commercials, some free throws, and halftime commentary. But I always stop to watch the LeBron/Kobe puppet commercials—by the way, why didn’t they get Kobe and LeBron to do the voices? Or did they and they just don’t sound like themselves at all? And I love the slow-mo “Where Amazing Happens” commercials. Since they are showing those in slow-mo, I was able to notice something that I hadn’t seen before during the Kobe-to-Shaq alley oop over Portland. It is an iconic play, obviously, or it wouldn’t be a part of this ad campaign. But it’s iconic not only for the play itself, but also for what seems to be a microcosm of Kobe and Shaq’s relationship, of which there are 7 elements:

Both were otherworldly talented
Both played big in big games and big moments
Both needed each other to make big plays and win
Both benefited greatly from having the other on the floor
Shaq needs to be the center of attention
Kobe wanted Shaq to love him and appreciate his greatness
Shaq never gave Kobe his love and appreciation sincerely

Anyone who even passively watched these two play together would agree with numbers 1-4 without too much argument. I had my thoughts about numbers 5-7, but after watching this 30-second clip, I feel like I have my proof. After Shaq dunked, watch what happens as he runs back up the floor. He makes the O face with the huge googley eyes. He screams and points to the crowd. His crowd. He never takes his eyes off his adoring masses. You will see Kobe extend his hand for a high five, even pathetically slapping Shaq’s wrist as Shaq races past him—ignoring him completely. Shaq is too busy reveling in his greatness to extend his hand to the teammate who tossed him a perfect pass which enabled him to make the play that everyone adored him for. This one play, this one sequence, sums up their entire relationship. Great play, by two great players, who never could last long-term because they both need to be loved at the expense of all others.

Weak Draft

2009-05-28T18:33:00.000-07:00

I’ve been reading how weak this draft is relative to others, which I thought was interesting because it seems like there are some really quality players who are draft eligible this year. I decided to take a look at the first rounds of the past 9 drafts (2007-1999… I didn’t look at 2008 because it’s too soon, although 2007 probably is also) to put in perspective just how “weak” this current draft class is relative to the last 9 years.

1999: 8 All-Stars out of 29 picks (All-NBA players from this draft: Elton Brand, Baron Davis, Shawn Marion, Ron Artest)
2000: 1 All-Star out of 29 picks (All-NBA players from this draft: None)
2001: 3 All-Stars out of 28 picks (All-NBA players from this draft: Pau Gasol, Tony Parker)
2002: 3 All-Stars out of 28 picks (All-NBA players from this draft: Yao Ming, Amare Stoudemire)
2003: 6 All-Stars out of 29 picks (All-NBA players from this draft: LeBron James, Carmelo Anthony, Chris Bosh, Dwyane Wade)
2004: 3 All-Stars out of 29 picks (All-NBA players from this draft: Dwight Howard)
2005: 3 All-Stars out of 30 picks (All-NBA players from this draft: Deron Williams, Chris Paul)
2006: 1 All-Star out of 30 picks (All-NBA players from this draft: Brandon Roy)
2007: 0 All-Stars out of 30 picks (All-NBA players from this draft: None)

Now let’s take a look at some of the names routinely mentioned as first round picks and see where this perceived “weakness” emanates.

Blake Griffin – considered by many (not me) as the no-brainer, best player in the draft.
Ricky Rubio – widely thought to be a fantastic NBA point guard despite slight build and shaky shooting. He’d also be a top 5 pick in any draft the past 10 years.
Hasheem Thabeet – mock drafts have had him ranked high for years. While I believe that he has several shortcomings, would he have ever been considered anything other than a top 10 pick in the last 10 years? Before you answer, take a look at some of these names, all of whom were indeed top 10 picks in the last 10 years: Danillo Gallinari, ’08; Joe Alexander, ’08; Yi Jianlian, ’07; Brandan Wright, ’07; Adam Morrison, ’06; Shelden Williams, ’06; Patrick O’Bryant, ’06; Mohammed Saer Sene, ’06; Martell Webster, ’05; Channing Frye, ’05; Ike Diogu, ’05; Shuan Livingston, ’04; Rafael Araujo, ’04; Luke Jackson, ’04; Darko Milicic, ’03; Mike Sweetney, ’03; Jay Williams, ’02; Mike Dunleavy, ’02; Nikoloz Tskitishvili, ’02; Dajuan Wagner, ’02; Kwame Brown, ’01; Eddy Curry, ’01; Eddie Griffin, ’01; DeSagana Diop, ’01; Rodney White, ’01; Stromile Swift, ’00; Darius Miles, ’00; Marcus Fizer, ’00; DeMarr Johnson, ’00; Chris Mihm, ’00; Jonathan Bender, ’99. That’s what I thought. The answer is no.
Jrue Holiday – Here is where I’ve seen the rumblings that the draft begins to get weak. Holiday is an intriguing player who has high value because he can play PG and good defense. I don’t understand the weak commentary.
Jordan Hill – I like his toughness and size, he has a ceiling to be a Nene-type of player, but he could also bust.
James Harden – I dislike his game. I see him as a definite bust candidate.
Brandon Jennings – I have no idea and neither does anyone else.
Stephen Curry – I love this guy, but he has huge bust potential because he’s so frail and not quick. He definitely could be a better Mike Bibby though.
Tyreke Evans – Not a fan, but he’s got moxie. I don’t see him busting.
Jonny Flynn – nice player who will definitely get a chance because of his speed and strength at his position
DeJuan Blair – he’ll do really well because there are so many finesse big guys in the league and he can push them around.
DeMar DeRozan – one of my favorites in the draft. He’s got something going on.
Jeff Teague – If Wake Forest didn’t get trounced early in the tournament, I might have an opinion on him, but I don’t.
Earl Clark – I don’t like him and see huge bust possibilities. He’s physically extraordinarily talented, but if there are effort concerns about him in college, why wouldn’t he have them once he’s paid? Haven’t we seen this story before? Also, I’m not convinced that he knows what he’s doing on the floor.
James Johnson – see Jeff Teague
Gerald Henderson – role player at best. I don't see it in him.
Eric Maynor – I like him a lot. I see a lot of Andre Miller in him without the ‘tude.
B.J. Mullens – I’ve got four words for you: B. U. S. T. Come on, there’s no chance he plays meaningful minutes ever, right?
Ty Lawson – I like Ty, for the same reasons I like Flynn, only Lawson has a better shot (I’d call it a jumper, but it’s really a set shot)
Tyler Hansbrough – most people think that he’ll fail, so he can’t really bust, can he? I do like his chances more than most, though.
Chase Budinger – he’s been touted as a lottery pick ever since his freshman year. He’ll be fine because of his athleticism and range.
Terrence Williams – I’ve always liked him, but I don’t see him ever developing a reliable jumper. If he shot so poorly from 3pt range in college, how is that going to improve in the NBA when the line is much further back? I think I’ve said before that he just needs to establish a consistent release point, but I don’t know if he’ll ever do that.
Austin Daye – I’ve stated my case against Daye for a long time and I’m very tired of reading how he is one of the most “skilled” guys in the draft. I don’t really get that. I will say that he has a nice looking jumper and can block jump shots, but can he pass? Can he rebound? Can he move? He hasn’t shown any ability whatsoever in college that he can do that. For being so “skilled” he’s painfully slow and has terrible feet. I don’t get him at all.
Nick Calathes – no idea.
Gani Lawal – no idea
DaJuan Summers – no idea
Sam Young – tough player who can play a role, but not much more.
Darren Collison – was formerly thought to be a top 10 pick. I see a lot of Darrell Armstrong in him but with longer arms. That’s not too bad.
Toney Douglas – love him. He’ll be one of the better players in this draft.
Patrick Mills – tough guy who will play some decent minutes for a good team and a lot of minutes for a team that needs a point guard (and many other things)

It looks like there are around 17 guys that I like in this draft and around 6 that look like they have All-Star ability. Does that make it weak? Sure, I suppose so, but it doesn’t make it any weaker than any of the 9 previous years. Even the 2003 draft, widely believed to be one of the all-time best produced only 15 players worth talking about, of course, included in that list of 15 are four super-duper stars: LeBron James, Carmelo Anthony, Chris Bosh, Dwyane Wade, and four good players: David West, Kendrick Perkins, Leandro Barbosa, and Josh Howard, but that year was an aberration. More commonly, the drafts feature players who have similar ability and potential as this year’s class.

The point is, this draft is no weaker than any other year and I’m tired of reading that statement as if it were fact.

J.R. Smith etc.

2009-05-26T17:35:00.000-07:00

I’m with Jeff Van Gundy on this one; I didn’t know that J.R. Smith had this kind of court vision. The guy looked like a great point guard last night and he doesn’t even play the point. Finding an open teammate now and again is one thing, but he kept slipping great pass after great pass by people leading directly to dunks or layins. Now that he’s shown this part of his arsenal, is there any that he can’t do? I even saw him get pissed when there was a breakdown defensively leaving Jordan Farmar with a wide open three (which he missed). I’m baffled by this whole thing. It has become abundantly clear that Smith needed a guy like Chauncey Billups to take the knuckles out of his head. His game is completely different than it has been in years past because he’s now added defense and passing, you know, almost like a complete basketball player.

Is it possible that we’re seeing a superstar in the making? He’s 23 (turns 24 on Sept. 9). He bound by nothing physically because he’s got terrific size for a 1 or a 2 at 6’6 220. He has a beautiful jumpshot with unlimited range. He has good court awareness and a knack for finding open players (which has been apparent in this series). He’s explosive as hell, possessing a preposterous, but believable when you see him jump, 44-inch vert. (I really wish that he would have flushed right on Kobe’s head last night, even if it was a foul). He’s quick and fast. He’s strong. He’s got it all.

So, adding Chauncey Billups to his life has probably added several million dollars to his name because if he continues on this path of becoming a complete guard he will be a wildly valuable asset. Ever since he’s been in the NBA he’s either been first, second, or third team all knucklehead squad. He shot with no conscience and had no idea how to be a team player. Some switch must have been flipped because he doesn’t resemble, at all, the player that he used to be. He looked like the second coming of Larry Hughes. For those of you out there who have never seen Larry Hughes play, believe me, that’s not a compliment.

I’d like to see him become an even better defensive player and there is absolutely no reason why he can’t be because he’s so quick and strong. I’m excited about watching this dude explode. With his size and skills, I could easily see him averaging 25 points 6 assists 4 rebounds 2 steals through the prime of his career.

Oh, and he comes very cheap (relative to production) with a contract that will pay him about $5.5M through 2010-2011.

If Kenyon Martin really has a broken ring finger on his left hand and isn’t even taping it, then he truly is crazy. Right handed players who are shot blockers often block shots with their opposite hand. I have no idea how he’s doing this without writhing in pain. Broken fingers hurt!

Speaking of blocked shots… the Birdman is on a tear. Shannon Brown has got to know better than to throw up that weak mess.

I, like many others, was disappointed in Melo, but I’ll give him a pass if he had a stomach virus and was yakking. Along those lines, shouldn’t he be quarantined? The stomach flu is so incredibly contagious so shouldn’t we expect someone else to start heaving any second? On both teams? When I was in college, we had some crazy strain of stomach flu run through nearly our entire campus, causing people to expel out of the front and the rear. We dubbed it “The Beast.” It was like the movie Outbreak, except with better acting. Also, instead of some exotic monkey who spread the virus, we presumed that it was a friend of ours who was, and still is, shaped like a perfect square, who exposed everyone on campus. He probably picked up the strain at an exotic porn shop. The point is, as soon as one person got it, nearly everyone got it. I’ve got to think that Melo left some the virus all over the locker room and on the court. Someone else is going to come down with it, trust me.

Cleveland
I would be remiss if I didn’t harangue the Cleveland Cavaliers. With the exception of LeBron, whom I love, I hate their team right now. None of them can do anything. I don’t like Big Z, at all. I’d rather see Joe Smith out there. At least he can bend over and pick up a ball and he’s also shooting the ball really well. As opposed to Z who has been hitting some jumpers, but who doesn’t seem the least bit confident. Smith needs more minutes at the expense of Big Z and a guy I’ve already killed—the much despised Varejao. However, I’ve only railed against his personality rather than his ability, of which he has none, aside from being tall. But here’s the deal, he’s an awful player, who occasionally chases down rebounds, fouls people, and annoys the living hell out of the opposition, referees, fans, and probably his teammates. I loved watching him get beat so badly down the court by his man (Odom) who subsequently flushed it on the other end because he runs like he’s dragging 20 lbs of sand tied to each foot.

Additionally, and I’m not stating anything new here, Mo Williams and Delonte West have been atrocious, and that’s putting it mildly. I don’t see how Cleveland wins this series after watching three games. Orlando looks like the far better team, even without Dwight Howard. If they had Marcin Gortat playing instead of Howard, they’d still be in the same position. Dwight is good, but he’s not the difference maker (Gortat is much, much, much better than I realized, but still not “just as athletic” as Dwight Howard as Reggie Miller would have you believe). Rashard Lewis is playing like he’s getting paid insane money (oh wait, he is). Courtney Lee and Mickael Pietrus are fantastic role players and scorers. I was so wrong about this Cleveland team to the point of embarrassment. LeBron is doing this on his own (his block and alley oop the other night were breathtaking… he was above the square) and it’s really too bad. It’s not as if he’s not passing the ball, he’s doing that with regularity, but his team just keeps missing. Which reminds me, shouldn’t Wally Szerbiak get some run? If there is anything that the guy can do, it’s shoot, and no one else has been able to do it. He needs to play.

I’m fine with LeBron not driving to the hole every single time down the court (although that would be effective, it’s just not possible, he’s be completely spent after 2 quarters of doing that and playing defense). I just ask that when he settles for a jumper that he do so decisively. These jab-step-launching a 20%-chance-of-making-it jumper from 20 feet are not getting it done. It’s times like that when I have to concede to non-NBA fans the following: “Yes, that was a bad shot and makes for bad basketball viewing.”

If they don’t turn it around tonight, it’s curtains and I’m officially bummed about it because I’d like to see him win this year.

Cavs - Magic Game 2

2009-05-22T23:52:00.000-07:00

If you don’t like the NBA, fine. But if you love basketball and you aren’t watching what’s happening, then I don’t know how to relate to you.

Here’s a breakdown for you. With one second left on the clock, the best player in the NBA hit a fadeaway three at the buzzer for the win. Does that sound exciting enough for you? Thus far, every conference finals game has come down to the last shot or last possession. It’s not like these teams are bad and it’s a battle of attrition. We’re seeing really talented teams playing at peak levels. I’m sucked in completely. I love what I’m seeing. If anyone tells you that the NBA is boring, then they’re simply not watching the games. It’s that simple.

I was way off on this series though. I thought for sure that Cleveland was going to roll Orlando, especially the way that they were playing. However, it has become abundantly clear that Orlando is a gutsy team that can simply shoot the lights out and plays pretty decent defense. I love Rashard Lewis, as I’ve said before. Hedo is pretty much the same player. Both have a sense for the dramatic. Courtney Lee is going to outstanding, if he’s not already. I don’t care much for Skip. I think Howard is a beast, but he’s limited. They are a fun team to watch. If this series doesn’t go seven games I’m going to be surprised.

As for Cleveland, they played well in stretches and it’s nice to see Pavlovic get some run. He’s a talented player but don’t understand how a European shooter shoots only 40something percent from the free throw line. Is that even genetically possible? For awhile there, I was seriously thinking that Mo Williams was on the take. He looked like garbage for long stretches. I mean, he’s a shooter, and how many open threes does LeBron need to get him before he catches fire? I don’t know if I’m in the proper mindset to talk about this but I cannot believe how much I hate Anderson Varejao and I like this Cavs team (ok, I like LeBron, but still). I hate Varejao for the same reason I hated John Stockton. He’s a whiny little B. How can he, in good conscience, grab a guy’s arm and pull him down to pretend like he’s been pushed? That’s straight out of the Stockton handbook. Also, he thinks he’s fouled EVERY SINGLE TIME HE DOES ANYTHING and continually whines to the refs. I hate him. I don’t think he’s the same as Joakim Noah because Noah doesn’t complain like Varejao does. I just can’t stand how much he cries, it drives me crazy. I’ll root for an outright villain before I root for an cheating little sissy like Varejao.

Now that that’s off of my chest I look forward to watching the rest of the series. A few non sequiturs:

That’s an incredible sport coat, shirt, and tie combo by Mike Brown. Dude looks sharp.
Is the voice that chants “DE-FENSE” a computer? The same voice announces who scores or who was fouled etc. It’s brutal. He needs to knock it off.
TNT’s floating camera, which gives me the feeling that I’m hanging by a noose in the rafters, is not appreciated
SVG looks either like a cop or an old Vietnam vet buddy who is still running heroin out of the country. Or both.

Denver v. LA

2009-05-22T17:24:00.000-07:00

I am so pleased that I’m actually watching these NBA playoffs. These conference finals games are especially delectable, since each game has literally come down to the last possession.

The LA v. Denver game last night started out horribly because it looked like Denver’s players had spent their day off playing beach volleyball, lying in the sun, and blowing into Corona bottles—all while George Karl was trying to coax them back into their hotel rooms. Speaking of Karl, his face was so red and shiny last night that I couldn’t stop picturing him standing in the middle of the street, wearing a Tony Soprano robe, staring directly at the sun for 11 hours. You could have sautéed onions on his dome he was so hot. Also, I feared that his face was going to melt off from the heat (a la Raiders of the Lost Ark) when Denver allowed that inbounds play that went for a Pau Gasol dunk. That was absolutely amazing

Nevertheless, since LA looked terrible to begin game one (and won) and Denver looked terrible to begin game two (and won) I guess that means that starting out playing horribly is an advantage in this series.

I have one last thing about Karl’s appearance (or as I like to call it my “layup line”), his face is small. Really small. But his head is huge. It’s like his facial features are meant for a person with about 1/3 the size of his head. It’s not sweet to have a big head small face. But I guess that’s better than the alternative because you could have eyes on the top of your head, and that can’t look good.

Not sure if you knew this or not, but the TV cameras love Jack Nicholson. Hey, I love Colonel Jessup as well, but my goodness does he look terrible. They showed him sitting there and I couldn’t help but notice how extraordinarily flabby his belly is. It literally hangs down. Look, if you’re fat, it’s ok, but at least have the decency to put out a distended belly, not some horrible skin flap looking thing. I know that you’re old, Jack, but clean it up.

Now, about the game itself. I will continue to profess my love for Melo’s game, except his pouty, not getting back on defense b.s. that he must eradicate immediately. As such, my love is conditional. I’m hard to get. I enjoy watching Pau Gasol in the post, especially when he’s made up his mind that he’s going to score. He’s got great moves and is shockingly quick and aggressive when he wants to be. But then he gets semi-bullied by Kenyon Marin and he shuts down. It’s abundantly clear that you just need to push him around and hack him a little and he hates it. I do like him though, he shoots a great percentage and gets quality and garbage points.

I did not enjoy the officiating, as per usual, especially the 10 second delay blocking call that Dick Bavetta called on Nene (I think) and Kobe doing a full on two-handed shove in Dahnaty Jones’s back, causing him to fall on his face, right in front of Bavetta. Brutal.

A few other things about appearances, I’m doing left handed layups now, Andrew Bynum has the face of 14-year old, right down to the peach fuzz. It looks pretty clear to me that he’s never shaved before. Also, he’s huge. I don’t think he’s the second coming of Shaq or anything, but he’s a very quality big guy that shouldn’t be overpaid but probably will be.

I’ve said before how much I like Chauncey Billups. His game, demeanor, and everything are great. But he is kind of a weird-looking guy. I’ve said for years that he kind of looks like a long-lost Murphy brother, but a more accurate description is this. If, on that evolution scale (fish swimming, then getting on the beach and with its flippers turning into feet, then into an alligator and so on…) Eddie Murphy is the end of the evolution, then Chauncey is like 4-5 spots from him, with Eddie’s brother, Charlie Murphy right before Eddie. He just looks like a less evolved Murphy brother. But hey, I love the guy more than I love Eddie Murphy these days.

One final thing. I just read Bill Simmons’s mailbag this afternoon and saw this:

Editor's note: On Tuesday, ESPN.com examines the question of whether LeBron
James could play in the NFL. We talked to Bill Parcells, scouts, LeBron's high
school coaches and will have video of LeBron playing high school football.

Let it be known that I posted my take on this yesterday. If ESPN is the “Worldwide Leader” what does that make me?

P.S.

I smell Cleveland by 15 tonight…

Conference Finals and Gridiron LeBron

2009-05-21T12:56:00.001-07:00

Since I’m pulling for a Denver v. Cleveland final it makes perfect sense that both teams would go on to lose their opening games.

But here is what I saw ...

I saw a determined, strong as a bull, Carmelo Anthony. He’s an absolute beast to handle in the post and there isn’t enough praise to heap on his wildly improved three-point range.

A pretty bad game out of Chauncey Billups (and certainly out of J.R. Smith), right down to missing free throws (including two-in-a-row) which was almost jarring to see. He, like Anthony Carter, failed to close out on LA threes and it ended up costing them the game. I don’t see a need to double anyone but Kobe occasionally because Denver’s big guys (Nene, Martin, Birdman) can manhandle LA’s big guys (Gasol, Odom, Bynum) straight up. Of course Gasol and Odom are going to win some battles, but don’t give Fisher, Farmar, and Ariza consistent wide-open threes, because those are the only shots that they can make. I saw too many occasions where Chauncey or some other guard could have at least given a token close-out, but didn’t. They can’t do that again. Those threes got LA back into the game, but if Denver doesn’t shoot terribly from the line, they win that game going away. I’m still confident that they will take this series. I don’t see LA getting that lucky again – of course, I don’t see Kenyon Martin shooting the ball as well as he did the other night either… but I do believe that Melo will continue to indefensible.

I’m surprised that Orlando was able to take that game from Cleveland, but only in the result. These two teams look very even to me, and here I thought that Orlando would be lucky to win one game. I have a soft spot in my heart for Rashard because of the whole Seattle thing, and he really looks fantastic. I love watching him take the ball strong to the hoop, which is enabled by his fantastic jumper. He’s a tough cover at 6’10 and as agile as he is. His defense is bad and always has been, but that’s not where his value is. Dwight Howard is a physical marvel, but I stand by my proclamations that his post game is garbage. I did see a decent-looking running hook shot out of him (with touch) that surprised me, but I only saw it once. He’s mostly a dunking machine, which is working well for him to the tune of 30 points last night… Mikaele Pietrius looks great, by the way. He looks nothing like any Euro player that I’ve ever seen, of course, he’s not white, but still. His mentality is completely different than most Euro players. He’s aggressive and strong and athletic. I like his game and he looks like he could, at the very least, make LeBron work on offensive (and some on defense). He should be playing 35 minutes a game.

Now, to Cleveland… that fourth quarter was disgusting offensive basketball. The four corners, let LeBron hold the ball at the top of the key for 22 seconds jab stepping, and launching a terrible fadeaway 23 foot jumper just isn’t working for me. He was screaming-teakettle hot for awhile, hitting every midrange jumper he tossed up. He also nearly catapulted himself to the ceiling after that backdoor dunk. One other thing, that helpside swat of Howard’s shot was so incredible because you could see it coming as LeBron crept away from his man when it was clear what Howard’s intentions were. I love watching him play… except when they run the four corners offense. Then it’s horrible to watch. LeBron is the best player in the game not just because he can score, but because he creates so much trouble for the other team. Limiting him to that stupid offense hurts their team. His teammates need to be in constant motion to that he can hit them as they get separation from their man. LeBron’s gifts are showcased when he gets easy buckets for himself or his teammates, not when he’s forcing nochance fadeaway jumpers. Those types of shots lead to losses because their deflating and no one else is involved. It’s just a bad scene.

Speaking of LeBron, given that he is 6’8 and anywhere between 260 and 275, couldn’t he play (and excel) just about anywhere on the field in the NFL except offensive line, defensive tackle, tailback, or fullback? Here is how I see it:

Quarterback: He has tremendous court vision and I see no reason why this wouldn’t translate to the NFL. Is there any part of you that thinks that he can’t throw a football 70 yards in the air? He has great anticipation, a key component for a QB’s accuracy. He is commonly mentioned as one of, if not the fastest guys in the NBA. He has great size. He is a great leader. I have no doubt that he’d be a Pro Bowl QB. I say this without pause even though I’ve never seen him throw a football. You see, I know how to spot talent. That’s my gift.
NFL Comparison: Ben Roethlisberger + Michael Vick

Wide Receiver: The position he played as a high school all-state player in Ohio. He has huge hands, unparalleled leaping ability, great size and strength, explosive speed and quickness. He’s a runaway semi-truck when he screams through the lane in hoops, I see him doing the same thing when careening through the secondary. Because he’s so tall, I’m sure that corners would attempt to get up under his pads and jam him, but because he’s so athletic and strong, he’d brush them off and fly by them. Those commercials depicting him playing for the Browns are not far off. He could also be the first player to dunk a football on the crossbar from the plane of the goal line. But would that be a safety if he crossed the goaline but never set foot in the end zone and the ball sailed out of bounds after he dunked? Technically he broke the plane, which would mean it’s a TD and he maintained possession as he was double pumping. Maybe I’ll ask the NFL what they think. For the record, I rule that a TD just for sheer awesomeness. Of course, LeBron would have to long jump 30 feet (or 7 ¾ inches past the WORLD RECORD) in football pads just to get to the back of the end zone, not to mention needing to get above the crossbar to do so. Look, I put nothing past him, not even setting a world record in the middle of an NFL game.
NFL Comparison: Larry Fitzgerald + Andre Johnson + Terrell Owens + Tony Gonzalez (in other words, the best WR in the NFL)

(As an aside, look at the photo of him and Pacman... notice anything weird about it? LeBron has a cell phone clipped to his pants... I'm saddened by this. He went from being quite possibly the coolest cat in the world to possibly 2nd or 3rd place... disappointing).

Tight End: For the same reasons that he’d be a great wide receiver, he’d be a great tight end, but would be clearly wasted here. He certainly has the size and strength to do it, but he’d be called on to block too much, which he could do, but it makes much more sense to send him downfield, constantly.
NFL Comparison: Antonio Gates + Tony Gonzalez + Shannon Sharpe

Defensive End: He would be an absolute terror getting after the QB, with his size and physicality. Because he is so fast, he’d have terrifying closing speed as well. Teams would have to game plan around him for sure. Because I don’t know how he tackles in the open field, this is the best place for him because he can just hone in and kill people without having to adjust too much. If you can’t picture LeBron putting a swim moving Jason Smith, dipping his shoulder, exploding into Marc Bulger, and subsequently wearing Bulger’s spine as a boa, then you have no eye for the inevitable.
NFL Comparison: Mario Williams + Julius Peppers

Linebacker: He may struggle here in space and because of his size, offensive linemen may be able to get great leverage on him and shove him around. That being said, since he guards point guards from time to time, I see no reason why he couldn’t handle fleet-footed WRs as well. He has fantastic body control so he’d be able to stay with shifty dudes with no problem. I also like the idea of him leaping over linemen to sack the QB. That reminds me of a story of my friend Josh who, for a time, played QB for his high school freshman team. He was lined up under center playing against North Thurston and took the snap only to be grabbed by his shoulders and yanked to the ground after each subsequent snap. The linebacker was lined up directly in front of the center and kept reaching across and throwing him to the ground. The linebacker’s name? Mike Sellers, who happens to carry the nickname “Big Mike.” Look, if you play in the NFL and the guys around you deem it appropriate to toss “Big” into your nickname, then you are one big S.O.B. At the time, Sellers was a freshman and was probably already 6’4 200+ lbs. As it is, he’s 6’4 285 starting at fullback for the Washington Redskins. I saw Sellers once at a club when we were both seniors in high school. I was 5’11 150 at the time. He was 6’4 245. He did not look like a normal human being, starting with the size of his head, which looked like an oscillating fan crossed with a pumpkin.
NFL Comparison: A much taller Shane Merriman (he’s best suited as a 3-4 OLB).

Defensive Back: He would be the largest DB in captivity, which would be so weird to see. He has such speed and range so it makes sense to put him at FS and just let him completely control the field. QBs would be terrified to throw it anywhere near him because the normal rules wouldn’t apply. QBs would never be able to put touch on a ball because he’d go up and get it everytime. Their only hope would be to throw on a line underneath or go for the deep, deep ball and hopefully overthrow him. I see him being less successful as a CB because while he’s able to stop and start on a dime and cover smaller guys, physically he just won’t be able to keep that up because the other dudes are just closer to the ground. I do like the imagine I have in my mind of him jumping about six feet in the air and picking off passes with one hand.
NFL Comparison: A ridiculously tall Ed Reed

Special Teams: He would be the best FG blocker of all time, again, just like the commercial. He’d be just like Finch in Wildcats, except he’s not a morbidly obese extortionist.

So there you have it. I guess I’ll need to him in EA Sports NCAA Football and let you know which position makes the most sense for him and report back. If you’re wondering, and I know you are, my preferences are, in order: FG Blocker, WR, FS, QB, DE, OLB, TE.

Let Ron Mexico Play

2009-05-18T18:15:00.000-07:00

Grant Hill sounds exactly like Tony Dungy. I mean exactly like him. I was listening to the radio this morning and Hill was on the Mike & Mike show, but before I realized who it was I just assumed that it was Dungy, probably on the show to talk about visiting Michael Vick in prison. But it was Hill and he didn’t have anything interesting to say. That’s no knock on Hill, it’s just that he’s one of those boring/nice guys who doesn’t add much to a broadcast because he’s not especially insightful, he’s definitely not funny, but he’s a nice enough, well-spoken (channeling the Chris Rock Colin Powell bit) guy, who is good looking, so he get opportunities. You know, exactly like Tiki Barber.

Regarding Vick, I’ve been reading about his imminent release from prison and the possibility that he’ll have to kneel before Zod before he’s reinstated. I’ve also read that if Goodell does reinstate him, that he may make him sit out some games to punish him for what he’s done. I guess because a 23-month prison sentence wasn’t punishment enough. Why does the NFL feel the need to tack on its own extra special suspension? Because he lied to almighty Goodell? Does the suspension have any meaning to Vick? Does Goodell think that this extra suspension will make Vick more remorseful for what he’s done? If Goodell doesn’t want “bad” guys in his league, then he simply should use Vick as a warning to all of the current and prospective players in the NFL and deny him reinstatement. F with me and you don’t play in this league. Plain and simple. This half-assed possible suspension serves no purpose, unless, of course, that Goodell is using the suspension as a passive-aggressive way of denying Vick reentry. He could impose a suspension that is so onerous (eight games, for instance) that would turn off nearly every team in the league because they’d have to sign Vick knowing that he couldn’t play for half of the season. That might essentially end Vick’s chances this year. Plus, if he does come back as a QB, then it would be even more difficult for him to assimilate because, as we’ve been told many times, NFL playbooks are difficult to learn.

That being said, this may not matter to some teams because I doubt very seriously that any team looking at him views him as a fulltime solution at QB. Because of the NFL’s copycat nature, Vick, through a strange twist of fate, may be coming back into the league at the right time. Because of the University of Arkansas’s success running the “Wildcat” with Darren McFadden, and the subsequent success that Miami had with the formation last year, suddenly teams are looking for a guy who can possibly run this scheme a few times per game. To wit, Miami nabbed West Virginia’s Pat White in the second round solely for this purpose. White is essentially Michael Vick. They’re about the same size, both are extremely elusive, and both are left-handed. Of course, White does not have nearly the arm strength that Vick has (or had, we don’t know if he still has it) but he’s far more accurate, and while White is fast, he’s not the Madden-99-speed fast that Vick is (or was). Actually, the guy that Pat White resembles the most is Seattle’s Seneca Wallace. For those of us Seattle fans who want to see more of Wallace, perhaps this the year because Holmgren has departed and the new regime is probably a little less conservative than he was offensively (on a consistent basis, I’m not talking about flanking him out wide for one play in one playoff game). It would be hard for them to be as conservative and impossible to be more conservative. Wallace may actually get some burn this year in certain packages and not just because Hasselbeck is hurt, but because it’s part of the game plan. But I digress…

Back to Vick, he’ll be 29-years-old next month, and I haven’t seen any footage of him running or throwing a football, but suffice to say, he’s going to be rusty. I doubt that he’s anywhere near tip-top shape, I’m guessing that a near superhero-level elite athlete like Vick can rebound with aplomb.

As an aside, with the advent of the Wildcat and Vick’s likely position running such an offense, it’s a good thing that he never had any problems with cats or else his comeback could go awry. Although I suppose that it’s possible that the authorities haven’t unearthed “Bad Pusseeezzz Kat Fightazzz,” the underground mountain lion fighting ring that Vick is financing.

Taking a look at current NFL rosters after the draft and free agency, here are each team’s QB situations.

AFC East:

New England: QB1 Tom Brady, QB2 Kevin O'Connell, QB3 Matt Gutierrez

New York Jets: QB1 Kellen Clemens, QB2 Mark Sanchez (R), QB3 Erik Ainge

Miami: QB1 Chad Pennington, QB2 Chad Henne, QB3 Pat White (R)

Buffalo: QB1 Trent Edwards, QB2 Ryan Fitzpatrick

AFC South:

Indianapolis: QB1 Peyton Manning, QB2 Jim Sorgi, QB3 Curtis Painter (R)

Jacksonville: QB1 David Garrard, QB2 Cleo Lemon, QB3 Todd Bouman

Tennessee: QB1 Kerry Collins, QB2 Vince Young, QB3 Patrick Ramsey

Houston: QB1 Matt Schaub, QB2 Dan Orlovsky

AFC North:

Pittsburgh: QB1 Ben Roethlisberger, QB2 Dennis Dixon, QB3 Charlie Batch

Baltimore: QB1 Joe Flacco, QB2 Troy Smith, QB3 John Beck

Cleveland: QB1 Brady Quinn, QB2 Derek Anderson, QB3 Brett Ratliff

Cincinnati: QB1 Carson Palmer, QB2 J.T. O'Sullivan, QB3 Jordan Palmer

AFC West:

Denver: QB1 Kyle Orton, QB2 Chris Simms, QB3 Tom Brandstater (R)

San Diego: QB1 Philip Rivers, QB2 Billy Volek, QB3 Charlie Whitehurst

Kansas City: QB1 Matt Cassel, QB2 Brodie Croyle, QB3 Tyler Thigpen

Oakland: QB1 JaMarcus Russell, QB2 Jeff Garcia, QB3 Andrew Walter

NFC East:

New York Giants: QB1 Eli Manning, QB2 David Carr, QB3 Rhett Bomar (R), QB4 Andre Woodson

Philadelphia: QB1 Donovan McNabb, QB2 Kevin Kolb, QB3 A.J. Feeley

Dallas: QB1 Tony Romo, QB2 Jon Kitna, QB3 Stephen McGee (R)

Washington: QB1 Jason Campbell, QB2 Todd Collins, QB3 Colt Brennan

NFC South:

Tampa Bay: QB1 Byron Leftwich, QB2 Luke McCown, QB3 Josh Freeman (R), Josh Johnson

Carolina: QB1 Jake Delhomme, QB2 Josh McCown, QB3 Matt Moore

Atlanta: QB1 Matt Ryan, QB2 Chris Redman, QB3 D.J. Shockley

New Orleans: QB1 Drew Brees, QB2 Mark Brunell (what?), QB3 Joey Harrington

NFC North:

Green Bay: QB1 Aaron Rodgers, QB2 Matt Flynn, QB3 Brian Brohm

Minnesota: QB1 Tarvaris Jackson, QB2 Sage Rosenfels, QB3 John David Booty

Chicago: QB1 Jay Cutler, QB2 Caleb Hanie, QB3 Brett Basanez

Detroit: QB1 Daunte Culpepper, QB2 Matthew Stafford (R), QB3 Drew Stanton

NFC West:

Arizona: QB1 Kurt Warner, QB2 Matt Leinart, QB3 Brian St. Pierre

Seattle: QB1 Matt Hasselbeck, QB2 Seneca Wallace, QB3 Mike Teel (R)

San Francisco: QB1 Shaun Hill, QB2 Damon Huard, QB3 Alex Smith

St. Louis: QB1 Marc Bulger, QB2 Kyle Boller, QB3 Brock Berlin

Any team with a young QB as a starter or as a starter of the future is likely out because the attention that Vick will receive will detract from the young QB’s development. Even if it’s best for young QBs to fly under the radar, I’ve got to think that the distractions from a media perspective will cause the young QB to harbor some resentment. So for that reason, the following teams are out: New York Jets (Sanchez and Clemons), Miami (Henne and White), Houston (Schaub, while he’s not exactly young, he hasn’t started much, plus he was Vick’s backup and I’m sure he’s telling the front office to stay the hell away), Baltimore (Flacco and Smith, kind of), Buffalo (Edwards), Cleveland (Quinn), Oakland (Russell), Washington (Campbell), Tampa Bay (Freeman and Johnson), Atlanta (Ryan and other reasons), Green Bay (Rodgers, Brohm, and Flynn), Chicago (Cutler – he would melt down), and Detroit (Stafford).

Similarly, any team that has an established core of three QBs that suit their needs or who don’t gamble on “character risks” (either they never have or have sworn off of them) will be eliminated. So the following teams are out: Indianapolis (they’ve got as solid 1 and 2 in the league and a pretty decent rookie in Painter at 3), Tennessee (after dealing with Vince Young, would they want to pick up Vick? I could see if they dumped VY, but not if they kept him), Cincinnati (come on, they can’t do it, right?), Kansas City (they’ve got a solid 1-3), New York Giants (Plaxed out), Philadelphia (McNabb still has it; despite Kolb’s meltdown, they still like him; Feeley is capable especially at no. 3), Dallas (Jerry Jones has to draw the line somewhere, doesn’t he?), Minnesota (while their QB situation is far from solid, they’re still holding the line for the stubbled one), and Seattle (for two reasons: 1. Ruskell is a slave to character, 2. Mora would never coach him again).

Some teams already have a player like Vick in the mix without the baggage, so they’d likely be out as well (I already mentioned Miami for different reasons): Pittsburgh (Dixon)

That leaves the following teams in play: New England, Jacksonville, Denver, San Diego, Carolina, New Orleans, Arizona, San Francisco, and St. Louis.

So let’s take a closer look at these remaining teams:

New England. Brady is coming off of his serious knee injury and we’re all expecting him to be fine, especially given that they let Cassel walk for a second rounder. But no one has seen Kevin O'Connell or Matt Gutierrez play any meaningful minutes. Vick would be surrounded by a team chockfull of veterans and would have no pressure to perform except in limited circumstances (or in case Brady goes down again). He would best be used in a package situation because New England’s offense requires an accurate passer and Vick has never been that.

Jacksonville. David Garrard is a good player who had a down year in ’08, but their backups are not inspiring. I’d be surprised if Cleo Lemon and Todd Bouman could beat Vick in a pie-eating contest much less for the number 2 job in Jacksonville. They’ve got a good running game and a revamped offensive line and a fairly basic offense. Vick could excel here as a package guy and as a backup.

Denver. No one knows what the hell is going on there. Kyle Orton is a nice QB, who can throw it around a little bit and might very well thrive under McDaniel’s guidance. Chris Simms is always going to be a guy who people are going to be disappointed in because he really looks like he should be better. The whole spleen thing really screwed him up and he hasn’t gotten any real action for a long time. No one knows if he’s any good or not, but if he was, it would make sense that he’d see the field given the lack of quality QB play in the league overall the last few years. I am unfamiliar with third-stringer Tom Brandstater. Vick would do well here in packages, but since the offense would be similar to what McDaniels ran in New England, it’s not well-suited to Vick’s strengths. Also, unless Vick could also play defense, I’m pretty sure everyone in Denver would be pissed. If he did join the team, he could wear No. 7 because no one of any note wore that number here, right?

San Diego. Billy Volek and Charlie Whitehurst at 2 and 3. Come on. Volek had some crazy games in Tennessee a few years ago, but he’s not that good and I’m sure that Clemson fans could tell you a thing or two about Whitehurst. Vick is clearly superior to both of those guys and you know how much he loves throwing to tight ends and even though Antonio Gates is getting old, he can still bring it. Plus they’ve got a great running game. San Diego looks very promising for Vick as a Wildcat QB and backup, even if Tomlinson might get upset about getting TD passes taken away from him.

Carolina. Jake Delhomme was as bad as he possibly could have been against Arizona in the playoffs last year. Josh McCown may be an able backup, but doesn’t seem to have much more ability than that. Matt Moore could grow into something given time, but he’s not going to threaten any number 2 guy out there right now, much less any starter. They have an absolutely fabulous running game featuring DeAngelo Williams and Jonathan Stewart aka “Double Trouble” formerly known as “Smash and Dash.” With the addition of Vick, I’d suggest that they change the moniker to “Boom Bash Dash” which, aside from sounding incredibly cool, actually fits their running styles and would be harrowing for D-coordinators to stop if all three were on the field at the same time. In case you’re wondering: Vick is “Boom” (as in “boom” he’s gone), “Bash” is Stewart (because of his bruising running style—and underrated speed), and “Dash” is Williams (because of his speed both in the hole and breakaway). Yes, I’m a loser.

New Orleans. I love Drew Brees and so does the City of New Orleans and his coach. Vick’s role here would be solely for Wildcat package purposes and to cause D-coordinators to dampen their khakis when he and Reggie Bush are on the field. They could run the legitimate veer option and gain 10 yards a pop. Believe it. The backup QB situation is pathetic here. I loved Mark Brunell—19 years ago at UW, now? Please. As for Joey Harrington. I’m not even going to waste my time. Let’s just say Vick has a good chance of making this team.

Arizona. Just as in New Orleans, Vick would go here as a Wildcat specialist. Warner is entrenched (obviously) and to the extent that Arizona still has faith in Leinart, it would be weird if he was pushed out in favor of Vick. I’m wholly unfamiliar with Brian St. Pierre. I doubt that Arizona would make this move. I don’t have much else to say here except that I look forward to them having a letdown year and Anquan Boldin playing for someone else (please).

San Francisco. Let’s be honest with each other here. San Francisco’s QB situation might be the worst in the league. I’ve been hearing about this as a team on the rise, but how could that be with these as your top three guys: Shaun Hill, Damon Huard, and Alex Smith? Get the hell out of here. There’s no chance. Huard has had his chances and has hung on in the league far longer than anyone could have anticipated and good for him for doing so, but get real. Alex Smith has been on death watch for years now (even though he did renegotiate his deal to stick around, everyone always says that he’s a really bright guy…). Vick could absolutely give this team some life, so much so that he could literally compete for the starting job.

St. Louis. Ok, St. Louis might be in a worse QB situation than San Francisco. That’s not entirely fair because Marc Bulger is still a nice player, but he’s suffered some injuries and there is no chance that either Kyle Boller or Brock Berlin will be successful. Boller has had numerous chances to make his way and has failed miserably. Berlin was awesome. In high school. Not since. Vick might be a good backup guy here and since they already have a guy who killed someone on their team, they could make room for a dog murderer.

Of the teams that I’ve decided could take a look at him for various reasons, I like Carolina, Jacksonville, and San Diego as my top three destinations for him. All three are in smallish markets, so the national spotlight would not shine too brightly on him or the team, he would be able to make a difference on winning teams by playing in spot situations, and he fits the personnel of the teams.

As a dog owner, I view Vick as a despicable human being and I wish (as he does, I’m sure) that he had the good sense to not commit those terrible acts (dude, a rape stand?), and I hope that he never has a chance to play again, or if he is, that he has to run from a pack of rabid dogs in order to gain reinstatement. As a football fan and a guy who is entertained simply by watching an incredible athlete run as fast as he can, I want Vick back in the game—or to watch a video of Vick running from said dogs, either one.

Goodbye, Beantown

2009-05-17T21:24:00.000-07:00

While I enjoyed all of the drama that Boston brought to the NBA playoffs these past two years, I'd be lying if I didn't say that I'm glad to see them go. They're missing one of their best players and what they've done without Garnett is admirable. We got to see two young big guys grow up and emerge as solid role players in Big Baby Davis and Kendrick Perkins. We got to see Rajon Rondo play the point guard position as well as anyone (he's even got some confidence in his jumper, watch out league...). We got to see Ray Allen's long-legged, busty jumper. And we got to see Paul Pierce coaxing more out of one of the most unathletic bodies that a superstar NBA swingman can posses in 2009. But they fell on their face in this game and ran into an Orlando team that simply played better, smarter, and hit huge shots time and time again. So that's it. I'm dying to see what Cleveland is going to do to them, though. They are a tough as nails team that has a completely healthy roster, and the best player in the game. I don't see this ending well for Orlando.

A few things about the game:

Reggie Miller said that Marcin Gortat is “just as athletic as Dwight Howard.” Look, that’s a very nice thing for Miller to say about Gortat, but with all due respect to Gortat's considerable abilities (afterall, he IS playing meaningful minutes for a team that is in the Eastern Conference Finals) but considering that Howard is one of the best athletes in the world in any sport (is Gortat even the best athlete from Poland?), it’s probably safe to say that Miller should rethink his comment. I know it’s hard to come up with things on the air, but you can’t just say something like that. At the very least, Marv should have made fun of him.

While Howard is a phenomenally rare athlete he simply has no ability to shoot the ball in the post, unless he’s attempting bury the ball and rim into the floor. I don’t mean to be too disparaging here, but when I watch him shoot, the first thing that comes to mind is a girl I went to high school with who would shoot without looking at the rim. Honestly, he just needs to slow down, and that may come in time, but we’ll see. As I've said before, I have my doubts.

It’s weird seeing a guy like Big Baby Davis, who is significantly less physically gifted than Howard, have a much more refined offensive game, but he definitely does.

While Howard had great anticipation to block shots and probably earned his defensive player of the year award, a 6’2 Rajon Rondo should not dunk on you. At the very least, Howard should have shoved Rondo’s ass to the ground. In fairness to Howard, he didn’t see Rondo soon enough, but still. It’s not the first time it’s happened.

Another thing that I’ve noticed during this series and many others is the reluctance of some guards to pass the ball when they have clear paths to the hoop for fear of getting their shots blocked. I suppose that they do this because so many guys in the NBA can shoot jumpers at a high percentage. As good as a Rashard Lewis jumper is from 25 feet, it seems like a Rafer Alston layin from 1 foot is better. Maybe he’d get his shot tossed back in his face, it’s still good to challenge dudes at the rim. I say this, but yet I’m sure I’d do the same thing if a 6’10 Kendrick Perkins was staring me in the face.

One last thing: Hey, Boston fans, just because your guys miss shots or something doesn’t go your way, doesn’t mean that your player was fouled, just so you know. Also, nice of these Great Boston Fans to stick around for the end of the game. At least they aren’t frontrunners.

Mile High

2009-05-13T22:03:00.000-07:00

I really like this Denver team and I’m reiterating my thoughts that they will take down the Lakers.

They are playing great team basketball. They’re making the extra pass and getting easy buckets. Their frontline is intimidating and can finish (although Martin needs to crush some of those layins and remove all doubt that the ball is going through the hoop). They can score in crazy bunches. I just like what I’m seeing.

I also love the way that Chauncey Billups plays. Tom Friend had a cool, lengthy feature the other day kind of explaining why Billups is who he is. I enjoyed it immensely.

There really is no reason not to like the guy, especially since he is so clearly in command of this team and can dress down even the seemingly undressdownable Kenyon Martin. For instance, at the end of the first half Billups waved away Nene as he attempted to set a screen and pointed at Martin. Martin came over, but didn’t do so with much urgency, so Billups took it to the hole, got fouled, and made the shot, he walked toward Martin pointed, and said, “I wanted YOU in the pick and roll, dog.” Martin did not argue, but instead repeated “My bad” several times. Martin was wrong. Billups was right. Martin knew it. It’s almost like he’s a dad out there. He has this way about him where he almost nonverbally says, “It’s not that I’m mad, I’m just disappointed.” Anyway, he’s such a smart offensive player and it’s really clear why his teammates love playing with him.

However, I do not like the way that he played defense on Jason Kidd. Look, we all know Kidd is past his prime, certainly defensively, but he’s still crafty and quick with the ball in his hands, as evidenced by the several occasions where he actually And1 Mixtaped Billups on defense and drove straight to the hole, except he never finished, but that’s a different matter. Another thing is that he, and several Dallas players (Howard, Terry, sometimes Dirk) were left WIDE open on threes. Denver plays very good defense in the post and on drives to the basket, but for some reason they do a really poor job closing out on three-point shooters, which is strange. It’s one of the easier things to do because while it takes effort, the effort required is minimal. They can’t continually do that against a good shooting team and expect to survive (although they just did that, didn’t they? So what am I talking about?)

I’m a converted Melo believer. I’ve wanted to like the guy for a few years now and he’s convinced me that he’s worthy. He’s such an explosive offensive force and is actually showing quite a bit of defensive prowess, as evidenced by his strong post defense against Dirk. Granted, Dirk is not a post player, but Melo did not give any ground and did not bite on Dirk’s many, many headfakes. Since he’s such a solidly built guy with quickness and speed, so it makes sense that he should be a good defender. Actually, the only thing holding him back is effort. He’ll get there though. But his real value, obviously, is his offense. He’s such a strong player going to the hole, his straight-up-and down jumper looks great and when he’s on, it’s like his shot finds the bottom of the net quicker than most. It’s kind of like when people talk about how a ball sounds different when it comes off Josh Hamilton’s bat. Melo’s swishes are just prettier than most.

A few other random thoughts:

I hated PJ Carlesimmo as the coach for the Sonics, but I must admit, he’s a good color analyst. The guy knows what he’s talking about and he doesn’t come across as a jerk that I’d perceived to be. He doesn’t belabor points, he doesn’t seem to have any grudges, he doesn’t over-talk, and he’s been around the league for so long he knows all of the players really well. What can I say? I like the guy.
Another guy that I like is Brandon Bass. He’s a tough, effort guy with some skills, a decently reliable jumper, and doesn’t seem to be a quitter. He showed a ton of heart down the stretch when the game looked like it was out of hand. Anyway, I’ll say this, even though he’s only 6’7 or 6’8 I’d much rather have him at $2-3M per year (he’s an unrestricted free agent and made under $830K this year) than Erick Dampier at $11M per year through the 2011 season, but that’s just me. But I hammered this point home earlier.
I don’t like the Pepsi Center. It looks fine on TV and I’m sure it’s a nice place to watch a game, but man, it seats over 19K, but the acoustics make it sound like there are far less people in there. It’s like the noise just evaporates. I felt the same way about Dallas’s American Airlines Center (which seats over 20K). Maybe they need to lower the ceilings or something, but it just sounds dead in those arenas.
Just how disgusting is that Dominos Pasta Bread Bowl? I thought that we had turned into a very carb-conscious society, so how did this make it through testing? What’s next, a baked potato bread bowl stuffed with fettuccini alfredo and topped with croutons with a side of chips? I’m curious to see how these things sell. My guess? Very well.
I am thoroughly enjoying the "Old School" T-Mobile commercial with Barkley, Magic, and Dr. J. I especially enjoy the poster and video game case depicting a caricature of Barkley playing hoop in red Chuck Taylors and a hospital gown with an IV in his arm. Nice subtle move by the T-Mobile folks. The three of them look legitimately sad about wearing the motion capture outfits. Also, they don’t overact, but instead play it straight up, and it’s legitimately funny. Nice job, fellas.
I seriously doubt that I’ll be “Meeting the Browns.”

Post Ty

2009-05-12T12:54:00.000-07:00

As fans of UW Football, we were all hoping that Willingham wasn’t as much of an ass as he seemed to be. He came to UW not a as a savior really, but rather a guy that the administration thought would bring accountability, hard work, and honor back to the program. When he was hired, I didn’t know too much about him except that it looked like he was forced out of Notre Dame unfairly. But then, I don’t care for Notre Dame, and I figured that anything that they did was nefarious in a secret society kind of way.

The only opinion that I really had about Willingham was that he was boring. I recall bits and pieces of his opening press conference at Notre Dame when he was clearly kissing up to the administration by talking about ending practice at a time so that his players could attend church service at “Twelve Noon.” I remember thinking three things: (1) “who says twelve noon?” (2) “Wow, I didn’t know that Notre Dame was so religious,” and (3) “Willingham sounds really, really, really boring.”

He had a great first season with the Irish going 10-3 but got throttled 28-6 by NC State in the Gator Bowl. His next two seasons were massive disappointments at 5-7 and 6-5 which featured several blowout losses (if that wasn’t a harbinger for UW, then I don’t know what was).

He had an OK record at Notre Dame and he may have been fired a little too quickly, but looking back, is that really the case? Wouldn’t he have just dug Notre Dame into a deeper hole? We can only wish that he’d stayed there longer because while Notre Dame thinks that it is better than everyone else, they can’t hold the jocks of non-BCS schools like Boise State, Utah, BYU, and even Fresno State, but that’s another rant for another day. The point is Notre Dame fired him and he ended up at UW where he stood on a program that was mired in a tar pit and did nothing to prevent it from sinking into its murky depths, but instead stood with his arms folded, hand on his chin, wearing his sunglasses and headset.

He had many problems, but here are a few that stood out:

He was never upfront with the media.
Because of this, no one knew exactly what was going on. Not the media, not the fans. Everyone was left to try and interpret his cryptic comments in search of real meaning. In response to direct questions (e.g. “What went wrong with the running game today, why did you keep running the ball up the middle with Chris Polk when he was gaining a yard at best?”), he would “answer” with nonspecific pabulum, such as (and I’m paraphrasing here): “You want to win in the game of football, oookaaay, and when you don’t win, it’s frustrating, but we are all dedicated to winning the game of football.”

Thanks, Ty. So what does that even mean? There is probably one reason why coaches do this and it’s because they abhor the media. But there are different motivations for different coaches. Let’s take two extreme examples: Bill Belichick and Tyrone Willingham.

Belichick pulls the “I hate talking to you people and will say as little as possible” stunt all of the time, but it’s different with him because he wins. He does not want to talk to anyone about his team because it could give a competitive advantage to the opposition (I guess). So he’s curt and boring and he does this so he can get the hell away from the media as soon as possible.

Willingham pulls the same stunt, but has a very different motivation, which is: he has no idea what to say because he doesn’t know what he was doing. Both are strategic moves for the coaches. They want to hold things close to the vest. Belichick does it to protect his knowledge and to protect his team. Willingham does it to hide his lack of knowledge and to blame his team. They behave in much the same manner, but have very different motivations.

A good friend of mine has an uncle who played football professionally and subscribes to this theory about Willingham. The more I think about it, the more it makes sense. Actually, the more everything makes sense about his entire reign at UW. He wanted to portray a certain image and wanted people to think that he was: professional, stoic, measured, reserved, respected, disciplined, and intellectual. He may actually have been one or two of these things, but these character traits really were a mask. As the Fugees once said, “Yeah everybody wears a mask but how long will it last?” Willingham acted the way that he did with the media, with former players, with fans, and with boosters because under his professional veneer was a shocking abundance of ignorance. He never had any answers so the best way to deal with that is to completely make it uncomfortable for anyone to speak with him. Conversations with people were always short because people got tired of talking to him. So his plan worked. He never had to really explain himself. Now the closed practice thing makes sense, because he didn’t want anyone to know that all he did was walk around practice for a few hours looking like a general (we can only surmise) when really all he was doing was waiting for practice to end so he could go home. I’m sure it seemed like he was just giving his position coaches and coordinators the freedom to coach, but really he couldn’t have helped them in any way because, again, he did not know what he was doing. If he opened practices, then people who actually know what to look for in a coach would know that he was a fraud and he might have been called out even sooner.

We probably never heard about this because his assistant coaches would never sell him out while they worked for him because, hey, he game them their job and loyalty goes a long way. If they badmouthed Willingham, then they’d be labeled backstabbers. If that’s the case, then how do they get hired by the next guy? It’s in their best interest to keep their mouths shut.

For the players, what do they really know? If they didn’t transfer into the program, then Willingham would have been their only exposure to a college head coach on a daily basis. So through no fault of their own, they’re unaware of how a successful coach runs his program.

You have to admit, it makes sense.

He sold out his players.
Several times during Willingham’s tenure he would lead his players to the slaughter. A comment like “We didn’t execute” is code for “Hey, this isn’t my fault, my players suck and didn't do what I told them to do.” I’m a firm believer that coaches should never baby their players and should hold them accountable for things that they do wrong. But a good coach wouldn’t air out his players in public, but rather would kick their ass behind closed doors. I never heard him do anything like that, instead, he employed classic passive-aggressive behavior and essentially talked behind their backs, but in broad daylight, if that makes any sense. Perhaps he was just “sending a message” but the way he acted, frankly, was cowardly. Especially when he, as head coach, is to blame.

Also, when players were hurt or injured, he’d always play it down. Perhaps he was doing this because he didn’t want his players to use injuries as an excuse for bad play, but it still made those players look like fools if they were playing poorly. Instead of them being hobbled and unable to make a play because of a physical malady of some sort, Willingham would trot out his: “We just didn’t execute in the football game” line.

Another thing, I’m not 100% sure he knew the names of all of his players or anyone else in college football. He’d constantly refer to “our running back” or “the young man” or “number X” when referring to a specific player. I could never figure out what sort of mind game he was playing with all of us. Is it like not mentioning a competitor in a commercial and instead calling it “another leading brand?” I suppose that would make sense if he was talking about opposing players, by not wanting to give them credit or something, but he’d often do it with his own players. Was he trying to maintain some sort of weird distance with players in his program? I’m now convinced that there is a more simple explanation. He just didn’t know their names.

Anyway, now he’s gone and I couldn’t be happier, but on his way out he managed to tank swimming right along with the football team. The funds from his buyout would have more than made up for the cost to run the swim team, at least for the next year, who knows what would have happened after that. Willingham could mend a lot of fences if he donated some cash back to the school to save swimming, but he’s probably too professional, stoic, measured, reserved, respected, disciplined, and intellectual to do something like that.

I am overjoyed with the future prospects of this program under Sarkisian though. He’s everything Willingham is not. Personality is one thing and Sarkisian’s got truckloads of it, which is great, but his willingness to engage the media and fans and speak about his team shows me that he is confident and competent in addition to being fun to listen to. If he fails it won’t be because of lack of effort or knowledge, it will be because this program has fallen to such depths that it cannot be revived in five years or less. I’m attempting to temper my enthusiasm, but it’s difficult to do so when reading things about him and the recruiting efforts that he and his staff are taking. He also seems a lot more invested in the program, inventive in his approach to the game, and, to be honest, more trustworthy, than Willingham.

It would be glorious if he could lead them to a bowl game this year, but even the most ardent supporters don’t believe that will happen and are giving him time to implement his scheme, get his players in here, and change the losing attitude.

While I’ve known the schedule for quite some time, I haven’t done the game-by-game thing, so let’s do it now, just for fun. And in case you didn’t know, last year I picked this team to go 7-5. Unbelievable.

2009 Football schedule

Sat., Sept. 5 LSU – loss (LSU’s purple and gold program is so far ahead of UW’s it’s laughable. The offense is no great shakes, but LSU’s defense will cause all kinds of problems. The speed on the field will be shockingly one-sided.)
Sat., Sept. 12 Idaho – win (I’m happy to see them back on the schedule, welcome, Vandals.)
Sat., Sept. 19 USC – loss (but I feel kind of good about this game, the team lost a lot on defense and has a new QB even though their skill players are still great)
Sat., Sept. 26 at Stanford – win (I’m not confident in this pick, but Stanford has lost a lot and are engulfed in a QB controversy. They also may lose their highly productive RB, Toby Gerhart, to baseball).
Sat., Oct. 3 at Notre Dame – loss (they are not that impressive, but they weren’t impressive last year and for all intents and purposes held UW under 100 yards of offense last year. Of course that was with Ronnie Fouch running the show…)
Sat., Oct. 10 Arizona – win (No more Willie “Light Up UW” Tuitama. That’s a good thing.)
Sat., Oct. 17 at Arizona State – win (They’ve lost a ton of players, including their QB, and were highly overrated last year anyway. I don’t like this team at all).
Sat., Oct. 24 Oregon – loss (Despite losing quite a few quality starters, they are still far superior than UW at this point).
Sat., Nov. 7 at UCLA – win (They’ve got huge QB problems, don’t have a stocked cupboard, and Neuheisel doesn’t have them going yet).
Sat., Nov. 14 at Oregon State – loss (this is a very good team that has a good, experienced QB and explosive playmakers. This game could get out of hand.)
Sat., Nov. 28 Washington State – win (they were dreadful last year and nothing tells me that they’ll be anything but atrocious next year. They have not solved their QB questions and are lacking across the board and lost Brandon Gibson).
Sat., Dec. 5 California – loss (another very good team that may just throttle UW).

Final Tally: 6- 6

Look what I just did. I just made fun of myself for predicting that UW would go 7-5 in 2008 and now I’ve made them bowl eligible in Sarkisian’s first year? What’s wrong with me? I’m way too cynical to be such an optimist. But going through this game-by-game exercise you have to admit that it’s possible, right? Ok, maybe I’m being a little too bullish on their chances against the Arizonas and Stanford…nevertheless I’ve now convinced myself that 4-8 would be a disappointment, 5-7 is the most realistic, and 6-6 is attainable.

That’s not too much to ask, right? Right!?

Please let me be right.

I love college football and I need UW to be relevant again because I can’t, in good conscience, leap into the arms of another program next year without feeling dirty. Being just a little too interested in how Georgia is going to do with the loss of Knowshon Moreno and Matthew Stafford just won’t sit well with me.

The Cohen Brothers

2009-05-11T12:56:00.000-07:00

I saw Burn After Reading this weekend and while I heard that the movie wasn’t very good, I wasn’t prepared for 96 minutes that felt like 180 minutes. This was dreck. My knee-jerk reaction was something like, “How can the Cohen brothers, the geniuses behind Fargo, The Big Lebowski, and O Brother, Where Art Thou give me something as crappy as Burn After Reading?” As an aside, you’ll notice that I did not include Raising Arizona in the mix of genius-level movies. The reason is simple. I did not like that movie. I realize that many people do and are baffled when I tell them that Raising Arizona simply doesn’t do it for me. I’m sorry. I just don’t like it.

Back to the Cohen brothers, I'm not sure why I was surprised that Burn After Reading was so bad because this isn’t the first time that they’ve lobbed a bag of vomit at me. Granted, I haven’t seen all of their movies, but I have seen several. Here’s the list and my comments next to each:

Blood Simple. (1984) – didn’t see it.
Crimewave (1985) – didn’t see it.
Raising Arizona (1987) – didn’t like it.
Miller's Crossing (1990) – interesting Irish gangster movie. I didn’t see it when it was new, but saw it probably about 10 years ago. I remember liking it, but not loving it by any stretch.
Barton Fink (1991) – this was an extremely weird movie filled with caricatures and themes, I wasn’t into it.
The Hudsucker Proxy (1994) – absolutely horrible. Tim Robbins was lame in this movie and I wanted to punt Jennifer Jason Lee out of a skyscraper’s window as soon as she appeared on screen. I hated this movie so very much.
Fargo (1996) – One of my favorite movies of all time. I love the story. I love the characters. To this day I still quote the movie (“You’re such a super lady!”) and I will always watch it if it’s on TV. It’s a nearly perfect movie.
The Big Lebowski (1998) – Quite possibly my favorite comedy of all time. Walter’s anger is fantastic. The Dude is flawless, and every character is wonderfully played (although I could have done without Julianne Moore to be honest). Gets high marks for possibly being more quotable for me than Fargo is. Also, for how mellow The Dude is, I love how he gets frustrated with Knox Harrington, the video artist. As a bonus, we named one of our intramural hoops teams in law school “Autobahn.”
O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000) – This movie was great but does not reach Fargo or Lewbowski territory. However, it’s beautifully shot. The artistry is amazing and Clooney is very good. Also, the music is fantastic and the sirens scene is super, duper cool.
The Man Who Wasn't There (2001) – I didn’t see any reason to watch this one.
Intolerable Cruelty (2003) – massively disappointing. So much overacting and wildly uninteresting.
The Ladykillers (2004) – sometimes just having an accent isn’t funny enough, Tom Hanks. More overacting here. Simply a stupid movie. Although I did like how the guy’s face in the painting kept changing. That was kind of funny.
No Country for Old Men (2007) – They did a great job with this one. The movie stayed very true to the book and the casting was great. I enjoyed this a great deal.
Burn After Reading (2008) – one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. I knew it would be terrible minutes into it because of Frances McDormand’s scene in the clinic. The jokes weren’t funny, the accents weren’t funny, she wasn’t funny (and she's typically great). It sucked. I’m a Brad Pitt fan and he brought absolutely nothing to the table. It’s just like they decided to make Brad Pitt play a kind of dorky guy and that would be enough to make it good. It wasn’t. Same with Clooney, I love the dude, but his character was unappealing, unlikeable, and far from funny. Whatever. I was pissed that I sat through this.
Hail Caesar (2009) (pre-production) - I know nothing about this.
A Serious Man (2009) (post-production) – or this.

So, of the 11 movies that these guys have made, I’ve loved three, liked one, was lukewarm on one, and hated six.

None of this means anything except that I (or you) should not blindly think that a Cohen brothers movie will be good.

It’s just strange that guys this talented who put out such great stuff can then release garbage like Burn After Reading and not feel bad about it. Perhaps they do and are just cashing checks, which is something that I completely understand, but that doesn’t make it right.

Artest and Rethinking the Playoffs

2009-05-10T19:56:00.000-07:00

I love the way that Ron Artest plays defense and it’s weird that he’s such a big guy who can move as fluidly as he can. I do not like his offensive game, such as it is, because he has no regard for what a good shot is. If he did, he wouldn’t launch contested threes or force simply horrible shots with time left on the shot clock and when he’s got other players on his team capable of actually hitting shots (really, anyone else on the team). But I love this anecdote that he told the other day when asked about rough play in the Houston, L.A. series:

In brushing off the idea that the Rockets-Lakers series had
gotten uncomfortably rough, Ron Artest even related a story about a playground
game that ended when someone broke a leg off a table and stabbed a
guy.

“It went right through his heart and he died right on the
court,” Artest said. “So I’m accustomed to playing basketball really
rough.”
It turns out the story is true – although it happened at a
YMCA, the stabbing was in the back and Artest was only 12 at the time, so he
probably wasn’t in the game. The man who died, Lloyd Newton, was from Artest’s
hometown of Queens.

Here’s the story of the stabbing.

When I was watching the game where he got tossed for rushing Kobe and telling him that he was hitting the wrong person, I kept thinking, “I wonder if Ron is going to come back onto the court, put a 38 to Kobe’s temple while he’s shooting a free throw, and squeeze.” Admitedly, it’s highly unlikely that he’d do that or even attempt to do that, but not completely out of the realm of possibility, afterall, some dude stabbed Monica Seles during a tennis match.

Also, given what has transpired the last few days, I clearly need to rethink my prediction on the Lakers. If they make it out of this round against Houston, and I still think that they will. How in the world are they going to tussle against Denver? That team is playing great basketball and has highly effective role players (Nene, Birdman, Blake Griffin 1.0, Dahntay Jones) to go along with Melo, Chauncey, and the extraordinarily knuckleheaded but equally extraordinarily talented J.R. Smith. They’re playing good defense and will have several days to rest after possibly sweeping Dallas, while L.A. is at 2-2 with Houston. They way that they’re playing right now makes them honest-to-goodness title contenders.

Cleveland looks like a goddamn unstoppable train right now (well, at least LeBron does, both literally and figuratively) but a tough Denver team would by no means be an easy out. If given the option, I’d bet that Cleveland would rather face L.A. than Denver because L.A. does not have anywhere near the thuggish ruggish persona that Denver is strutting right now, and it doesn’t look like an act. L.A. for as talented as they are, still lack any sort of pimp slap mentality. I love Lamar Odom, but I wouldn’t fear him. Kenyon Martin on the other hand would make me soil myself and I’d also be deathly afraid to catch anything from Birdman (e.g. avian flu or just the clap). Plus, add the unreal hostile environment that Kobe will face in Denver and it’s going to be a damn tough series for L.A. if they get there. By the way, that Kobe-the-Rapist thing could go one of two ways. One: he’ll feed off of the negative energy and shut the crowd up by scoring at will and defending like a mother bear. Two: he’ll force everything in order to shut the crowd up but completely shoot his team out of the game while getting pissed at his team at the same time. I’d bet we get to see both sides with scenario two happening first, then scenario one happening at least once.

While I’m not an L.A. fan by any stretch I’d much rather see them face Denver than Houston, so here’s hoping that happens.

Renardo Sidney

2009-05-08T18:18:00.000-07:00

It’s nice to see teams use their heads every once and awhile. Renardo Sidney is a 6’10 hihg school senior forward from LA who recently had his scholarship offer from USC revoked after UCLA did the same. I read about him a few months ago in The New York Times Play Magazine and the singular thing that stuck out about him was that at age 18, he sucks his thumb and carries a woobie with him. Here’s the quote:

“I’ve been sucking my thumb since I was a kid,” he says. “Sometimes, I do it
just to do it. Like, when I’m mad.” He also travels with a lucky blanket. His
father — Renardo the elder — is seated across the table. He chuckles. “It’s a
sheet,” he clarifies.

I'm glad we cleared that up. Evidently he’s, quite literally, a Baby Huey type. He’s one of those kids who has a tremendous amount of baby fat on him to the extent that his face is almost completely round. Scouting reports and hyperbolic articles say that he has natural ability on the court, but reading deeper, the kid seemed to have a gigantic attitude problem and he’s not helped out by what seems to be an overly meddling dad who only enables his bad-attitude kid.

I had my biases against him and then I saw him play in the McDonald’s All-America game and my biases were cemented. I hated this kid’s game. He managed to look lazy in an all-star game, when everyone plays lazily. I didn’t understand why college coach would want him on their team, and now it appears that at least two, UCLA’s Ben Howland and USC’s Tim Floyd, do not. Their decisions make perfect sense to me. I can’t imagine how frustrating it would be to have a 6’10 270 kid on your team who will very likely frustrate you every minute of the day he’s on the court because he has the size and natural ability to be good but plays like a lazy, fat, spoiled, entitled, washed-up YMCA guy

DraftExpress.com had some interesting insight on the kid the other day calling him “Antoine Walker in the later stages of his career.” Not exactly a ringing endorsement. There is no player in the history of the NBA whose game I disliked more than Walker. His insistence of launching 3s to the complete detriment of his team was nauseating. His shimmy shake thing he did was worse. I hated his game in the early stages of his career, but he got much worse over time. The point is Sidney is like that now. At 19. No NBA team should touch him. He’s not worth the roster spot. He will not change his stripes, and if he does, it won’t be for five years or so, in other words, too far down the line for any GM or coach who lobbied to get him to reap the rewards because they will be fired by then. Teams should run away and not look back.

I don’t like hating on kids, but I love hoops, and this guy’s game is utterly detestable. I thought that having LeBron James being the gold standard in basketball these days that the trend would be kids would try and emulate his unselfish, all-around game. Maybe that is happening to some extent, but until some sycophantic members of the media stop deifying dudes like Sidney the LeBronization of the game is not complete.

Leftover NBA Thoughts

2009-05-06T12:57:00.000-07:00

A few lingering thoughts from the extraordinarily entertaining Bulls / Celtics series:

Joakim Noah
People dislike this man and even derisively refer to him as a woman, I guess because he’s got long hair and wears it in a ponytail.

He is brash, he is exuberant, he has possibly one of the ugliest looking shots I’ve ever seen, he has the aforementioned ponytail, and he screams a lot, much to the annoyance of nearly everyone around him, probably even his teammates. If I rooted for the guy, I’d cringe every time he let out a primal scream after a putback dunk or a block. I’d want him to put a lid on it and just play, but that’s not him, and it’s frustrating and annoying. It is definitely easy to hate him.

But here’s why I don’t. He’s a great team player and he makes his team better. He is never going to be an elite or even functional scoring option on a good team because he has no post moves to speak of and he certainly cannot hit a jumper (from any distance) with any degree of consistency. But as a result, he does not do these things because he is very aware of his limitations, which makes him a smart player. He knows his role as a defensive role player, agitator, rebounder, and garbage point collector. In addition to being a savvy player, he also has the benefit of being 6’11, possessing boundless energy, and surprising quickness and agility, all of which makes him very effective. He’s a perfect player for this young Bulls team because they have several other scoring threats so his scoring is not necessary. In fact, if he had the ability to score, it may create discord amongst the team because he would think he needs more shots. He may develop offensively over time, but because he’s so unselfish now, their present team is better for it.

I’m not a fan of his, because I do not like the screaming, but I do appreciate his value and would be pleased to have him on my team, if I had one to root for, and I don’t.

Rajon Rondo
He’s got some interesting qualities. Every time I see him I think of the video game Street Fighter II because he reminds me of Dhalsim, the Indian dude with the crazy long arms and legs. Is Rondo just straight up African American or is there something else going on there? My friend, Chris, thinks that he looks like a good-looking Alien, not an ugly one like Sam Cassel. He’s on to something.

My wife thinks that his face is very feminine, which is also true and made me think of Jaye Davidson, the guy who played the chick in The Crying Game and the sun god Ra in Stargate that could have been super cool but instead was just kind of cool (I blame James Spader). He shares a lot of similarities with that androgynous person. However, I'm not saying that Rondo could slip on a dress and pass for an attractive female. He’s end up looking like ET when Drew Barrymore dolled him up. I find that I’m digging myself a hole here and I don’t mean to disparage Rondo’s looks, but he just looks a lot different than a lot of other brothers out there.

Nevertheless, he’s a wonderful point guard player who I’ve decided is better than Deron Williams right now even if Williams is much, much, much more of a threat with his jumper than Rondo is with his.

That’s not to say that I don’t love Williams’s game; I do, but Rondo looks like he has a sort of indestructibility, defensive prowess, and cocky, bad-assness to him, sort of like GP did back in the day. Taken a step further, GP had a compound-fracture level broken jumper when he started out in the league, just as Rondo does. Jumpers, like bones, can be mended over time (just look at Tony Parker). Attitude and drive are harder, if not impossible, to acquire. Rondo has these qualities already.

Just for fun, here is my top five list of young (meaning under 25) PGs in the league in descending order of my admiration:

Chris Paul, age 24 (May 6, 1985) – despite a horrid performance by his team in the playoffs he is the best. He controls every single thing on the floor. His team was hurt and overmatched against a hungry, tougher team on a mission, who look to be on their way to the conference finals by the way. We’ll see what happens next year and if Byron Scott will be back. There has got to be a bunch of coaches who are more qualified than Scott, of course, if there is a buyout involved, then there are issues here because the ownership is notoriously cheap. I love Paul’s game and he remains at the top of the list for me.
Derrick Rose, age 20 (October 4, 1988) – he’s got all of the ability in the world to be the best and he’s only 20. Like Rondo, his jumper is suspect, but it’s not broke. He just needs to spend a ton of time this offseason working on it. It will come. One nitpicky thing about him that will likely dissipate with age and experience is his eagerness to defer. As good of a ball handler he is, I’d prefer him to dominate the ball more than he does. I also understand that he’s got Ben Gordon on his team who lives to shoot and does so voluminously, and will probably bitch if he doesn’t get his looks. My point is, too often he’ll bring the ball up the court and pass it to Gordon or someone else and then disappear for the remainder of the possession. Look, I know that point guards are supposed to pass, but the pass that I just described doesn’t doing anything, except allow Gordon to dribble around and launch up a shot. I also understand that this may be what Vinny calls in from the sideline, whatever the reason, it shouldn’t happen with the frequency that we see it. Taking the ball out of Rose’s hands does nothing but benefit the defense. It lets them off of the hook. He should penetrate at least 70% of the time because by doing so he’ll get to the rim or he’ll find an open guy. Every time. In a few years, we’ll see this, he is only a rookie and a very young one at that. The bottom line is this: He’s great right now and will only get better.
Rajon Rondo, age 23 (February 22, 1986) – he’s in the three spot solely based on what I’ve seen out of him during these playoffs. He’s been nothing short of fantastic, but his lack of any sort of offensive perimeter game limits him presently.
Deron Williams, age 24 (June 26, 1984) – I’d love to have him on any team I root for. He’s got great size and strength and plays good defense. It’s just that his top-end is below what the other three have to offer.
Russell Westbrook, age 20 (November 12, 1988) – I can only go on what I’ve read about him and what I saw of him at UCLA since I haven’t seen a single game of his. He was an explosive guy and a terrific defender at UCLA and it seems as though that has carried over to the NBA. As an aside, I just looked at their roster and Shaun Livingston is on their team. That poor dude. He was on his way to becoming a very good point guard in the league if he didn’t suffer that dry-heave inducing leg injury (link). That, and looking exactly like Wallace, doomed him. (images). Upon further review, his birthday isn’t helping matters either… September 11, 1985. On the bright side, he’s got two years to be a member of this exclusive list of mine, so there’s that. But really, is Livingston capable of making a comeback? And if so, will the Sonics have the skinniest 1 and 3 east of Serbia? Neither Durant nor Livingston was able to press 185 off of their chests at the NBA Pre-Draft Combine. I’m pulling for the guy to make it back simply because, in limited time, he looked like he had a great feel for the game. He also seemed like a good dude and the league could always use more legit PGs who can see the floor and make plays. Here’s hoping that he continues to round back into shape and not explode on impact.

Guys that didn’t make my list but whom I’ve heard good things about and will try to watch them even though it’s impossible because they are never on TV:

DJ Augsustin, age 21 (November 10, 1987) – I remember him at Texas, and am surprised that he’s been able to do what he has in the NBA, of course he plays in Charlotte (for now) and that team will never be relevant because it’s very likely that their ownership and management don’t know what they’re doing. Plus, I hate the sanctimonious Larry Brown
O.J. Mayo, age 21 (November 5, 1987) – I’m told that he’s a point guard. I don’t know how that is the case. When he was at USC he didn’t really play the point, but he did have the ball a lot. He’s also got Mike Conley on the team, whose strength is not shooting. If I cared about Memphis in the least I’d put more thought into this. Mayo just seems like he fits the trendy combo guard label than point guard, but does that really matter? All of those combo guards can all thank Chauncey for this, by the way.

Guys that I’m interested in, but probably only because they are from the Seattle area and don’t have the special gifts that the top five have but I’m going to mention them anyway because I am intrigued by them and they are still young and this is my site and I’ll do what I want.

Aaron Brooks, age 24 (January 14, 1985) – He’s incredibly quick, but small, and has a great jumper. I see no reason why he shouldn’t be Jason Terry for years to come (yes, I made that reference because they both are from the same high school in Seattle, but you have to admit, it works).
Rodney Stuckey, age 23 (April 21, 1986) – Not overly impressive, but he’ll get better. He’s physically gifted and has great size. I’m very intrigued by his potential. People ought to settle down with the Dwyane Wade comparisons. Just because he resembles him physically doesn’t mean he’s the same player. He has attributes, but Wade is super duper special. Stuckey can also thank Chauncey (for the combo guard thing and also for the leaving Detroit thing).

The Derby

2009-05-04T12:59:00.000-07:00

I watched the ponies run this weekend with some good friends over beers and pizza. Someone asked this hypothetical question: “Would you rather go to the Kentucky Derby or the Indy 500?” Since none of us are fans of racing, equine or automobile, we all understood that the venue’s atmosphere would be the only thing to consider. More specifically, we were interested in the talent-level and attire of the spectators. At least for me, this question is best posed to the single, early-to-mid twenties me as opposed to the married, about to have a kid, mid-thirties me.

That being said, we all picked the Derby.

As NBC scanned the crowd, we saw a lot of dresses and big hats. The really disappointing aspect of the Derby, at least this year, was the weather. As we all know, hot, sunny weather (and scores of Mint Juleps) brings out the weaponry. Because of the rain, it seemed, to me anyway, that the crowd held back a bit. Don’t get me wrong, we still saw some things that still enticed us to go, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel letdown.

Maybe we’ll get together during the Indy 500 to see what there is to see there. As I said on Saturday, I’d expect to see a lot of Daisy Duke-esque jean shorts with the insides of the front pockets visibly sticking out. Tube tops and half shirts would also rule the day. Hmmm. Why did we all choose the Derby again? I guess that’s not fair because I’m told the infield in both places sport the same cast of characters. I suppose the difference I’m speaking about are in the actual seats (or luxury boxes in Kentucky).

There’s another element at work here that goes hand-in-hand with the talent issue that may increase or decrease your level of viewing enjoyment. That element is the talent’s date, otherwise known as husband or boyfriend of the talent. Answer me this, of these two profiles who are you more afraid of?

Drunk guy (off of Busch Light), age 22-35, crappy manual labor job, wearing 501s and an Urlacher jersey, sunburned, mad at the world, jealous of everyone.

Drunk guy (off of life and Mint Juleps), age 40-50, mutual fund manager (they still get paid, a lot), wearing a seersucker suit, spa-treatment skin, pleased with himself and his place in the world, apathetic (at best) toward everyone.

I’d fear No. 1 simply because he’s got absolutely nothing to lose by picking a fight with you for looking in the direction of his “special lady.” No. 2 would probably be so distracted by the scent of his own cash that he wouldn’t even notice if you switched hats with his date. Also, it’s likely that you could simply give No. 2 two for flinching, of course, he may have bodyguards, which changes things, but only slightly. Edge to the Derby, yet again.

Incidentally, I demand to know why NBC didn’t find out the reason behind Michael Jordan’s suit and why didn’t we get a full body shot on TV. We saw that preposterous jacket and tie, but we never got to see the suit in its full shoulder to feet glory. That thing looked like it came from Leroy’s Menswear on 3rd and Pike in Seattle.

One last thing about the race, which was interesting, but maybe due more to the jockey than the actual race itself. First, are all jockeys cocky? I don’t know who Calvin Borel was pointing at, but I’d like to think he was doing the equivalent of a Deion Sanders high stepping to the end zone. If so, god bless Calvin Borel because that was awesome. There’s nothing like a 4’10 guy telling other 4’10 guys that they can’t touch this.

Speaking of Borel, does he or does he not look like Gollum? My buddy Kevin and I thought of that at the same time on Saturday. I vote yes, but with a few caveats. Gollum may have been taller. Gollum clearly has upper teeth, whereas it’s unclear if Borel has any. I could understand Gollum a little more clearly than I can understand Borel; his animated Cajun twang was nearly indecipherable. One last thing, Chris noted that in addition to Gollum, he looks like the late Jim Varney of Earnest Goes to __ fame. By the way, take a look at how many of those Earnest movies were made That’s a startling amount of films for something so preposterous. One last thing about the broadcast, aside from the Olympic gymnastics, Bob Costas must love covering horseracing. These are the only times when he completely dwarf his interview subjects.

BT

2009-05-01T12:51:00.000-07:00

It's impossible for me not to pile on here, so here goes, what else are we going to find out about A-Rod in the coming months?

How great is it that he has “rounded pectoral muscles” so much so that his Yankee teammates call him “bitch tits”? I thought steroids helped guys look more muscular and manly. It's news to me that it makes guys resemble women. We all know about the shrinking testicle thing, but this A-Rod story has brought new stuff to light. Steroid dealers must leave out that part when slangin roids to their junkies.

Dealer: “Yeah, these will get you really pumped up.”
Junkie: “So, will my pecs get really huge if I use this stuff?”
Dealer: (suppressing laughter): “Yeah. Definitely.”

As an aside, just look at that picture. I mean really look at it. It's too perfect.

The BT term has been tossed around to fatter dudes for quite some time. I first heard the term in college and it was appropriate for some guys. For all I know, they could have been roided up and couldn’t very well confess to that (either that, or they were just fat and sloppy).

Back to A-Rod, what else is there? Was he selling credit default swaps? Was he an advisor to Bernie Madoff? Did he bring the swine flu to the U.S.? Has he been secretly arming the insurgents in Iraq? Did he waterboard detainees? Was he behind the sale of the Sonics to Clay Bennett? Did he hurt Tiger’s knee? Did he kill that guy’s mom in “Slumdog Millionaire”? Was he a consultant for George Lucas on the prequels? Did he turn Lindsay Lohan? Was he filming hand signals? Did he kill Tupac and Biggie?

All of the above are possible. What’s also possible is that A-Rod may not be human. It’s unclear what evil forces are behind his creation, but some nefarious beings are pulling the strings and it’s getting out of hand. It’s too bad Arnold is busy running California (into the ground) because we could really use Douglas Quaid, John Matrix, Ben Richards, Dutch, or even Detective John Kimble to get to the bottom of this.

Leroy

2009-05-01T12:35:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I absolutely love being wrong. This is one of those times. I’m floored that the Hawks were able to sign Hill. It looks like Hill meant it when he said he’d love to stay in Seattle. He wanted to stay here and it looks like he got a very reasonable deal. The reported number is 6 years 38M with over 15.5M guaranteed. That looks like a very fair deal for both sides. Hill is a hell of a player who deserves that payday. The Hawks also need him so that they’re able to do what they want to do defensively.

By waiting until after the draft and after most free agency money has been snatched up, the Hawks essentially screwed Hill by giving him no chance to sign elsewhere for big dollars. Ruskell knew this and was banking on him not signing elsewhere out of spite. It was a huge risk and he would have been absolutely ridiculed and vilified if Hill left, but he didn’t and that’s why he sits where he does and I sit here with my thumb up my ass.

But that doesn’t mean that Ruskell is not to be questioned. We don’t know if Ruskell is the least bit influenced by fans and the media, but it’s clear that the public outcry was “We Can’t Lose Leroy Hill.” If that outcry affected his decision to sign Hill, even to the most minute degree, then the spouting off, premature worrying, and doomsday scenarios were worth it. I will gladly look like a fool if the result benefits the team that I root for.

The team is shaping up, on the defensive side of the ball anyway, quite nicely.

DE: Kerney. Please don’t be hurt. It would be very nice to see him make it through the entire year creating havoc on a consistent basis. They need him to be destructive.
DE: Redding? Tapp? Jackson? What is up with Daryl Tapp? Is he simply not that talented because of his size? He had a monster four-sack game against St. Louis in ’07, but that’s highly skewed because St. Louis had one of the worst offensive lines in the game. It seems very likely that they don’t trust the guy to do the job and that he won’t be here much longer. I had high hopes for him, but the coaching staff doesn’t seem to. Who knows what to expect of Jackson, he didn’t show much during his rookie year, but he’s got size and ability so the book is still out on him. I actually thought that Redding was a DT when they traded for him because of his size (6’4 295) and he seems like a weird fit as a DE in a 4-3 alignment, but whatever.
DT: Mebane. I love what I’ve seen out of this guy in his first few years. He was a great find in the third round and we’re lucky to have him. Rocky Bernard was fine, but not at any meaningful salary number.
DT: Cole? Bryant? No idea what to expect out of these guys. They are both huge guys who will plug up holes and keep linemen off of the LBs.
OLB: Curry. My man crush on Curry is in full effect. From a “good dude” perspective, he’s off of the charts. From a football player perspective, I only know what I’ve been told and seen in the highlights because I never saw Wake Forest play (a club that includes nearly everyone outside of the ACC). I choose to believe what people are telling me. Someone said that they reminded him of Julian Peterson. That seems like a very lazy comparison. For one, their body types are very different. Peterson was two inches taller (6’3 compared to 6’1) and weighed about 15 lbs less (240 compared to 254). Peterson is ripped like no one’s business, but he’s a more sinewy, athletic looking guy whereas Curry looks a lot more bulky and compact. I see Curry as more effective against the run with the ability to cover probably better than Peterson (in addition to being heavier, Curry is also faster than Peterson, at least timed faster 4.56 compared to 4.7). My hopes are dangerously high for this guy.
MLB: Tatupu. Love him. Don’t have much more to say about him.
OLB: Hill(!). See above. I’m ecstatic.
CB: Trufant. He played well last year, but will be even better this year with Lucas on the other side. They are a great duo.
CB: Lucas. Great signing for a cheap salary. They completely lucked into him. Also, I doubt very seriously that Nate Burleson will punch him in the face.
SS: Grant. I still like this guy. Big hitter and great leader from all accounts.
FS: Russell. I am unbelievably down on this guy. I can see very easily the young buck from Rutgers, Courtney Greene, beating him out. He didn’t make plays in the run or pass game and was massively disappointing. They need to upgrade here.

I’m looking forward to reading the reports out of minicamp this weekend.

Now, Ruskell, please get Curry into camp on time. I’m begging you. A training camp holdout would be akin to submerging my testicles in an ice bath.

Jeremy Tyler

2009-04-29T13:03:00.000-07:00

I love this Jeremy Tyler story that I first read here and then subsequently here, here, and here.

From a “what the hell?” standpoint, I love that Olden Polynice was a volunteer coach on Tyler’s high school team. O.P. was on some spectacularly mediocre Sonics teams in the late 80s and I’ll never forget him. I remember going to a game when I was 15, looking at the program, and thinking that there was something wrong with his face, and then feeling sorry for him. Not that how he looks had anything to do with his ability to play hoops, but it’s the singular thing that I remember about him. He was never a horrible player and was certainly better than the cavalcade of Rich King-like stiffs the Sonics subjected us to over the years.

On a national level, I’m guessing that O.P. was best known for one of two things:

His arrest for impersonating a police officer
Getting traded on draft day from Chicago to Seattle for Scottie Pippen

Number two is especially galling on a personal level. I would have liked a core of Gary Payton, Scottie Pippen, and Shawn Kemp a great deal. Um, that probably would have been a decent defensive squad. Of course, Pippen may never have blossomed into Pippen if not for Jordan, but it’s very likely that he would have thrived alongside The Glove and the Reign Man… sigh… anyway, it looks like O.P. was the key ingredient (aside from Jordan) in the Bulls Dynasty.

Getting back to O.P.’s influence on Tyler, I really enjoyed this part of the article:

"Still, Polynice disagrees with Tyler’s decision to go to Europe. He said Tyler was being 'pimped;' he would not elaborate."

So O.P. just called Tyler a whore, which is a very nice thing to say about someone. Also, O.P. was never known for his work ethic, so it’s always funny to me when a guy like that gets to have any influence whatsoever on young people. For instance, when O.P was finishing his third tour of duty with the Sonics in the lockout shortened ’98-’99 season (otherwise known as the “Vin Baker Fattening Project”) and shooting an ungodly 30% from the free throw line he was routinely seen practicing half court shots at practice instead of working on parts of his game that might help the team.

O.P. comedy aside, it’s a very interesting story. Brandon Jennings’s story was and is fascinating because he was bypassing Arizona (who really could have used him this year) to play for cash in Italy. I loved that he was doing it because it sounded like he wasn’t going to qualify to play college ball and he wanted to stay sharp, learn some skills, and get paid. I mean, why not? I loved the Josh Childress story as well because he was being held hostage by the NBA restricted free agent rules and decided to exercise his options, as a free man in society, to do what he pleased, and get paid more for doing it. Good for him.

Now here comes young Jeremy Tyler and his decision to go to Europe and bypass his senior year in high school along the way. Every time I hear about a kid who leaves high school early (like the football players to enroll for the spring semester at Universities to take part in spring practices), I can’t help but think, “why would you want to leave high school early? I had fun in high school, especially my senior year.” Then I snap back to reality and realize that their lives and my life as a high schooler are slightly different. They’re going to be playing big time sports in college or the pros and I was going to run track in the spring and miss going to the state meet because I wasn’t good enough. I guess that’s different.

From what I understand, Tyler is going to leave school, but take online courses or be homeschooled, so he’ll still get his high school diploma. So what’s the big deal? Doesn’t this happen all of the time but we just don’t know about it or don’t care? Don’t child actors do this all of the time? The SI article pointed to entertainers who leave school early and finish elsewhere. The ESPN article talked about tennis and golf players who do this with regularity. I don’t get what the big deal is. Why the hand-wringing? Why the concern?

ESPN’s Doug Gottlieb, arguing that Tyler’s decision to go abroad said the following:

"If it is acceptable for Tyler to leave high school after his junior year to play professionally, when does it not become OK to leave? Tyler is setting a dangerous precedent by making this move. What about a sophomore or a freshman making a similar decision? Why even have high school at all?"

A few things here:

I’m not sure who needs to “accept” that Tyler could leave high school. It’s of no one’s concern but his and maybe his parents. It’s not a question of it being acceptable or “OK” for him to do this. He, or anyone else, can do this whenever the hell he feels like it.
This “dangerous” precedent-setting decision that Tyler is making is, again, of no one’s concern but his. Does he have some sort of obligation to anyone else but himself? Is he supposed to “think of the children”? If he wants to do this, then he should do this. If it affects someone else’s decision down the line, is that really on him? And if it does, does it matter?
Gottlieb asks, “Why even have high school at all?” I have the same question myself and am planning on writing about this at a later date. If these guys want to pursue their dreams of playing basketball and who also don’t care about school (I’m making assumptions here, but by and large if a guy leaves after one year in college or, previously, skipped college altogether, then they aren’t very interested in school… I’m just sayin’) then why should they go to school?

Aside from the obvious ethnocentric (scared of the European sports system) and racist stuff at work here (again, no worries about tennis/golf academies, entertainers, or foreign athletes who do this same thing) there is another element that doesn’t get mentioned and that’s the nationwide high school graduation rates for African Americans hovers around the mid 50% range every year. From what we know, Tyler is going to graduate from high school. What about the millions of kids who do not graduate from high school and who are not immensely talented basketball players? Where is the outcry about the education of these kids? Kids drop out of school at alarming rates and those that do earn far less than their cohorts that do earn their diplomas. Tyler is leaving high school, but plans on graduating, and is getting a head start on a potentially lucrative career.

People lament that kids are lazy and don’t take advantage of the opportunities that are provided to them. We get upset when someone doesn’t maximize his potential and make use of his talents. Well, Tyler’s talent is in basketball. He’s making a professional decision to do what he thinks is best for him.

Is it sketchy that Sonny Vaccaro is involved? Sure. But how is this any less seedy than college programs hiring a big-time recruit’s AAU coach or someone affiliated with that player with the hope that doing so will land them that recruit.

I mean, please. Stop with the goddamn hypocrisy already. Whether we agree or disagree with his decision is of no consequence. The teeth gnashing is insincere.

Overemphasis on Big Guys

2009-04-28T18:03:00.000-07:00

I alluded to this point in the previous post, but to reiterate, teams, the media, and fans tend to inflate the importance of big guys in the draft and through free agency (power forwards and centers). That’s not to say that when a clearly superior big guy is available that a team shouldn’t take him. Guys that come to mind are Hakeem Olajuwon, Patrick Ewing, David Robinson, Shaq, Chris Webber, (come on, we all thought he’d be awesome), Tim Duncan, maybe Yao Ming, and Dwight Howard. Those guys are easy picks. They were considered franchise-changing talents, and for the most part they lived up to their billing.

The promise of the above guys are what lead teams astray. They see a guy like Greg Oden and try to forecast him into one of the guys who were franchise changers. They compare him to David Robinson because he’s a nice guy, he’s physically huge, he can block shots, and he has a “raw” (read: massively underdeveloped) offensive game. It’s not Oden’s fault that he’s not as good as everything thinks he should be or that he’s suffered injury after injury and will be arthritic prematurely. It’s just that we love to project big guys into stardom when they don’t really deserve it. I’m particularly sensitive to the big guy love affair because the Sonics, for three miserable drafts in a row, picked “raw” seven-foot “projects” early in the first round. From Robert Swift (picture him wearing all black, sitting in the back of a classroom looking sullen, and tell me you’re not thinking to yourself “Is the quickest way out of here through the window or do I try and bolt for the door?” – I realize that it’s the 10th anniversary of Columbine and that Virginia Tech was not long ago, and that it's completely insensitive and inappropriate, but when I see Robert Swift, I see that kind of kid, I can’t help it. I'm sorry.), to Johan “I’m as soft as an éclair” Petro, to Mohammed “I have no earthly idea how to play basketball, but I’m tall” Sene. I’m sure they are all nice enough guys, but they will never be a reason that a team wins a playoff series in the NBA. They are seven foot albatrosses and they litter the NBA landscape. Big guys like this linger at the ends of benches year after year. They have different names, but they are all the same player. Tall guys who don’t have any basketball skills who costs teams far too much money and are taking up spots that should go to talented players who are six inches shorter, but several times more valuable in terms of actually playing and winning games.

It’s unfair to lump all big guys who are non-stars into this category. Not all big guys are complete wastes of space. Some non-star big guys actually contribute in many ways because they bring things to the table. Guys that fit this mold, in the playoffs are Cleveland’s Anderson Varejao, Chicago’s Joakim Noah, New Orleans’s Tyson Chandler (when not injured), LA’s Andrew Bynum, Boston’s Kendrick Perkins, Philly’s Sam Dalembert (although he costs way too much, at least he plays), Dallas’s Erick Dampier (same comments as Dalembert), Portland’s Joel Przybilla, and Atlanta’s Zaza Pachulia. These guys actually bring things to the table and are useful, but not vital parts of their teams. Quite honestly, most teams could probably get by without having them at all except on the nights that they face an actually talented big guy, of which there are very, very, very few in the league.

I feel bad for big guys because oftentimes we hear stories about them where they sort of fell into hoops because they were tall and someone convinced them to play, so they played and are now making loads of money (so I don’t feel too bad for them) because of this genetic freakiness. Because a guy is tall and because there are guys who exist (the aforementioned superior big guys) who are great, we lump them together. We wonder why our big guy can’t simply get the ball in the post, turn to the center or baseline, and drop a jump hook through the hoop. We ask, “What’s so hard about that?” or say, “He’s seven-feet tall, why can’t he do that?” The answer is, “He’s not good.” A big guy will disappoint teams, media, and fans more than he will please them. We believe that all big guys are unstoppable because they physically resemble Olajuwon, when in fact they’re just tall and not special beyond that. Anyway, I’m not anti-big guy, but I do feel that a team should only acquire one for specific purposes. Some non-exhaustive purposes are:

1. If he’s a definite star (a la Tim Duncan)
2. You need a big guy for your definite star to beat up in practice
3. You need a big guy to sub into games to give your definite star a break or if he’s in foul trouble
4. When traveling, you want to make it abundantly clear that you are a basketball team
5. The big guy is young and you see promise, but only if you’re going to draft him very low and only if you have someone to teach him how to do big guy stuff

Drafting a big guy is like drafting a quarterback in the NFL. There is a big risk/reward ratio to work out. NBA teams often need quality big guys and NFL teams often need quality QBs for the same reason: there are only so many to go around. But teams make mistakes in both leagues when they project a player to be someone he’s not because a true big man/QB star isn’t there. The Detroit Lions may have made this error by picking Matthew Stafford (although he may be good) and the Portland Trailblazers definitely made this mistake when drafting Oden over Durant. For what Portland is doing, Przybilla fits them fine and Channing Frye could be playing Oden’s minutes as a backup. He’s more than capable even if he is a less-talented Aldridge. Portland with Durant on board would be a nasty, nearly unguardable team. As it is, they have Oden, who, again through no fault of his own, is placed in a position where he has so many expectations heaped on him. He’s never going to come close to reaching those expectations and it’s more likely that he’ll fall far short of them. It’s too bad, really.

If I was running a team I would continually value basketball IQ, skill, and ability above size. Always. I would keep rolling the best damn 6’7 and under team in the league unless and until a truly dominant big guy became available either through the draft, trade, or free agency. Why waste a pick (and money) on a big guy that you know damn well is not as talented and can help your team less than a swingman who has actual basketball skills? For example, I’d rather have DeMar DeRozan on my team than Hasheem Thabeet. Yes, I realize that Thabeet is a great shot blocker, but he’s a train wreck with the ball in his hands, whereas DeRozan has the talent and ability to develop into a super-duper star. Thabeet will never be a star, and it’s a virtual guarantee that he’s going to have some sort of weird injury directly related to being 7’3. I’d bet money on that if I could (and if I had any money to bet…).

Just for fun, here is a list of the teams in the playoffs and a list of the players who play vital roles determining the outcome for their team. For example, if Derrick Rose and Ben Gordon both have great games, then there is a more than likely chance that the Bulls are going to win. If they both have terrible games, then there is a more than likely chance that the Bulls are going to lose. If Brad Miller or Joakim Noah has a great or terrible game, then it’s doubtful that their performance will have much to do with the outcome of the game.

The playoff teams
Boston: Paul Pierce, Ray Allen Rajon Rondo, Kevin Garnett (not playing)
Chicago: Derrick Rose, Ben Gordon
Orlando: Dwight Howard (maybe), Rashard Lewis, Hedo Turkolu, Courtney Lee, Rafer Alston
Philly: Andre Iguodala, Thaddeus Young, Sam Dalembert
Atlanta: Joe Johnson, Mike Bibby
Miami: Dwyane Wade
Detroit: Rip Hamilton, Rodney Stuckey, Rasheed Wallace
Cleveland: LeBron James, Mo Williams, Big Z
LA Lakers: Kobe Bryant, Pau Gasol, Lamar Odom
Utah: Deron Williams, Carlos Boozer
San Antonio: Tony Parker, Tim Duncan, Manu Ginobili (when playing)
Dallas: Dirk Nowitski, Jason Kidd, Jason Terry
Portland: Brandon Roy, LaMarcus Aldridge
Houston: Yao Ming, Ron Artest (kind of)
Denver: Chauncey Billups, Carmelo Anthony
New Orleans: Chris Paul, David West

Based on this self-serving list I’ve created here are the numbers:

Non-Bigs: 27
Bigs: 15 (and I included Rashard Lewis, Thaddeus Young, Dirk Nowitski, Lamar Odom, and David West in this group, even though they play more like guards than forwards)

What’s my point?

My point is that non-bigs determine the outcome of NBA playoff teams than bigs do. It’s a fact. Having a “dominant” big man does not determine success in the NBA. It’s pretty evident that Dwight Howard is the most gifted big out there right now. And where is that going to get Orlando? An appearance in the second round of the playoffs? Maybe the third? Maybe as Howard grows, he’ll lead his team out of “almost there” status. But, and be honest here, do you really see it? He’s awesome right now at what he does, but do you see him getting any better than he is? Do you see his game progressing to incorporate a great, consistent hook or jumper? I don’t. It’s not like he can’t get there, I just don’t know that he will get there. I do know this though, I’d choose LeBron, Kobe, CP3, and Wade over him.

This is my really, really, really roundabout way of telling you that I would absolutely draft Ricky Rubio over Blake Griffin in the upcoming draft and not feel the least bit bad about it. I’ve seen Rubio play (albeit in short stints) and the guy is fantastic. Also, since he’s a guard, he will be in a position to dominate the ball and make decisions. Griffin can’t do much except be explosive and finish around the rim, which is great, but he seems more like a complementary player than a star player. Rubio is a star and has been in the professional ranks for years. He won’t be phased in the least and will thrive in any system. I love the kid and can’t wait to see him play here.

NBA Playoffs

2009-04-28T17:34:00.000-07:00

As much as I love the NBA playoffs, we can all agree that they stretch the games out too long. I mean, each team has only played four games and it’s been like two weeks. It’s no wonder the playoffs take two months to finish. I fully understand why the system is the way it is, the NBA and the TV corporations are attempting to maximize their dollars. I get that, but do we really need a best of seven series for every series? I loved the best of five format that we had in the first round (with the notable exception of the ’94 playoffs when the Sonics had the look of a championship-caliber team and lost to the goddamn Nuggets).

I doubt very seriously that they’ll revert to a five-game series in the first round, despite how much people would actually like it. People would love an NFL Playoffs vibe even more because any team can beat any other team if they’re both good on any night. The NCAA Tournament captures this as well, and that’s what makes it so special. The beauty of the postseason generally is the win-or-go-home mentality. It’s so much fun to watch these games because the finality ratchets up the intensity.

Contrast that with the win-four-times-or-go-home mentality of the NBA playoffs. Not quite as exciting is it? Of course elimination games are fun and game sevens are incredible to watch, but we just have to wait so damn long to get there. I suppose they’re worth the wait though. Also, the best team usually will prevail in a seven-game series, which is somewhat satisfying. It’s pretty uncommon for an inferior team to beat a clearly superior team in a seven-game series. It’s just too hard to hide weaknesses and unless certain players on an inferior team are just treeing for an entire series, that team is typically going to lose. There are exceptions, of course, but the better team usually prevails, not that it matters in the least, unless you have rooting interest, in which case then it definitely matters.

While I’m complaining about the length of these playoffs, I’ve definitely been interested. Since I work for a living and have a wife who would threaten, and probably follow through with, murder if I watched every single game that’s on TV, I have to pick and choose which games to watch, and even then, it’s hard. Plus, it’s nice outside now and it makes it very difficult to justify sitting inside when it’s 70 degrees and sunny. That’s what happens when you live in the Seattle area, I spend at least half of my time bitching about the weather, so when it’s finally tolerable to be outside, I must go outside, games be damned. But that’s what DVR is for, if I’m willing to stay up until 3:00 a.m. to pound out all of the games.

Back to the subject, there are only two of these series that I’ve dubbed appointment TV. Chicago v. Boston and Houston v. Portland.

Chicago and Boston
I’m heavily intrigued by the Bulls and Derrick Rose and their mighty rise from freaking nowhere, so I’m enthralled by that series. I’m somewhat invested in the Blazers solely because of Brandon Roy, and tangentially interested in the Rockets because of Aaron Brooks; Seattle ballplayers, both of them. I guess, for the same reason, I should care about Atlanta (Marvin Williams), Detroit (Rodney Stuckey), and Dallas (Jason Terry), but I don’t, at least not as much because those other three series just aren’t as interesting. Houston and Portland, beyond the Seattle connection, is a very interesting matchup because Houston hasn’t gotten out of the first round in forever and Portland is making its first trip back in forever. Both teams are talented and could do some damage to LA. The series has produced some very close games, but sadly, it looks like Houston is going to take this, and that’s a damn shame considering how good Portland has looked at times. That said, if not for Ron Artest attempting to shoot his team out of the playoffs, Houston would have beaten Portland by at least 10 the other night, instead of winning a close one down the stretch.

Chicago and Boston, on the other hand, has been an otherworldly series. Taking a step back, it looked like Chicago was headed this way a few years ago when they made the playoffs and looked good. They had a young, talented team that was hungry and making noise. But then they got greedy, trade rumors were swirling, they started to hate their coach (more), and eventually fell on their face. Then they ass backward into Rose and everything changed.

Rose, simply put, is amazing. I fawn over him. He will be legitimately discussed as the best player in the league within five years, easily. I doubt that he (or anyone else) will ever dethrone LeBron while he’s in his prime (that would be NOW until about 9 or 10 years from now), but Kobe Bryant (who is probably too old for this discussion) Rose, Chris Paul, Dwyane Wade, Dwight Howard, Kevin Durant, Brandon Roy, Deron Williams, and maybe Carmelo Anthony will be contenders for ‘Bron’s crown. Of course, Ricky Rubio, John Wall, and some other young bucks may storm the castle too. We just don’t know if they’ll get hit by the cauldron of oil or make it through the gate yet.

Orlando and Philly
The other games don’t interest me as much. Orlando and Philly has some intrigue, but I don’t care about either team. I like Orlando a little bit because Rashard Lewis plays for them and he was always a decent guy here in Seattle. Dwight Howard is fun to watch because he’s looks so strangely huge amongst huge people. Plus, he’s abundantly talented, but ultimately flawed because he really can’t be counted on yet. I’d love to see him put it all together and become a 35 point scorer. He could easily do that if he shot 75% from the free throw line, but somehow I doubt he’ll ever approach that mark. Philly is kind of interesting, but ultimately how can I even dedicate any time to a team that has killed itself with that horrible Elton Brand signing? They’re doomed for years and it was their own damn fault. Why bail out the Clippers like that? I do like Thaddeus Young, though. The kid seems like a very solid player and I will forever like Andre Igudola for the singular reason that he nearly decapitated himself in a dunk contest. So I like some individuals on those teams, but neither one has a legit shot at winning the title or even pushing a team very much (no, Orlando has no shot) so I’m uninterested ultimately.

San Antonio and Dallas
San Antonio and Dallas couldn’t bore me more. There is no chance I’ll watch any part of that series. I’m dog tired of San Antonio and have been for years, I’d really prefer it if both of these teams would just exit out of the playoffs after this series is over, sort of like an instant double elimination, but without having to lose twice… wait, that doesn’t make any sense. Maybe it’s a single elimination spread over two teams simultaneously. Whatever. I just don’t want to see either one advance, despite Jason Terry’s excellence.

Atlanta and Miami
Atlanta and Miami presents two young teams who may be on their way to better things, but probably not. I haven’t seen anything but the highlights of this series and I doubt they’ll make it into the regular rotation. I am interested to see how Michael Beasely plays, since I haven’t seen one minute of him this year, but I suspect I’ll be underwhelemed. Is it just me, or do people get way, way, way to proud of big guys? How could he ever have been considered by any team over Derrick Rose? He had a rep for being a lazy, immature dude prior to the draft, but he could score and rebound. Rose had a rep for being emotionally invested in the outcomes of games, being massively unselfish, and possessing unspeakable talent and played maybe the most important position on the team, depending on the offense a team runs. This isn’t revisionist history. He’s always been the better player. Whatever, I’m just saying that teams and the media over-emphasize “big” guys. A point I’ll get to in a separate post.

I guess I was talking about the Atlanta/Miami series. I’m somewhat interested in this Hawks team because they seem to be properly constructed with some really good young players and they finally have a point guard who can do some things for them in Nougat All-Star Mike Bibby. I just can’t get into them. Hopefully they’ll advance and I’ll get to check them out in the next round.

Denver and New Orleans
Before I say anything here, I’ve got to start with the following number: 58. It’s amazing that a team with Chris Paul, David West, James Posey, and Tyson Chandler would lose by fifty eight points. Those guys are legitimately good players who are extremely prideful, it’s striking to me that they’d roll over like that. At home. To a Denver team that is good, but certainly not whip-your-ass-on-an-historic level good. I’ve read that there are issues (to put it mildly) with Byron Scott as a coach. Yahoo!’s Adrian Wojnarowski, wrote about it today. ESPN’s Bill Simmons has written about it earlier this year after watching Scott and Paul’s interaction (if it can be called that) live at a Clippers game. I don’t understand how, as a coach at the highest level of sport, Byron Scott could be unprepared and pay little attention to detail. Is it that difficult to do? Do you not have various scouts and assistant coaches informing you of things or do you simply choose not to listen? The whole thing confuses me. Why not be prepared even if you don’t manically control every part of the game (like Larry Brown or Avery Johnson), at least have an answer for things if whatever gameplan that you’ve cooked up isn’t working. How the hell is a player supposed to respect a coach who doesn’t put in the time to help his team perform to the best of its ability, especially when the players are busting their asses? If Byron Scott is truly the way that he’s portrayed, then how in the hell is he still the coach of a team like New Orleans with the best point guard in the game? I’m glad I’m not a New Orleans fan (although, as I’ve stated in the past I will gladly, if not gleefully, accept their team as the new Sonics).

As for the series itself, aside from the last game, it didn’t really look like New Orleans had a shot. Denver has been playing too well and Chauncey Billups has been rubbing New Orleans players’ faces in their own feces, and then swatting them with a rolled up magazine all series. He’s been unstoppable. He was great in Detroit, but he’s been incredible for Denver. He’s been hitting his shots, which had been a missing ingredient in his game in the post-championship years in Detroit. Plus, there is the whole hometown thing going for him. I love seeing guys get a chance to play where they grew up, there’s just something cool about that.

Another thing that Denver has working for it is their cumulative ink. I defy you to find me a team who sports more tats than these Nuggets. It’s not just the amount of tats they have, but the shocking amount of surface area that these tats cover. J.R. Smith is literally wearing long sleeves, Kenyon Martin has been tagged by a “writer” from the Bronx, and the Birdman looks like an entire grade school pelted him with Easter eggs and Fun Dip.

Speaking of the Birdman, just because you were once down-and-out as a drug-addled idiot does not mean you must continue to look the part. He’s the latter day Rodman, right down to the hustle and annoyance factors. How soon until he dons a wedding gown to marry himself? Although, he’s so militantly ugly that I doubt he has the stomach to even masturbate, let alone be his own bride.

Los Angeles and Utah
I’m beginning to wonder if anyone, even Cleveland, is going to beat this Lakers team. They are pissing on Utah, and while Utah is an eight seed, they’re not a garden-variety eight seed. They have talented players with great size, a good coach, and a great home court advantage. But this Lakers team is frightening. It’s insane that they can legitimately roll out a lineup like this:

Center: Bynum: 7’0
Power Forward: Gasol: 7’0
Small Forward: Ariza: 6’7
Shooting Guard: Bryant: 6’7
Point Guard: Odom: 6’10

That’s preposterous. Not only is this lineup huge, but it's highly skilled. Odom is more than capable of bringing the ball up and setting up the offense just as Ariza and Kobe are capable of guarding smaller players. This eliminates the Lakers’s weakness at the PG spot and pretty much guarantees that they’ll get nearly every rebound. If the Lakers lose more than twice the rest of the way in the Western Conference I’ll be surprised.

I don’t have much to say about Utah except that I don’t understand why you’d live there unless you love skiing and are Mormon. Why else would you bother? But I will say this, they’ve made a great uniform switch over the years. Their present gear is pretty awesome. Good job there, guys.

Detroit and Cleveland
Everytime I watch LeBron play I feel like Anton Ego, the restaurant critic in “Ratatouille,” when he takes his first bite of the dish of the same name at the end of the movie.

LeBron is so mesmerizing it makes me weep and transports me to a time where basketball is pure and beautiful to watch. He’s the most gifted and perfect basketball creation. I am amazed that this team has been able to do so much when it trots out a starting five with a center who is not a post presence, a power forward who is absolutely no threat offensively (to the point where, if left completely alone at 15 feet will frantically look around for someone to pass to), LeBron, an undersized, streaky, and sort of diseased-looking guy with a neck-tat, and Mo Williams. That’s not an imposing team. Not even close and they won 67 games. In order for us, the basketball watching world, to fully experience the Holy LeBron Experience, he needs to have more awesome guys around him. I don’t know if he’ll leave Cleveland (I hope he doesn’t, because I’m sentimental and I know a guy from Cleveland), but I do hope that they continue to bring in guys that can play.

I didn’t catch much, if any, of this series, but Detroit simply had no chance. It will be interesting to see what they do next year now that they have money to spend after shedding ‘Sheed and Iverson. By the way, what the hell is going to happen to Iverson next year? Obviously someone will sign him, but who? No team with a young nucleus is going to sign him because he won’t be worth it and will stifle the growth of any young player. Look, I love A.I. and it’s fun watching him play, but he’s not and never has been the best example. He could probably work in a place like Houston because sometimes that squad gets bogged down and has trouble scoring, something A.I. has never had a problem with. I can’t see him co-existing with McGrady, but isn’t McGrady all but finished?

Anyway, as much as I’d like to see the NBA playoffs changed, I’ll still watch what’s on and the games will get a lot more interesting once the pretenders get weeded out.

Failing Franchise [Tag]

2009-04-27T13:18:00.000-07:00

Why is Tim Ruskell so scared of the franchise tag? This Leroy Hill thing has me flustered. I love the guy. He’s as sure a tackler as there is in the game and he drops bombs on ballcarriers. He’s instinctive and makes plays. It defies reason to let this guy, at 27 years old at the beginning of the season, potentially walk away for nothing (or what would amount to a compensatory pick in next year’s draft).

Because they were unable to get a long-term deal done, they did the reasonable and responsible thing; they franchised him. Now Ruskell says that they removed the tag because things weren’t progressing. He cited that Hill didn’t show up for voluntary workouts as one of the reasons for removing the tag. That doesn’t even begin to make sense. Since when do franchise players ever take part in voluntary workouts or even mini-camp and most (if not all of) training camp? However, like all GMs in the league, Ruskell is not being 100% truthful with his statements. It’s impossible that he believes that because Hill did not report to volunteer camp that they need to go in another direction. It’s clear that he’d like Hill here, but ONLY at the right price. I get the sense that if Hill asks for a dollar over, then they won’t pay it and be fine with him leaving. I don’t agree with that philosophy and they are misreading Hill’s talent and what he means to this team.

It’s pretty clear that there are other things at work here. The two sides must be so far apart in negotiations rendering it nearly impossible that a deal will get done. As we all know, it’s all about guaranteed money in NFL contracts so that must be the sticking point. The reported contact that he turned down was six years at $36M. I haven’t seen the signing bonus or any other guaranteed amount assigned to that contract, but it must not be that high. I’m guessing that the guaranteed amount was somewhere in the neighborhood of $10M and Hill told them to put that figure in a diaper, where it belongs. He’s probably thinking that he’s worth at least $25M that amount, maybe more, and he’ll definitely get it elsewhere, if given the chance. Well, removing the franchise tag gives him that chance, and it’s a dumbass move.

We’ve seen this movie before with Steve Hutchinson and I didn’t like it then. I don’t like this now. Hill may not be as important to the defense as Hutchinson was to the offense, but it’s pretty close. It wouldn’t make sense to break the bank for Hill, but that’s not what the issue is here. I didn’t want them to overspend, but I did want them to keep Hill, and the franchise tag accomplishes that.

It’s hard to understand Ruskell’s willingness to give away every bit of leverage that he had. If the franchise tag causes ill will, who cares? At least Hill would still be guaranteed to be on the roster. He’s not going to sit out a season if he stands to lose $8.3M. He was on his first contract as a third-round pick; he hadn’t had his big (relatively) payday yet. He’s not going to turn that down, we’re not talking about a first round pick who made tons of money before earning it. We’re talking about a guy who is hungry to play well because of his pride (I guess) and because he wants to get paid. He’d be playing for next year’s deal with another team or the long-term deal he was seeking with the Seahawks. At the very least, he’d be franchised again and make close to $9M the next year.

If he walks, I will be furious and so will anyone else who follows this team. Yes, I want Ken Lucas back here, but not at the price of losing Hill.

I like some of the things Ruskell has done since he’s been here. He’s drafted some good players in Tatupu, Hill, Mebane, Carlson… but there have been some huge misses and I’m concerned that he’s blowing it a little. I still have faith, but it will be rocked if Hill bolts.

The optimist in me says that Hill wants to stay in Seattle because he sees that he’ll have a good opportunity to blow up in a new defensive scheme. From all accounts he likes being here and has reiterated that several times. Optimism says that he’ll stay. The pessimist (or more accurately, the realist) in me says that he’s gone and that he’ll sign elsewhere for the money that he’s seeking. I can’t blame the guy for doing so. He is now an unrestricted free agent and he wants to get paid. He’s earned that payday and if a team doesn’t swoop in and offer him a decent offer, I’d be shocked. Of course, Seattle screwed him a little by waiting until after the draft to remove the tag, but still. He’s a prized commodity and a team like Kansas City should sprint to get to him.

Another bizarre thing that Ruskell said was that they wouldn’t have done this if they hadn’t drafted Aaron Curry. Essentially he’s saying that they are comfortable if Hill leaves. If that was the case, then why didn’t they go after another LB in the draft? I’m very confused that they picked up Nick Reed. What good is a 6’1 245 lb DE in the NFL unless his name is Dwight Freeney? He’s a 4.71 40 guy (not a 4.38 40 guy, like Freeney) I could see if the Hawks ran a 3-4 defense and wanted to line the guy up as an outside LB in that scheme, but won’t he just get his ass kicked against NFL tackles since he’s undersized and not overly fast? Plus, I don’t know if I can get behind a guy who wore a longish t-shirt under his jersey.

I suppose they didn’t see any other player of value at that level, but I don’t see how this guy gets on the field. I’d love to be wrong about this.

Aaron Curry

2009-04-25T20:38:00.000-07:00

That's what I'm talking about.

The Other 103

2009-04-25T08:39:00.000-07:00

Something I thought about the other day which no doubt many others are thinking about. Are we going to learn the names of the other players 103 who tested positive for ‘roids along with Alex Rodriguez?

Isn’t it a guarantee that there are going to be names on that list that we really, really, really wish weren’t on there? No one is going to be surprised if (come on, who am I kidding) when Bret Boone’s name appears on that list given season out of nowhere followed by his toss-a-boulder-out-of-an-airplane-at-30,000-feet free fall. But what about other names? What if Edgar Martinez shows up on that list? Would you be surprised? I wouldn’t be, but that’s because while I am overly sentimental at times, I’m definitely far more cynical than I’d like to be. I’m hoping, and pretty much everyone I know who roots for the M’s is hoping, that he’s clean and he’s always been clean. But the fear I have about his name showing up lingers.

It would be such a devastating revelation that I don’t want to think about it, but it’s there. We all know it’s possible. If ‘roids use was so widespread, why would he be immune? Why would he be shielded?

I’m preemptively asking why when there is no proof linking him with any usage, but that doesn’t mean I’m not worried about it.

Coming Around on Junior

2009-04-25T08:24:00.000-07:00

I neglected to write about what I saw from Griffey the other day. I must admit, the guy is reeling me back in. Not because I necessarily like him, but it seems like he, and Mike Sweeney, have had what can only be considered a positive impact on the team. Attitude means a lot in sports and evidently those two guys have ensured that the any negative attitude that this Mariners team shows is stomped out completely and immediately.

If the attitude is the only thing that changed about the team and they were still losing, I wouldn’t care at all. But they are winning, so I do care. And it’s cool.

While I like what I see in Griffey, the weirdest thing for me is to see him at the bat about 1.5 times the size as he used to be. His swing is still beautiful and he’s always had an ass on him, but he’s just so unbelievably thick. I only saw snippets of him when he played for Cincy so I never really noticed just how large he got. It’s pretty remarkable. He’s got like a full inch layer of extra thickness all over his body.

Another striking thing about him is the way that he runs. On Jackie Robinson day when he scored from first, he rounded the bases in a very un 1995-like way (of course, that was 14 years ago). Simply put, the guy is 39-years old and runs accordingly. He’s slow. But I will say this, he looks like he’s running smartly so as not to burst his hamstrings or rupture his Achilles. He’s been through enough injuries to know just how far he can push himself before catastrophe ensues. The way that he’s running, it seems abundantly clear that he should spend next to zero amount of time in the outfield. His speed has run away from him and he can no longer catch up to it. That’s fine. Keep being a good guy in the clubhouse and making this team of former losers into winners. If that’s the reason they brought him here (and not for pure sentiment) then I applaud it.

Apologizing for the Good Dude

2009-04-25T08:05:00.000-07:00

Another reason I’m concerned about drafting a QB is due to my affection for Matt Hasselbeck. I love nearly everything about his game, with the huge exception that he tends to lose the strike zone on deep balls and also tends to throw what look to be horrible interceptions. However, I’m almost certain that at least half of his INTs are due to WRs doing the wrong thing or a miscommunication between QB and WR. I say this because some of those INTs are so egregious and there is no way he simply throws that bad of a pass. We, at home, don’t have the benefit of seeing what happens downfield and we don’t know the playbook so it’s hard to determine what went wrong on INTs. Anyway, I maintain that it’s likely not all Hasselbeck’s fault. You can call me an apologist for him and you’d probably be right.

In addition to Hasselbeck being a good QB, he’s shown himself to be a good dude off of the field. As I’ve said before he could be a great color guy at some point for several reasons, but even when the camera isn’t on he holds up. A friend of mine relayed this story to me. A father of a senior in high school ran into Hasselbeck in the grocery store and chatted him up a little bit and told Hasselbeck that his son and a few of his son’s friends were considering going to Boston College in the fall and if he (Hasselbeck) didn’t mind, could he stop by his house and talk to them about going to school there. Hasselbeck said sure, got the address, and time to be there and moved on. The dad didn’t think that he’s show up because he certainly didn’t have to. So the kids are all over at his house and the doorbell rings and it’s Hasselbeck, his wife, and his kids. He’d come to talk to them about going to B.C. and all sorts of other stuff. I guess he just hung out with the kids and answered any questions that they had and was super cool.

Tell me, how do you not root for a dude like that?

Pre-Draft Wavering...

2009-04-24T18:39:00.000-07:00

I’ve changed my mind. I no longer am pining for the Hawks to take Sanchez. I think that he has a very good chance to be good in the league, but I’ve been enamored with him simply because he’s possibly the best QB this year. That’s not the reason to take him, especially if there are players available who are very likely better prospects at their positions, like Curry, Smith, Monroe, Crabtree, or even Maclin.

It used to be that the draft was the only way teams could get quality play out of the QB position. If they missed out on a surefire prospect like Peyton Manning, Ben Roethlisberger, or Eli Manning, they were somewhat doomed and had to keep using either their own subpar QBs or sign a veteran QB through free agency. There were exceptions, like Brad Johnson or Trent Dilfer, but by and large, successful teams draft their own QBs, who they believed were great, if not once-in-a-franchise players.

Now, with the resurgence of guys like Kerry Collins, Kurt Warner, and Drew Brees, coaches and GMs are probably more apt to only go after the QB early in the draft if they fully believe in his abilities, otherwise, they’ll go after good vets who can be trusted to not wilt under pressure and execute gameplans.

This is my roundabout way of saying while I really like Sanchez and Stafford, they don’t look like surefire guys to me and therefore aren’t worth it.

If Sanchez is the pick at four tomorrow, I’ll probably be excited, but I’ll be extremely worried that they’ve just dumped a ton of cash on a guy that they don’t need right now, and who cannot help them win next year or even the year after, instead of a linebacker like Curry who will come in and play great from day one (e.g. Patrick Willis, DeMeco Ryans, Lofa Tatupu, LeRoy Hill, Odell Thurman—w/o the rap sheet). I’m leaning toward him and will be overjoyed if they nab him.

They can always take Curtis Painter (QB, Purdue) or Willie Tuitama (QB, Arizona) in rounds 5-7 and that would be just fine.

Silky J

2009-04-20T20:46:00.001-07:00

Just a quick snippet here, but I said a few weeks ago that I wanted to date Wayne Ellington and Danny Green’s jumpers. Well, that’s still the case, but they are just flings. I would like to marry Ray Allen’s jumper. Consider this a proposal. I’ve known this for awhile, but I can't fight it anymore and his jumper was sublime down the stretch tonight.

Pulling for the [Blue] Devil

2009-04-20T20:08:00.000-07:00

I love that Greg Paulus is going back to football simply because football is my favorite sport and if anyone can play it, then I believe that they should. I always get disappointed when a player decides to forego an uncertain football career, rife with injury dangers and a short professional shelf life, and decide to focus on a safer career with a much longer lifespan, such as baseball; to deny me the joy of watching them on the gridiron is just plain selfish.

Matt Tuiasosopo did it by spurning the chance to be a QB Messiah for the UW Football program in ’04 and entering the MLB draft. Before him, Grady Sizemore shunned UW and got drafted by the Cleveland Indians and is enjoying a really nice career in the majors replete with panty-tossing female fans. I guess he made the right choice… for him. But not for me. I would have preferred seeing him Lawyer-Milloying people up at safety.

So anyway, good for Greg. He tried his hand at playing PG for Duke, which I can’t blame him for doing, although he must have known that the chances for playing success beyond Duke as a PG is infinitesimal, maybe he just wanted a free Duke education? Or he thought he could buck the trend, but being smart, I’m sure he knew that was folly. Duke PGs do not go on to bigger and better things on the court. Whether it’s talent, or lack thereof, that holds them back (Steve Wojciechowski, Will Avery) or karmic vehicle interference (Bobby Hurley, Jay Williams), Duke PGs flame out on the court after they leave campus. Paulus, bucked that trend, he actually flamed out while at Durham, as a senior. As such, having his basketball career shuttered, he now turns to football, which is where he was once breathlessly tabbed as the best QB in his class.

No one knows if he can still be a good QB in college or beyond, and it’s probably been a very long time since anyone has stuck their helmet in the middle of his back, but I’m guessing that the guy can still toss the rock around. He’s a bright guy and college football, especially Rich Rodriguez’s offense, is not the least bit complex.

Amazingly, I find myself pulling for the guy, hoping that he makes it at Michigan (or wherever he ends up), and getting a crack at the NFL. Good talent is hard to find and if the guy had “it” once, it’s possible that he finds it again.

710 ESPN Seattle

2009-04-17T19:10:00.000-07:00

I like the idea that there is another sports radio station in Seattle. Really, what’s not to like? It’s nice to have an alternative when I’m not interested in whatever is going on at 950 or if that station is running a huge block of ads. I still am partial to Mitch Levy’s stuff in the morning because he’s clearly the most talented and polished guy out there, if not immature at times, but I’m fine with that. We get Calabro, whom I’ve expressed my sports love for frequently. We also get Brock Huard and that other guy who I’m sure I won’t like. Seems strange that they’d go with an out-of-towner, but whatever.

Huard has been good on TV for awhile now and he’s always had really good things to say when given a venue on the radio. I’d be very surprised if this thing didn’t work out for him long term. He’s a local guy who is bright and played in the NFL, if only briefly, but who cares? He’s always been studious and has an easy manner and comes across as a more likeable Hugh Millen, whom I like as well, but he gets bogged down sometimes.

Perhaps the greatest thing, for me at least, about this new station is that I was able to conjure up an image that was in my mind back in college. Huard, for all of the good things that he brings and will bring to the air, is a strange-looking guy. When I saw him during a game I mentioned to a friend of mine that he looked like a bird, but not just any bird. He looks exactly like Evil Tweety Bird. I grew up on Looney Toons and I remember an episode where Tweety Bird gets mutated (or something) into this evil, monster bird. That, my friends, is Brock Huard.

But don’t take my word for it…

Thanks, Ric Bucher.

2009-04-16T13:01:00.000-07:00

I’ve picked a scab and now it won’t stop bleeding. I read my first story of the year that exclusively dealt with the Sonics. ESPN’s Ric Bucher did this to me and I don’t appreciate it. I was minding my own business, reading stories about the draftability of some college players when I saw the headline, “The Rise of the…Thunder?” and I couldn’t help myself. I clicked on the story, read it, and held my own private pity party, which featured me jumping headfirst out of a two-story building with my hands tied behind my back.

It’s abundantly clear to even the most non-observant NBA fan that Presti has assembled a great nucleus and he’s got a real plan and vision for the team’s immediate and long term future. It couldn’t be more different than the Wally Walker regime. I never thought that Wally had a plan, and if he did, it was never a good one. We saw the team make pick after idiotic pick and it felt like the team was either treading water (a death sentence for mediocre NBA teams) or sinking, slowly (because of aging veterans with no young guys to take their places). It’s infuriating that this isn’t happening here.

I haven’t seen one game since they left town, but I’ve read reports on Russell Westbrook and people seem to love him. I already know that Durant is fantastic and will only continue to get exponentially better since he’s so young, so gifted, and so driven. They’re headed in the right direction and I suppose this realization is finally hitting me square in the face: They’ve moved and they’re not coming back.

Also, it seems highly unlikely that Olympia’s legislators are going to pass any bill to renovate Key Arena by the end of the legislative session (Sine Die is April 26). The bill is dead in the Senate, but could be revived because it’s a budget issue, but I’m not hopeful. If they don’t get it approved, then Clay Bennett is off of the hook and owes Seattle nothing (he’d owe $30M if Seattle didn’t get another NBA team in 5 years… but you know that already). Here’s the thing, I don’t care about the $30M. If Seattle got that money, that means that THERE WOULDN’T BE ANOTHER NBA TEAM HERE. And I want a team to relocate here, certainly before five years goes by. I’m worried that the people who matter will forget about the NBA and will no longer attempt to bring a team back. The longer the NBA stays away, the further it gets pushed out of our minds and the less it will matter. That’s a bad thing. Also, unlike some comments that I’ve heard, I do not care where the team comes from, just as long as we get one. If it’s Memphis, fine. I’ll take OJ Mayo and Rudy Gay. If it’s Sacramento, fine. I’ll take Spencer Hawes and Kevin Martin. If it’s New Orleans (please let it be New Orleans), then fine. I’ll (gladly) take Chris Paul and David West. I’m concerned about Kansas City and their already built arena though, I’ve got to think that the NBA would rather go there since an “NBA-ready Arena” (i.e. high ticket prices and luxury boxes and adequate parking) is already in place. The NBA is not going to expand, that’s for damn sure, so the only way to get a team is going to be through relocation and while that sucks, I don’t really care. The people in Memphis would not even shift in their seats if that team left. Sacramento is less likely because I’d be surprised if the Maloofs actually sold the team, don’t they like being NBA owners? As for New Orleans, part of me would feel bad, but like an addict, I’d take that hit. I’ve got to, especially for that real good package.

All that said, I readily admit that the NBA’s regular season is exceedingly boring. The season is way too long and the ticket prices are way too high. But since I go (or went) to the games so sporadically, the ticket prices don’t affect me. I just watch on TV because all of the games are televised. Regardless, while the regular season is dull, the playoffs are quite the opposite. The drama that builds during each of these series is great. This year presents several compelling matchups in both the Western and Eastern Conferences. Even if the Sonics were here, they wouldn’t be in the playoffs, I get that, but I’d have hope that they were on their way so it wouldn’t bother me too much that they’re left out.

I’m curious to see how many games Utah takes from L.A. Denver has its hands full with New Orleans, despite Chandler’s issues. San Antonio is highly vulnerable without Manu against a Dallas squad that is playing well. Portland and Houston is great for so many reasons, not the least of which is how Brandon Roy will respond to being guarded by two of the best defenders in the NBA (Artest and Battier) in a series. Sentimentally I’m pulling for Portland simply because of Roy (although I’ll be rooting for Aaron Brooks as well), but my head tells me that Houston is going to pull out this series, mostly because they won’t have to worry about McGrady’s extraordinarily fragile psyche. I’m also curious to see how Oden handles Yao. My guess? Not well.

I care less about the Eastern Conference with the exception of LeBron. I would very much enjoy watching him trounce all comers and average something like 37 points 10 boards 11 assists 3 steals and 2 blocks throughout the playoffs. No one in the East can stop him and I’d like to see him try to snap at least one defender’s forearm at the rim with one of his “I’m a He-Man Action Figure While You’re a G.I. Joe Action Figure, Thus I’m Out of Scale and Will Hurt You” dunks. He’s amazing and I want to watch him do amazing things.

I know that we’ll see the same sort of maniacal effort out Kobe, so they are set for a collision course in the finals and the basketball world should not be cheated here; we need to see Medusa v. The Kracken we deserve a Cleveland v. LA finals.

So, I’ll be watching the playoffs, while cursing my Durantlessness, but I’ll still be entertained, and I’ll remain hopeful that someone will right this wrong.

The Master

2009-04-13T17:01:00.000-07:00

I crept downstairs at my in-laws’ house during Easter family activities yesterday to sneak a peak at the Masters. More accurately, I wanted to see how Tiger was doing at the Masters. If he wasn’t involved, there is no chance that I would have bothered at all. Such is the allure of Tiger. It’s strange because I usually dislike the favorite. I hate the Yankees, Red Sox, Lakers, Spurs, Patriots, Steelers (boy do I hate the Steelers), Cowboys etc. But as my wife told me yesterday as I was discussing this with her, “Those are all franchises, not individuals.” Well, that’s a good point. But is that really it? I’d still love basketball if LeBron wasn’t playing. I’d still love football if Tom Brady wasn’t playing (as evidenced by last year). I’d still love (ok, like) baseball if Ichiro wasn’t playing. But I would not watch a single hole of golf coverage if Tiger wasn’t playing. In fact, when he was injured, I didn’t watch a thing. I only care about golf if he’s involved and I don’t get it.

I suppose I’ve got a few reasons. He’s a minority guy, in a sport rife with white guys, historically and presently. He’s about my age (I’m about a year and a half older). He’s revolutionized the sport and made everyone around him (competitors included) wildly rich. He’s amazingly good at what he does and may go down as the best player the game has ever seen. I suppose those are all good-enough reasons, but they all seem awfully shallow.

He’s not especially engaging and has such a measured, nerdy kind of voice. He rarely says anything interesting and the only things I know about him are that he lives in Orlando (or thereabouts), he has an exceedingly gorgeous wife, he has two kids, he’s filthy rich, Nike loves him (and he loves Nike), and he has a boat named Privacy. Those are boring things to know.

But he’s not boring on the course, which is the important part. He gets pissed out there and doesn’t hide his frustration. He expects every shot to be incredible, and when it’s not, he gets angry and pushes to make the next shot the incredible one. He’s relentless and it’s cool to see because with all of that drive, talent, and mental toughness he’s bound to put together something that we’ve never seen before.

For lack of something better, I guess that's what I love about the guy. He knows that he is physically the most talented guy in the game, but he also practices harder than anyone else (or, to be fair, it's probably more accurate to say that he practices at least as hard as anyone else). He's the best in the game and doesn't waste his talents by coasting. Going further, he never, ever cheats the game, he always comes ready to dominate. By extension, he never, ever cheats us as fans because we want to see him at his best.

I appreciate that.

Bigger Dance

2009-04-10T12:45:00.001-07:00

I’m a regular participant in Sports Radio 950 KJRAM’s Bigger Dance. Yes, it’s slightly misogynistic and definitely juvenile, but hey, they have great prizes! Sadly, I’ve never finished any higher than 1,500 or thereabouts. I used to be terrible at this contest because I’d try to guess the ladies that the callers would have picked and I always guess wrong. I’d overestimate how much people liked Angelina Jolie and pick her to go too far even if I don’t like her myself. Last year, and certainly this year, I can’t even do that because I have no idea who most of these ladies are. Actually, that’s a blanket statement. I just did a cursory look through the names and decided that I don’t know “most” of them. Is that really true? Let’s put it to the test. Below, I’m going to go through each entrant, 1-64, by name only, to see who I really know and don’t know:

Hayden Panettiere – I might be able to pick her out of a lineup, but probably not. I know she’s the girl from that NBC show “Heroes,” but I’ve never seen it. She was also the coach’s annoying little daughter on that terrible “Remember the Titans” movie. Incidentally, it’s really weird that Avon Barksdale was the star linebacker on that team and those “football” scenes that they shot were simply embarrassing.
Keeley Hazell – I’ve heard this name before, but there is no chance I could tell you who she is.
Isla Fisher – drawing a blank here.
Megan Fox – I know that she’s molten-lava hot because I’ve seen photos of her, but I don’t know why she’s famous. Is she an actress? Is she a model? I have no idea.
Elin Nordegren – Tiger’s wife and like a three-time runner up in this event.
Alessandra Ambrosio – no clue, sounds like a model though.
Jennifer Love Hewitt – what’s she doing here? Is she still relevant? I’ve always liked her, but isn’t she passé by now?
Jessica Simpson – she is too, and has added some lbs according to Eminem’s new video. Speaking of which, nice to have the guy back. I read some stories about him being riddled with acne and gaining 80lbs by eating Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse takeout every day. Does it seem weird to have takeout at a “fancy” steakhouse?
Beyonce Knowles – Yes, I do know who she is and that video with JT and Samberg for “Single Ladies” is fantastic.
Freida Pinto – She’s got to be a foreign model. Is she dating a soccer player or something?
Natalie Gulbis – the golfer lady who is good looking… for an athlete, but nothing special.
Emmanuelle Chriqui – I don’t know her.
Eva La Rue – or her
Mila Kunis – She’s an actress, but with an axe over my head I couldn’t tell you what she’s been in
Shakira – the singer from Brazil who moves this way and that.
Kate Walsh – Is she the woman from that terrible “Gray’s Anatomy” show?
Nicole Scherzinger – this isn’t very fun anymore.
Gisele Bundchen – Tom Brady won’t be the same
Reese Witherspoon – I don’t understand her appeal at all.
Brooke Burke – but I do understand hers.
Adriana Lima – Explain Marko Jaric again to me, please.
Sarah Palin – sigh. Tina Fey would be a better entrant.
Brooklyn Decker – I don’t get her. I guess she’s good looking, but she’s got a real alien-like quality to her.
Jessica Biel – she does too, if aliens were drop-dead gorgeous.
Danica Patrick – please, she’s weak.
Salma Hayek – But she’s not. She’s still bangin’ out 45 HRs and 140 RBI.
Eva Mendes – I’ve always been a fan.
Marisa Tomei – She was part of one of the best scenes from “Seinfeld” when George was “making out” with her on the couch.
Kate Beckinsale – I know who she is, but not really. She’s been in some horrid movies, like “Pearl Harbor” but I’m not that confident that I could pick her out of a crowd.
Halle Berry – I’ve been a fan since “Boomerang.”
Melissa (The Bachelor) – this doesn’t help me, no clue.
Vanessa Hudgens – nope.
Ana Ivanovic – she’s a very fetching tennis player.
Jennifer Aniston – like Salma, she’s still killing it. She’s better looking now than she was 15 years ago.
Julianne Hough – no idea.
Bar Refaeli – she’s on the cover of SI’s swimsuit edition.
Penelope Cruz – still hanging on, but she’s fading sort of fast. I saw “Vicki Cristina Barcelona” recently and she annoyed me in it.
SaraJean Underwood – what?
Jessica Alba – she’s great.
Scarlett Johansson – I saw her in 2001 or so in that horrible movie “Ghost World” and I can’t believe that she’s so popular now. She came on strong a little bit ago and I appreciated that she looks like a normal woman, but she’s fallen out of favor with me recently, I’m sure she’s devastated. Oh, she was also annoying in “Vicki Cristiana Barcelona,” I just didn’t like that movie.
Rosario Dawson – I do like her though…
Eliza Dushku – I’m not sure why she’s on this list.
Angelina Jolie – I understand that a lot of people find her attractive. I’m not one of them.
Anne Hathaway – she seems cool. I like her range as an actress, but she seems like a one-and-done type to me.
Erin Andrews – in danger of overexposure, but that’s fine by me.
Yvonne Strahovski – does she play the piano? Who is she?
Britney Spears – get real.
Katy Perry – I just read something about her lately, but I can’t remember who she is.
Lisa Gangel – local news person. Whatever.
Blake Lively – no idea.
Kristen Bell – no idea.
Kim Kardashian – she sits on pillows.
Rihanna – she got abused lately by her boyfriend or something, but I don’t know what she looks like and there is no chance that I’d be able to name or recognize one of her songs.
Taylor Swift - ?
Leryn Franco – She’s a javelin thrower from… Peru? Something like that.
Miranda Kerr – clueless.
Marisa Miller – she’s probably the best looking person on this list.
Eva Longoria – her run is over.
January Jones – I love “Mad Men” and her character has gone off of the deep end. I’m dying for that show to get going again in the summer.
Maria Sharapova – like Natalie Gublis, she’s pretty … for an athlete. Otherwise run-of-the-mill.
Kate Hudson – I don’t get her.
Carrie Underwood – or her.
Keira Knightley – I detest this 50 lb waif. Aside from being a less-attractive Natalie Portman, what exactly makes her special? I find that that she would be able to play an 11-year old girl, convincingly, a bit troubling.
Rebecca Stevenson – I think she’s a local news person, but I’m not sure.

I did better than I thought. I know roughly 68 percent of the names, and I figured I’d come in around 50 percent. My ignorance may help me this time around though, because knowing too much about someone may cloud my judgment. Speaking of clouding judgment, I forgot to mention one woman who I always picked to go too far—the mighty one herself, Heidi Klum. By any objective standard that woman is the most gorgeous person alive, maybe ever, yet she never advanced very far and now she’s not even in the field, which is probably for the best, at least for me.

Anyway, I look forward to finishing well out of the money again this year.

If you’d like to join my “office pool” here is the info for the one I set up:

Pool Name: Who Are They?

Password: dunno

Why, VY?

2009-04-10T12:32:00.000-07:00

I was wrong about Vince Young. I remember thinking when he was at Texas that he had a nasty-looking throwing motion, that he played in that gimmicky spread offense enabling him to see the field easily and complete a high percentage of his passes, and that nearly all of his big plays came from what he did with his feet, rather than his arm. Those were the negatives, and I discounted all of them because it seemed like he had a good enough arm, enough accuracy, and most importantly those intangibles that sports people like to talk about: heart, desire, and the ever nebulous “leadership qualities.” We heard stories about how he saw his teammates slacking off during an early season practice after their win over Michigan in the Rose Bowl the previous year and said something like, “The Rose Bowl is over, y’all!” and made everyone spring into action. I heard that and was impressed. It seemed like his teammates loved him and that he could be a rah-rah kind of guy because he backed it up with his play on the field. This was a guy to follow and get behind because he’s going to be special.

Conversely, a guy like Ryan Leaf had the physical makeup to be a prototypical NFL QB because of his size and cannon arm, but he lacked these intangibles. He was hated by his teammates because he was a crybaby with a terrible attitude and lacked real confidence. VY was the complete opposite, except for the size, of course, since he and Leaf are both 6’5 and over 230. Where Leaf got by on his arm, VY got by on his legs, but had great team success because he was able to will his team to wins. Look no further than those two Rose Bowl games against Michigan and USC. He was unstoppable.

It just seemed that VY would be able to overcome his unorthodox throwing motion, learn an NFL offense, and become a star because those intangibles that he possessed are much harder, if not impossible, to develop, than a nice throwing motion. Leaf never came close to being a leader in the NFL, because he never was one at Washington State. Meanwhile, VY hasn’t developed any sort NFL-caliber arm, and hasn’t mastered an NFL offense to the degree that he can be counted on to win games—far from it. He’s been relegated to the bench and all logical signs point to him getting kicked out of Tennessee. He would be jettisoned without question if he wasn’t such a high draft pick and owed so much money, but he will be gone soon. But it’s not because he can’t throw pretty passes and it’s not because he hasn’t mastered Tennessee’s offense, which, let’s be honest, is not known as one of the most complex in the league given the amount that the team runs the ball. He’s going to be kicked to the curb because of his attitude. He’s going to be kicked to the curb because he lacks those very intangibles that I thought he had. He seems to be a crappy teammate. He seems to lack heart. He seems to lack desire. He has shown no semblance that he can be any kind of leader. Quite the opposite, he’s shown himself to be a moody, brooding, baby. Not all that different from Ryan Leaf.

So, is there something to downfalls of these two guys? Are they more similar than they appear to be? Are there any other similar causative indicators? Both were picked high in the draft (Leaf No. 2, VY No. 3), but Leaf was thrust into the starting position early, while VY took a backseat. They both played in the Rose Bowl? Yeah, but Leaf lost and VY won, in dramatic fashion. If I had to guess, and that’s exactly what I’m doing, then I’d say it comes down to the relationships that both players had with their head coaches in college.

Mack Brown at Texas is known to overly coddle his players. For whatever reason, Brown thinks that it’s best to be loved by his players rather than feared (or respected, even). He did the same thing with Chris Simms (who hasn’t turned out to be worth a damn in the NFL, spleen or no spleen), going so far as to answer difficult questions posed to Simms during post-game press conferences. Dude, you can’t protect these kids forever and they will NOT be ready to succeed once they are out on their own. They won’t know how to handle any sort of adversity if they are not faced with any early on in their careers. You can’t change their pissy bed sheets forever. Mike Price, Leaf’s coach at Washington State at the time, treated Leaf in much the same way. Because Leaf was so immensely talented, Price enabled Leaf to be the jackass that he was. He stuck up for him no matter what, and while it served both of them well while Leaf was gunslinging in Pullman, Leaf fell flat on his face when he left the nest. The same thing is happening with VY. He has no idea how to handle himself when things go wrong. It’s as if the world doesn’t understand that he’s the man and needs to be treated as such. Why should he change his ways if he’s always been the messiah?

It sucks because as much as I detested Ryan Leaf, anyone could see that he was talented, and it’s cool to see talented guys perform. True fans of sports and competition, allegiances and biases aside, want to see the best at their best. Leaf was great, and now he’s adrift. It’s a shame. VY is abundantly talented and can definitely turn it around because his career is in its pupa stages, but he’s definitely headed in Leaf’s direction if he doesn’t figure it out soon. I hope that he does because he’s fun to watch, but I’m dubious.

NBA Draft, MBA, HORSE, Crabtree

2009-04-08T19:07:00.000-07:00

NBA Draft
I love the “this guy looks like that guy” game and the “this player is most like this player” game. I do it constantly. And while I do it for fun, I’m told that scouts do it because it’s a good way to completely evaluate a player because it sort of puts a fake ceiling on the guy’s potential. With Blake Griffin telling the sports world what it already knew by declaring for the draft yesterday, it seems like a good idea to share who I think Blake Griffin is after watching him play in the tournament. He looks and plays exactly like Kenyon Martin, except that Martin was a far better defender, especially shot blocking (3.5 blocks per game). At 6’9 230, Martin is lighter than Griffin who is 6’10 250, but for all practical purposes they have the same offensive game because they both have (or had in Martin’s case) great aggression, explosion, and suddenness around the rim. Both are very solidly built, athletic guys, and both are bad-to-terrible from the free-throw line.

Griffin is lagging way, way, way behind in the ink and jackass category, but with time, he can make up some ground. Even with the injuries that Martin suffered in his NBA career (not to mention breaking his damn leg in the Conference USA tournament), Griffin would have to be pleased with this comparison. Martin went No. 1 overall and has made well north of $100M in his career. I’m guessing that Griffin would take that.

DeJuan Blair is another guy ripe for an NBA comparison. When watching games and reading through various profiles, I’ve heard him being compared to Robert “Tractor” Traylor, which is completely unfair and actually off base. Blair is 6’7 265. Traylor was 6’8 and 300+. Traylor was, and probably still is, fat. He also didn’t hustle at all possessing an extremely lazy all-around game. It’s a mystery why he was drafted so high, going to Dallas at No. 6(!) overall in ’98 at then immediately traded to Milwaukee for Pat Garrity and the Diggler. Blair is not fat he’s just huge. He also plays tough and his teammates seem to love him.

The guy whose game Blair’s most closely resembles, from a widebody and below-the-rim perspective is Corliss Williamson. They both are big 6’7 power forwards. Williamson weighed anywhere from 245-260, putting him in the same girthy category as Blair. They both were and are tough guys who don’t seem to take any mess. Now, Williamson was drafted higher (13th in ’95) than Blair will be, but Blair’s game is so similar to Williamson’s and he may even be a better player defensively because of his long wingspan. While Elton Brand is the absolute ceiling for Blair, but a more realistic career is Williamson’s, which ain’t bad.

A very random guy that we saw too little of this tournament is Florida State’s Toney Douglas. We only saw him play against that team with no regard for decency in basketball (Wisconsin) but in that brief period, he looked great. At 6’1 195, he reminds me of a better, stronger, more explosive Mike Conley Jr. (6’1 185). Douglas is actually older than Conley because Conley left after his freshman season while Conley is a senior, but that shouldn’t lessen his NBA prospects. The biggest issue with Douglas, now that I’ve actually looked at his stats is that he didn’t create many buckets for others (only 2.9 assists/game) and turned the ball over at nearly the same rate (2.5 turnovers/game). I have no idea if that’s because of his team’s inability to score of if he hogs the ball. He scored 21.5 and shot 38% from three and 81% from the line so he’s clearly able to get his own points, but if the Wisconsin game is any indication, he’s got a pretty decent-looking game and looked to be in complete control the entire time with an abundance of (well-deserved) confidence. He probably won’t be drafted in the first round, but it won’t be because he doesn’t deserve it (just as Mike Conley Jr. didn’t deserve to go No. 4 overall), but I can see him making a team and doing some good things in the NBA. Anyway, just watching him for the short period that I saw him, I’m convinced that he’s better than Luke Ridnour ever was or will ever be, not that that means much.

MBA
Here’s an extremely random and out-of-date take that I buried in my notes awhile back regarding Matthew Bryan-Amaning, who, by all indications, looks to be a guy I may castigate until he leaves UW.

I pulled this quote from Bob Condotta’s blog, the excellent beat guy for UW Football and Basketball. He spoke to Matthew Bryan-Amaning and asked him about his production during the Pac-10 schedule:

"It was just that when the Pac-10 season started, everyone started to fill in their roles, Jon and Isaiah (Thomas) and Quincy (Pondexter) were the main offensive guys on this team and I felt that maybe if one of those guys wasn't having a good scoring night I needed to step up,'' he said. "But what they needed from me and Darnell (Gant) was defense and rebounding, really.''

That’s a fair point about why he didn’t score much, he only averaged 5.4 points during the Pac-10 schedule. I get that. He wasn’t called upon to score and that’s totally cool. However, if he wasn’t asked to score and wasn’t shooting much, how does that explain shooting a ridiculously low 38.9 percent from the field as a post player? That’s atrocious. We all know that he consistently missed easy 2-footers, so I shouldn’t be surprised that he missed 61 percent of his shots, but it’s still remarkable. Does he not look when he shoots? He seems allergic to the backboard and is in love with the back of the iron. He turns what should be a high percentage shot (being 6’9 and in deep position in the low post) into a low percentage shot because it seems abundantly clear that he has no idea how to shoot a jump hook with any reliable degree of accuracy. I’m going out on a limb here by saying that someone is going to beat him out for playing time next season. A successful team cannot have its post player killing them on the offensive end. Maybe he’s left handed and hasn’t realized it. I want him to be good and UW needs him to be good, and maybe he’ll turn it around because he’ll be the unquestioned big guy for them. As we’ve seen time after time, players’ games mature as they get older. Brockman looked absolutely terrible as a freshman and while he didn’t progress all that much as an offensive player, he never had those types of physical skills. MBA has them and hopefully he’ll use them.

HORSE
I watched the HORSE (presented by GEICO) competition during NBA All-Star Weekend. I love the concept and it makes sense for the NBA to stage the event outside because most people play HORSE outside, at the playground or in the hoop at someone’s house. Sadly, the event was boring and I was disappointed. The idea is cool, but there is an unavoidable flaw to HORSE that makes it kind of a crappy spectator sport. If no one is hitting shots, it’s unbelievably boring. The players don’t think it’s boring because if they keep missing, they’re hoping the other guy is missing too so that he can get himself back in the game. To make HORSE a successful spectator sport, the players themselves absolutely must be engaged and entertaining.

No one outside of NBA scouts has seen Memphis play all year (not even the good people of Memphis), so OJ Mayo was a bit of a mystery in terms of his NBA talent. I’m not talking about his NBA game, necessarily; I mean his talent to be extraordinarily cocky and entertaining at the same time. He definitely had some flashes of smack talk, I heard him say something like “it’s an easy shot Kev… no problem…” just before Kevin Durant was going to shoot. That’s the kind of stuff everyone does playing HORSE. It’s a reverse psychology thing to make people let down their guard a bit and miss an easy shot. It’s a head game and it’s accepted and encouraged—especially by me. I didn’t see any of that out of Durant or Joe Johnson. This event was missing a cutup, a person who is a non-stop jabbermouth who could back up anything he was saying. The guy that they were missing was Gilbert Arenas. He’s a motormouth of the highest order and he’s funny. He’s also been known to annoy the hell out of his teammates. I recall a story when he was a rookie where he had to bring donuts to practice, but before anyone could take one, he licked every single one. It’s a childish and stupid thing to do, but that type of attitude (annoying, but funny) is perfect for HORSE because it would throw people off their game or at least cause them to concentrate more. It really is a shame that Agent Zero was hurt this year, he’d have been perfect. Maybe next year.

Also, Gary Payton would have been an incredible contestant for this event. He had a really gross-looking “jumper” that he’d toss up with his head slightly cocked back and would have talked the entire time. Plus, GP is great with his left hand since he writes with his left hand, but shoots with his right hand. He would have melted people down with his ability and mouth, it’s too bad this wasn’t around when he was playing. Maybe they should have an NBA legends HORSE game?

Michael Crabtree
His injury to his foot notwithstanding, it seems so weird that several news outlets and football writers are lamenting the fact that Crabtree is not 6’3, but instead 6’1+ as if that’s a huge difference. Correct me if I’m wrong, but is he not bigger than nearly every DB he’ll go against next year in the NFL? Since when is being over 6’1 a detriment to a WR? Does it hurt Anquan Boldin? Just because he’s not as big as Larry Fitzgerald, a guy people want to compare Crabtree to because our minds are so limited we can only follow what’s directly in front of us. E.g. Fitzgerald was all the rage, deservedly so, in the playoffs, doesn’t mean he won’t be amazing in the NFL. So, consequently, every receiver is compared to him and anyone not fitting his exact parameters is therefore negatively impacted. It’s ridiculous. It’s lazy. And it’s all too common.

Title Game

2009-04-06T12:31:00.000-07:00

Wayne Ellington and Danny Green are very silky three-point shooters, so much so that I’d like to take both of their jumpers on a date and just see what happens. But neither are great three-point shooters off the bounce. They are best when they spot up and knock ‘em down. They are extremely confident, and should be, but they get into trouble when their feet aren’t set and they shoot threes anyway. Against Nova, Green made a bunch in a row, but then had sort of a transition look at the basket, took a dribble and shot up a leaner from beyond the arc. Of course it didn’t drop because he was out of rhythm and shot it awkwardly, but he was so confident that it would fall (because nearly everything else was) that he pulled anyway.

If Michigan State can force him into those kinds of shots, that would be a huge positive for them. However, he is so effective off the dribble when going toward the hoop, and he neglected that part of his game entirely on Saturday. Michigan State should guard him tighter, and if they do, he can’t force shots. If he does, Carolina is going to be in trouble. One thing that Green can do and Ellington can also do, but to a lesser extent, is shoot from farther out. It’s easy to see that Green’s range extends to NBA line and beyond because he shoots so effortlessly, kind of like how Kevin Durant jacks. If Michigan State sags, he should pull. A shot from farther out is better than a contested shot for him. But he should attack the rim from the angle and utilize the glass if they body him up; he’s very good at that.

Lawson was nice again against Nova’s tough backcourt, but Izzo’s teams always play tough perimeter D. I’d be surprised if they didn’t slow him down and force the ball out of his hands. I doubt he’ll get any free looks at the hoop either from downtown. He’s been able to utilize screens, because defenders have gone under them, and hit his jumpers. I’ve got to think that Michigan State is going stay on him and go over the screens and have help in the lanes. We’ll see though.

Hansbrough showed that he gets after rebounds, but also that he has some of the most disgusting-looking post moves I’ve ever seen. That “hook” shot thing he tosses up from the middle of his torso should be sent to next Thursday by any self-respecting post defender. I can only assume that he’s able to get these off because he barrels into people and leans away, but a guy with any length at all will kill that. That said he gets to the line and makes people pay for fouling him, which is huge for a “big” man like him. As I’ve said before, he’s got a great-looking 15-18 foot jumper and that will save him a spot in the NBA, but we’re not talking about the NBA, we’re talking about tonight’s game. He’ll get his and be a factor, but he won’t be the reason that Carolina wins or loses. It’s in the hands of Ellington, Green, and Lawson. The 1, 2 and 3s make this team go.

Michigan State has been playing really well and their ferocity and determination on the boards against UConn was impressive, especially given UConn’s frontcourt. They simply got after it more and it’s very hard not to appreciate that. Their guards have been playing wonderfully and shooting really well. I would not be surprised if they took this game because they have the berries to withstand Carolina’s tidal-wave like offense. I love watching Carolina play because they are fearless and play fast, and oftentimes, smart basketball, but I’ll probably be pulling for the Spartans simply because they’re the underdog and they seem to have a little bit of magic about them. No, not the one in the stands, but he’s there too.

All that said, here’s my predicted final: Carolina 88 Michigan State 83 (Lawson MOP).

A few asides from the Saturday games:

Reggie Redding

looks like

Damon Dash

Tyler Hansbrough

looks like

J.D. McCoy from “Friday Night Lights.”

Dante Cunningham

looks like

Eddie George, right down to the swollen muscles and skeltorish face

Final Four

2009-04-03T18:41:00.001-07:00

Michigan State will play well in this game, they’ll be gutty, they’ll play great defense, Suton will hit shots, and UConn will win this game by 10 points. Michigan State was on fire against Louisville from downtown and I just don’t see that happening again in this game. They will be forced to shoot and UConn is not a stupid team, like Louisville is. They’ll be patient, they’ll be tough, and they will win. Jeff Adrien is playing horrendously on the offensive end for UConn, but he’s a tough defender and he gets garbage points. As long has he doesn’t shoot his nasty corkscrew-looking jumper, he’ll be fine. Stanely Robinson is playing really well on both ends and I see no reason why he won’t keep it up. I’m in love with Kemba Walker’s game and Michigan State will try and neutralize him, but he’s just too good, even if he is a freshman. Hasheem Thabeet will block many and alter more. I just don’t see any way how Michigan State wins.

I’m all over Villanova’s jock. If they play like they did against Pitt, they’ll have a great chance to win this game, but for some reason, I don’t see it happening. They have a tendency to shoot ill-advised shots from time to time and since they play such good defense, they can afford to do that most nights. But this UNC team has shown itself to be so wildly efficient offensively (on drives and on jumpers) and Nova isn’t going to be able to jack up shots and not pay the price. Danny Green has been killing it (his smooth jumpers off of the glass make me weep). Wayne Ellington has a sweet J and it’s been working for him. Ty Lawson is going to be MOP of the Final Four. He’s killing it and everyone like Arnold in “Running Man.” They really don’t even need Hansbrough, but there he is. I’m predicting a 17 and 8 night for him, while taking like 9 shots from the field. Not great, but very solid. Sadly, I see UNC running away with this game by 15. I want to be wrong about this, but UNC is way too strong.

Draftaffection

2009-04-03T18:36:00.000-07:00

Every year I follow the combine and pro-day workouts leading up to the NFL Draft in late April. And every year, I become enamored with certain players and hope that the Hawks draft them. Sometimes I gravitate toward a player because he fills a perceived Hawks need, sometimes I just think that the guy is really good and that the Hawks can always use good players.

In the leadup to the 2004 NFL Draft, the object of my draftaffection was Jason Peters from Arkansas. I never saw the guy play, but I saw what he did during workouts and was blown away. Yes, I know, beware of workout warriors. But hear me out. He played tight end for the Razorbacks, which isn’t remarkable. He was remarkable because of his size and the fact that he played TE in the first place. Here is a sampling of some of his workout numbers:

Height: 6’4 ½
Weight: 328 lbs
40 Time: 4.93 (at the combine); 4.85
(at Arkansas’s pro day)
Bench 225 lbs: 21 (at the combine); 25 (at Arkansas’s
pro day)
Vert: 29 (at the combine); 33 ½ (at Arkansas’s pro day)
Broad
Jump: 9’ 7”

Simply put, there is no way that a guy that size should be able to move like that. He was projected to be a tackle in the NFL simply because of his size (which makes me wonder what the hell Arkansas was doing playing him at TE). Because of the position switch, he wasn’t going to be a high draft pick, but it seemed like a team should definitely take a flyer on in the third or fourth round. I desperately wanted the Hawks to do so. Instead he wound up not getting drafted at all. Tell me, how does a guy with that much crazy, freaky ability not get picked? He turned out to be one of the best LTs in the game as evidenced by being selected to the Pro Bowl in ’07 and ’08 and was second team all pro both years. How can I, with no playing experience beyond bad high school football, be pining for this guy (and be right about him) when all 32 other teams take a complete pass on him? I don’t get it. Sure, hindsight is 20/20, but I wanted him then, as well as now.

As I dismount from my high horse, it’s only fair that I get my foot caught in the stirrups and fall flat on my face because I was over-the-moon enamored with Champ Bailey’s younger brother, Boss, who ended up getting drafted in the second round by the Detroit Lions in ’03. He has had a decent, but not fantastic career and is now in Denver with his brother earning 17.5M over 5. I couldn’t get over his size 6’3 235 and numbers, which were an astounding 4.38 40 and 48 inch vert. Cornerbacks and receivers would bury their mothers for those numbers and this was a guy who played at a high level in the SEC at Georgia finishing second in both the Butkus and Lombardi awards (linebacker and lineman/linebacker awards). His production and numbers convinced me that he’d be a fantastic linebacker in the NFL and I was wrong, he’s merely decent.

Also, in the ’05 draft I wanted the Hawks to take OLB Daryl Blackstock out of Virginia. Instead they drafted both Lofa Tatupu and Leroy Hill. I guess I’ll give them a “pass” on those two.

Most recently, I’ve focused on production in college with the caveat that if a player is surrounded by subpar talent then he’s upgraded in my mind.

There are many objects of my draftaffections this year based on what I’ve seen and they are as follows:

First-Round Guys
· Eugene Monroe, 6’5 309 LT, University of Virginia
I’m going off of the guys from National Football Post on this one. The Hawks need a good LT and they seem to agree that this is the guy. Jason Smith out of Baylor is supposed to be amazing as well, but he might end up in Detroit and if not there, then most certainly he’ll go to St. Louis since Orlando Pace wasn’t resigned (and hasn’t been the same in two years, good luck with that, Chicago.)

It’s difficult for normal fans to “scout” offensive lineman (on TV) since we really don’t know what to look for and the focus isn’t on them. We certainly can tell if they continually maul someone or if they give up sacks, or if they get blown up on running plays (like Chris Gray did two years ago and Rob Simms did last year, and the year before. Look, I love Chris Gray, the guy was very solid, but he got his ass handed to him on several occasions. I guess playing with a possible broken neck isn’t very good for you).

I’m told that Monroe is technically sound, strong, and athletic. If he falls to the Hawks, they’ve got to take him.

· Knowshon Moreno, HB, Georgia, 5’11 217
He’s an electric runner who did some pretty damn amazing things at Georgia the last few years. When I watched him play, I saw a shifty back who makes people miss and can catch the ball. He ran pretty pedestrian times at the combine and at Georgia’s pro day (4.6ish), but his initial burst is what makes him interesting. Plus, he’s bigger than I thought he was. I figured he’d be around 190, maybe 200, but he’s nearly 220. I don’t know if he gained weight after the season (which would explain the slower times) but if he’s able to run like he did in college at that size, he’s going to be really good.

He’s probably going to go in the first round anyway, and the Hawks certainly shouldn’t pick him at No. 4, but if he does fall out of the first round, I hope that they nab him.

· Matthew Stafford, QB, Georgia (6-2, 225)
· Mark Sanchez, QB, USC (6-2, 227)

I’m torn between these two guys. I liked both of them during the year. They’re nearly identical physically at 6’2 and around 225, although their weight must be distributed differently because Stafford kind of looks fattish (like Rex Grossman) and Sanchez almost looks skinny. Both of them seem to be smart and affable. Both are very similar athletically: they ran 4.8+ 40s and had nearly the same verts, 32.5 for Sanchez 30.5 and for Stafford, and broad jumps 9’8 for Sanchez and 8’11 for Stafford).

Statistically, they were eerily similar last year:

Stafford
235-383 3459 yards 61.4% 9.03 per attempt 78 long 25 TDs 10 INTs 17 sacks 153.54 rating

Sanchez
241-336 3207 yards 65.8% 8.76 per attempt 63 long 34 TDs 10 INTs 17 sacks 164.64 rating

Stafford has a ton more experience than Sanchez and has a stronger arm, but I don’t know how much that matters if the arm is good enough. The knock on Stafford is that he lacks sound decisionmaking at times and trusts his arm too much because it is so strong. Maybe that’s true, but if it is, I’m fairly certain that kind of thinking would be beaten out of him by an NFL QB coach, offensive coordinator, and head coach. Either that or the 30 interceptions he’d throw during the year would get him to change his stripes.

Sanchez does not have the same stunningly-strong arm that Stafford has, but his gun is plenty strong enough. He is also very poised in the pocket. I like his completion rate a little better than I like Stafford’s, he was simply more efficient with his throws.

I’ll put it this way, I would be happy with either one of these guys and if one or both is available at No. 4, I’m hoping that the Hawks take one of them. I’d love a lineman, but these guys are good players and I’m very concerned about Hasselbeck’s ability to stay healthy this year and next.

· Jeremy Maclin, WR, Missouri, 6-0, 198
· Percy Harvin, WR, Florida, 5-11, 192

These two guys exemplify what’s wrong with perceptions and workout numbers. Anyone watching these guys play last year and previous years can tell that they both possess explosive, gamebreaking speed and agility. But the lament from scouts is that neither one of them put up insane 40 times. The fastest time that I’ve seen for Maclin is a 4.43 and the fastest I’ve seen from Harvin is a 4.41 that he ran at the combine. Were they supposed to run 4.2s? Would 4.39 have been fast enough? These guys can catch the ball, separate, make people miss, and score. I’d love to have either one playing for the Hawks. I’d take Maclin over Harvin because it seems like he’s a better route-runner and doesn’t get hurt as much as Harvin does, but I’d take either one in a heartbeat. Of course, the Hawks will pick neither one at No. 4 and they’ll be long gone by the time they pick in the second round.

· Clay Matthews, OLB, USC, 6-3, 240
I’m hoping that Matthews falls out of the first round on draft day, although he’ll probably go in the teens. He’s got fantastic size, speed, and explosiveness. The National Football Post guys had a great article on the 10-yard dash part of the 40-yard dash and how that time is the true measure of a defensive end/linebacker. Clay Matthews turned in a time that would have been outstanding for a cornerback, which means the guy can get off of the ball and make things happen, which is exactly what he did for USC last year.

Second-Seventh-Round Guys

· Brian Robiskie, WR, Ohio State 6-3, 205
Now here’s a guy that the Hawks have a shot at in the second or third round. He has good-enough speed (ran a 4.49 at the combine), but I’m more impressed with what scouts are saying about his “polished” route-running ability and great hands. It would be ridiculous if those things weren’t the case since his dad is a damn WR coach in the NFL, but still. Also, I didn’t know he was as big as he is. I’d absolutely love it if the Hawks picked him up.

· Sean Smith, CB, Utah 6-4, 214
A big CB is just what the doctor ordered for this Hawks team. Evidently the guy ran his 40s in the high 4.4-range at Utah’s pro day, but more impressive than that was his agility and smoothness during his position drills. I read that he moved around like he was 5’10, which if he was that height, the Hawks would knock over their grandmother’s to draft because they love undersized CBs. They need a guy like this back there. Badly.

· Willie Tuitama, QB, Arizona 6-3, 234
He’s probably a 5-7th round guy and it would make a ton of sense for the Hawks to go after him that late. He’s a very accurate passer (64.9% … 23 TDs 8 INTs) who is marginally athletic, but who would be perfect to groom for a starting job down the line. I saw him light up UW like a brushfire on several occasions, but that’s not saying much.

Thoughts on Jay Cutler
I have a friend, Mike, from Chicago and I was going to tauntingly call him on Wednesday and say something stupid like “It’s too bad the Bears don’t need a QB because Cutler’s available.” Since I thought it would be dumb and mean for me to do, I didn’t make the call. They, along with Seattle, were about the last teams that I thought would actually pull the trigger on a deal to land him. He’s handled this thing like a spoiled kid with bad Donald Trump hair. I don’t care if McDaniel’s screwed this thing up, it’s never good to act like a petulant baby; it just doesn’t keep with being a leader, but maybe he doesn’t care about that.

Nevertheless, he’ll be very good for Chicago, however, they need some receivers in a bad way. He’s not throwing to Eddie Royal and Brandon Marshall anymore (although, it could be said that those guys were made better because of Cutler… I suppose we’ll see).

Denver came out of this looking OK. They’re getting a guy in Kyle Orton who is not terrible, necessarily, but certainly not in the same stratosphere as Cutler. But is he much different than Matt Cassel? If McDaniel is as good of an offensive coach as he seems to be, then Orton is going to be fine, and so is Denver’s offense; but it wasn’t the offense that screwed them last year.

Sounders FC

2009-03-31T20:43:00.000-07:00

I’m not sure if you’re heard or not, but evidently Seattle has a Major League Soccer franchise now. On Sunday, my friend, Joel, asked me what I thought about this. I told him that I had no opinion whatsoever. Yet. After thinking about it for a few minutes, I decided that the MLS will work here, but I don’t know if I’ll be interested.

Soccer is Not a Mainstream Sport
The MLS will work in the Seattle area because it’s not a mainstream sport in the national sense. The major media outlets cover the sport, but not in the comprehensive format that they cover the big three of football (NFL, NCAA Football), basketball (NBA, NCAA Basketball) or baseball (MLB). Actually, they cover the NHL more than they cover the MLS, but that may change over time. However, there is no chance that the MLS unseats any of the big three. The Seattle area has a large mix of people and a great many of them are die-hard sports fans. Some support the local teams fanatically and some support other teams because Seattle is also home to many people who come from elsewhere around the country (and the world).

Contrarians Live Here
But, there is another relatively large contingent of people who are sort of counterculture contrarians. There are intellectuals (some pseudo, some actual) who look down at sports and who prefer to watch operas, go to the symphony, or read; or smoke, drink coffee, get tattoos and piercings, play “ultimate Frisbee,” and try to out-cool people by being unconventional and ironically uncool. As if enjoying sports is mutually exclusive from engaging in any of these activities. There are outdoor enthusiasts who like act superior and tell people that they would rather do something than watch something, or as they like to put it “I don’t need to live vicariously through guys getting paid millions.” There is no arguing with these people, better to just let them go hike, bike, kayak, ski, or eat my fist. There are other types, but these guys are top of mind for me. As my friend Rob says about some of these guys, “they just have real hard time being dudes.” Well said.

Some of these people don’t like sports because they were never good at them and/or they were picked on by people who were. I get that. Some can’t get past how much money professional athletes get paid or how much money is in sports generally. I get that, too, but to a lesser degree because that person would look past the money if they actually liked the sport. And some people just don't like sports because they don't like sports, sort of like how I don't like most reality TV.

Since soccer is not a mainstream sport, at least in the U.S., and is considered almost counterculture in its own right, it may appeal to these non-sport-loving Seattle-area people. When I was growing up, soccer was always an alternative sport. Generally, the kids who played the sport were also the kids who were skateboarders. They had longer hair and were a little different. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Youth Soccer
While soccer on a professional level in the U.S. has not taken off, youth soccer has. With the amount of youth leagues around the country that has grown steadily for years, soccer has to be one, if not the, fastest growing sports among kids in the country. It makes perfect sense that the kids who grew up playing the sport (who are probably in their 30s now) will become fans of the local professional team. By extension, all of the parents who have driven their kids to practices and games over the years have been exposed to the game. They have no choice but to learn things about the game by seeing so much of it. I’m guessing that at least some of these parents are not big-three sports fans, and they may even be some of the other folks that I described above. The youth soccer market in the Seattle area exponentially grew over time without a professional franchise to rally around and that’s probably why the league will be successful here. The professional team wasn’t forced on these people. The demand was there because the grassroots stuff (youth soccer) tilled the ground for the MLS. People who grew up playing the sport, and their parents who watched them, know all of the nuances of the game and are therefore interested in watching professionals performing the game better than they’d ever seen in person before on a consistent basis.

Kevin Calabro
Don’t underestimate the Power of Calabro. People around here love him, for good reason, from his days calling games for the Sonics. I may tune in simply to listen to him call the game because I’m curious and I know that he’ll bring the proper amount of enthusiasm and knowledge to the game. He’s never done this before, but I’m guessing that he doesn’t want to embarrass himself by not understanding the game. He's a big draw for a non-soccer fan like me.

The Euro Factor
People around the Seattle area are Europhiles (myself included) and because soccer (futbol) is so pervasive in Europe I would be surprised if people weren’t fans of soccer, generally, because of this. It’s probably the reason people love to drink Heineken (me? I love the bottles).

Startups
Startups have a robust culture in Seattle. We’ve had a number of successes (when I say “we” I mean most everyone but me) in this area and we’ve had some fantastic flameouts (now I can be counted). Regardless, people here love startups and the Sounders are definitely that. Taken further, the MLS is a startup league. It’s cool to be part of something new; it makes people feel like they’re in on something, sort of like being part of a club. Being an early fan of the Sounders is considered a cool thing. It’s an intriguing aspect and cannot be discounted.

Player Salaries
MLS salaries are very low compared to the big-three sports. According to this Sports Illustrated story, the median income for players is $88,000, which is good money for playing a sport, but it’s nothing compared to the NFL, NBA, or MLB. The story also reports that the league minimum is $34,000 (40 players make this amount) and the “developmental” minimum is $21,100 (12 players make this amount). Because the majority of guys are making good, but not even close to great, money regular fans can relate to them more easily. These guys are also more likely to be a little more grounded simply because they aren’t unfathomably rich and can’t buy Boeing field if they wanted to. I’m guessing that many MLS players also play in other leagues, overseas, but still. They have more in common, salarywise, with WNBA players than they do NBA players.

Outside
The MLS season is perfectly timed with the best weather days of the year in Seattle. While the season ends in November, when it gets rainy and dreary here, the bulk of the season is in the sunny months. And people around here love to be outside during this time. This is another reason why the Mariners have such great attendance in Safeco Field. Obviously the success of the team right before and around the time they moved into the stadium had a lot to do with it, but trust me when I say that going to games in the Kingdome when I was a kid in the middle of July when it was 80 degrees out was a horrible experience (because we were inside and because the team consistently shat the bed). Being outside is a huge plus for the MLS in Seattle.

Game Time
One of the best things about soccer, regardless of the quality of play, is that there is constant action and there are no real breaks except for halftime. There are nominal breaks like penalty stuff and out-of-bounds stuff, but really the game keeps moving. Additionally, the 45 minute running halves is awesome. The fluidity of the game is one of its best attributes and makes the game very fan-friendly.

Songs
I don’t know if this has already happened with the Sounders or not, but European soccer leagues all have songs that are pretty much yelled by fans throughout the games. It's fantastic. During the World Cup, the fans of Countries sing songs and I have no idea what they're saying and it's great. If one hasn't been created for the Sounders already, I hope that one emerges. It would be great if the song develops organically because of something that happens surrounding the team. Or they could ship in a bunch of Brazilian Betties with whistles and tube tops and have them cavort around. Either way.

What I’ll Do
I’m not sure what I’m going to do. To this point I have ignored the Sounders. Not because I dislike them or dislike soccer, but I guess I just don’t care yet. I have several impediments to Sounders, or MLS, acceptance. They are, in no particular order:

I don’t know the game, I don’t know how to tell if a player is doing something right or doing something wrong. And for me to enjoy something, I need to know what the hell I'm talking about
All I can tell is if a guy is fast and can handle the ball and make precise passes
I can’t tell why a guy, who everyone says has great ball control, can miss a goal by kicking it 20 feet wide or over the goal. To me, it seems like a good jumpshooter shooting 15 percent but when he misses, he airballs by five feet. I don’t know why this is so and perhaps I’ll learn, but having never played the sport I don’t know how hard it is to do some of the things they do. That said, they’re professionals, so anything I could have done would be laughable by comparison.
I don’t know how many teams are in the MLS
I don’t who what cities are represented
I don’t know how many divisions there are
I don’t know how many teams make the playoffs
I don’t know the playoff format
I don’t know what the championship game is called even though I heard two weeks ago that the Sounders will host the game at Qwest Field
I don’t know how many players are on the roster
I don’t know if there is a salary cap
I don’t know if it’s a young man’s game or if veterans rule
I don’t know how many games they play
I’m not 100 percent sure if I could describe the offsides rule
I don't know the league will survive

I may take the time and effort to learn any of those things and get involved in with the team. But I don’t know if I’ll truly ever care. One of my big hang-ups is that I may feel like a poser for jumping on board; kind of like some of the “football” fans who decided that they liked the Seahawks in 2003.

The team won’t miss me, but will I miss my chance to get in on the ground floor? It wouldn’t be the first time.

Great Eight - Saturday

2009-03-28T22:04:00.000-07:00

I picked Pitt to win the tournament and I’m not ashamed that I did so. That team has stones and it’s a damn shame that the Villanova – Pitt game was not the final because no remaining game is going to top that one. Pitt is not a pretty team, but they are tough and hit big shots. That pretty much describes LeVance (I’m going uppercase V) Fields. He’s actually pretty gross-looking out there. He’s not fast and takes some pretty crappy shots, but hits them and makes great passes. He simply does not look the part, but plays the part. I love the guy. DeJuan Blair is a Brahma Bull. That and1 he got in the first half was awesome. The Nova defender tried to knock him off course by fouling him hard when Blair was in the air, but he ended exploding on impact while Blair’s body continued on course. He’s a nice player who simply abuses college defenders. We’ll see how it translates to the NBA but why can’t he be a better Jason Maxiel? His ceiling is Elton Brand because of his long arms. I’d rather pick at 25 and take him than be at 3 and pick Hasheem Thabeet… or a guy like James Harden (I dislike his game). Old man Sam Young is a great player too, damn shame they lost the game.

While I really like Pitt’s squad, I equally love Nova. Neither of those teams deserved to lose, but as Snoop Pearson (and Clint Eastwood) says, “deserve ain’t got nothing to do with it.” Nova plays such great defense with active hands and positioning. The most entertaining matchup has got to be Nova – Louisville, let’s hope that happens. I guess UConn – UNC would be nice also, but those two schools get enough strokes as it is.

Aside from the way that Nova and Pitt played, the game revealed two other things:

1. Nova’s uniforms are cool. Their colors are the same as the coolest basketball unis on the planet, which belong to Argentina.

2. Pitt’s Tyrell Biggs looks exactly like Michael Olowokandi.

I’m saddened by Missouri’s exit from the Big Dance, those cats are enjoyable to watch. They force teams to run with them and make them to all kinds of stupid stuff that they wouldn’t normally do, plus they are fearless. Unfortunately they just couldn’t stop Kemba Walker (who is going to be superb) and Stanley Robinson (who was everything for UConn on Saturday). As good as UConn is, I am unimpressed by AJ Price, that guy makes some dumbass plays. They seem to be in much better hands when Walker is running the show. Also, Jeff Adrien looks like the second coming of Charles Oakley. His game is very similar and he, like Oakley, probably could put his hand on the ground and rush the passer as a D-End. He didn’t do too much in this game though.

One thing to think about as we await the UNC – Oklahoma game:

how in the world does Tony Crocker play in a long sleeve shirt?

I’d pass out from heat exhaustion in 5 minutes wearing that thing.

Sweet Sixteen

2009-03-28T11:04:00.000-07:00

One of the first things that I noticed about the Sweet Sixteen regional games was the stadiums and the massive swaths of empty seats. I’m guessing that they have these games in huge football stadiums because they don’t want to run out of tickets, but the end result is an embarrassing scene whereby it seems as though no one cares about the games. It’s weird. Just hold the games in basketball arenas and if they’re sold out, so what. There is no need (and apparently, no demand) have 75,000 people at a basketball game because about 7/8ths of the people won’t have a very good sightline to the action anyway.

To the games themselves …

I haven’t seen much of UConn this year and I almost feel bad for Hasheem Thabeet. Almost. The guy is going to be a lottery pick and never have to sit at a desk and do real work, ever, so I can’t feel too bad for him. What I mean by this is that during the game, his teammates don’t look to him much and I can tell that he gets frustrated. But, on the other hand, he’s not very skilled offensively and still does really stupid stuff like bring the ball low or dribble it in the post when there is no need to do so. But all young big guys do this, so it’s not just him. I think commentators pick apart his game because he is so huge and has some ability, he’ll be fine. But he is very limited athletically because he has a bit of a Calvin Booth thing going on where it looks like he’s running with George Clooney in “O Brother, Where Art Thou” in shackles. Also, if you just saw Thabeet from the waist up, you’d think he’d be a relatively slender, spy dude, but then from the waist down he looks very heavy, kind of like a weeble-wobble. That’ll probably help anchor him in the post, but makes it very hard to run (and watch him run…) I was going to bash him, but he’s actually good and can get a ton better.

Um, Dick Enberg, maybe it’s time to step aside and let another play-by-play guy get a shot. Time to hang up the mic. I’ll give him this though, he’s resilient. He keeps coming back even when networks force him to do those sappy, crappy puff pieces. I’d take those as a hint to get out of the game, but he still brings it. It’s not like he’s lost his fastball, he’s throwing with the other arm now.

Here are two more applicants for the Anti-Baby Face Team:

Xavier's B.J. Raymond
Pitt's Sam Young (who rivals previously mentioned Dallas Lauderdale as the overall No. 1 seed)

That Pitt – Xavier game was fantastic, even if it was more of battle of offensive attrition than actually stellar defense. I was still riveted. Levance Fields is Khalid El-Amin reincarnated. Both of those dudes are so portly, but successful (in college, anyway). Also, shouldn’t the “v” in Levance be capitalized? I’d switch that up if I was him. I humbly submit that “LeVance” looks cooler than “Levance.” One great scene that occurred at the 1:20 mark remaining in the game was a loose ball that traveled from Pitt’s side of the court to Xavier’s side. Derrick Brown (no. 5) hustled and ran the ball down, but stepped out. The ref called it and Brown started stomping his feet and bitching to the ref and Dante Jackson (no. 25) sprinted over to Brown and screamed at the top of his lungs “SHUT THE F**K UP!” right in Brown’s face and the camera caught it. Great moment. I’m a little saddened that Raftery didn’t say anything about that, perhaps he didn’t see it. Something like, “Jackson’s giving some life lessons to Brown right now.”

I love, absolutely love, what Villanova did to Duke. Nova looked so damn superior in every single aspect of the game. They were bigger, stronger, faster, better shooters, played tough defense. It was awesome. Nova looks like a very strong title contender right now. The cool thing about the teams remaining in the tournament is that four of the eight teams remaining play crazy fast, pressure basketball. Here are the regular season averages of the eight teams:

1. UNC – 90.5
2. Missouri –81.6
3. Oklahoma – 79.2
4. UConn – 78.4
5. Pitt – 77.5
6. Nova – 77.0
7. Louisville – 74.9
8. Michigan State – 72.0

Two of these teams, Louisville (103) and Missouri (102), hung a Franklin on Arizona and Memphis. I guess I’m saying that I’m looking forward to a possible Louisville – Missouri game. Someone, please make this happen.

Speaking of the Arizona – Louisville game, just sitting in my TV room watching this game I felt intimidated by Louisville’s athleticism and cockiness. I could just feel them making fun of me. I felt the same way about Memphis’s team last year. Louisville just seems to come after teams wave after wave. It’s a trademark of Pitino teams, but this squad seems like it’s really put together perfectly to pull it off. Arizona has great athletes and everyone knew that their depth could be an issue, but it was pretty shocking to see them get so roundly dismantled. Michigan State has steady players who are tough, so this game is going to be very interesting.

That Gonzaga – UNC game was terrible. Gonzaga played no semblance of a defense and UNC shot the hell out of the ball. Ty Lawson looked absolutely perfect out there. He could be an outstanding RB if he wanted to be one by the way. He’s strong and has fantastic balance and speed. I didn’t know that his jumper was so milky either, of course, when no one guards you it makes it a lot easier, but still. Hansbrough played a solid game and hit open jumpers. He’s got a shot in the NBA, much more so than I gave him credit for. He looks to be just as relentless as Jon Brockman, although he’s not as thick as him. They both have the same short arm, not explosive issues, but Hansbrough is an exponentially better shooter than Brockman which makes him less of a liability offensively. I could see him being a role player on a good team, like third or fourth big man, which is not too shabby. Bouldin and Heytveldt, two guys who absolutely needed to have good if not great games for Gonzaga to win, were non-factors in the game, which is very disappointing. It didn’t seem like UNC’s defense caused them to be ineffective, they just had off nights, both of them. Too bad.

It sounds like Austin Daye may put his name in the draft and not hire an agent. Smart move, but I'd be surprised if he left. The feedback that he's going to get isn't going to be very positive, but he can improve upon things (and his draft position) if he stays. He simply needs to get bigger and stronger (and stop bitching so much). Bouldin would be an absolute fool if he left, which I doubt he'll do.

Pulling for Purdue

2009-03-26T12:11:00.000-07:00

Fans experience an interesting phenomenon in postseason settings when the team that they follow is eliminated from contention. These fans fall into two groups:

Fans who align with the team that eliminated their team, and
Fans who align with the team that opposes the team that eliminated their team.

I’m ignoring a third group of fans who don’t care one way or the other because their Swiss-like neutral perspective is boring; much like I ignorantly perceive Switzerland to be having never been there myself. I just know that it’s expensive and that they’ve got banks, I know this because I’ve watched Matt Damon’s Bourne movies.

As a sports fan in the Seattle area, I have experienced this tug of allegiance numerous times in recent history because my teams fail to advance (or even enter) in the postseason.

Most recently, this allegiance question focuses on Purdue.

Here are two some possible thoughts fans may be having and the reasons that they feel the way that they do:

I’m rooting for the team that beat my team to validate that while my team lost, at least it lost to a good team.

Clearly this fan is adopting a loser’s mentality, but it is pervasive and has some merit. Many people feel this way. It also makes some sense because while it’s a loser’s mentality, there’s a reason for that that: Because the team this fan roots for LOST.
I’m rooting for the team that beat my team to play well because I don’t want my team to look bad for losing to a team that gets its ass handed to it in the next round.

This fan roots this way because he doesn’t want his team (that already lost, mind you) to look bad. This thinking is somewhat convoluted because the team already looks bad because it did lose, but to lose to a team that looks bad makes his team look much worse. It’s like losing twice and constantly makes this fan think “Why couldn’t they play like that when they faced us!?” or worse, “We’re so bad we lost to garbage team.” Neither alternative is good.

Both scenarios are face-saving justifications, but I tend to go with number 2 because it seems like the fan is still primarily focused on his team and is slightly more negative at its core, which sums me up nicely.

Another phenomenon that creeps up occasionally by some twist of fate is focused not on the team that beat the fan’s team, but is more outwardly focused on the opponent of that team. In this case: the hated (and evidently cheating) UConn Huskies.

UConn has dramatically ended tourney runs by UW twice in the last decade. One was Rip Hamilton’s buzzer beater that makes me want rip up the carpet in my TV room, find anyone with any ties to UConn, roll them up in the carpet, and kick the carpet down a hill into oncoming traffic anytime I see it. (By the way, thanks, a lot CBS for constantly replaying that goddamn commercial, it’s not funny. Why didn’t Patrick Femerling tip the ball high into the air? Why are you doing this to me?)

Thinking of UConn also reminds me of Mike Jensen’s brainlocked foul on Marcus Williams… it’s killing me just thinking about it. By the way, I was born in Connecticut and own a UConn sweatshirt that my dad brought back from a visit he took back east. I guess this means that I'm should roll myself up in the carpet... I really should burn that thing and flush the ashes down the toilet, although I’m sure it would clog my pipes and cause the sewer to back up; such is the power that the Eastern Huskies wield over me.

So, instead of just rooting for Purdue to save face, I’m rooting against UConn for historical, pain-inducing reasons. That’s double rooting interest coming from my house, which should be more than enough to topple Calhoun and his merry bunch of thieves and hooligans (that’s unfair, but I don’t care right now). Go Boilers.

The Purdue/UConn scenario also applied to the Super Bowl last year because of the visceral hate that Seahawks fans have for the Pittsburgh Steelers as a result of that horrible game in Detroit in 2005. As I’ve written in the past, I, like many others, was pulling for Arizona in that game. My hate for Pittsburgh was mighty and my desire for an NFC West team to win was much less mighty, but it was there.

A similar rooting-interest corollary arises when a fan’s team is eliminated, or didn’t make the tournament/playoffs at all. It’s interesting to see how people feel when this happens. I enjoy watching games where I’ve got a rooting interest, that’s obvious. I don’t gamble, so that’s out, I’m talking about pure, emotional interest. There are times when I watch a game and I really don’t care who wins, but it’s impossible for me to not lean one way or another, oftentimes for no good reason. For instance, when I was watching Florida State play Wisconsin I couldn’t care less who won, but I did pick Wisconsin in my bracket, so you’d think I’d be pulling for them. But I hate their style of play so much that I was definitely pulling for Florida State. There are times when I root for the underdog because it’s fun to do that, but there are times when I root for the favorite because it almost disgraces the game if the favorite loses to such a gross team like Wisconsin.

Yet another reason for rooting for a team is proximity. I’m rooting for Gonzaga for the simple fact that they are from Washington. If this same cast of characters and the same coach were based out of Texas, or worse, Oregon, then I’m certain I wouldn’t give them a second thought. I wouldn’t care about a guy like Micah Downs who looks like he definitely would be Eminem’s best friend in “Eight Mile.” But since he’s from Washington, I pull for him. I definitely would hate Matt Bouldin for the simple, adolescent, preposterous reason that he has longer-than-normal, messy hair. I’m petty that way sometimes. But I like the guy because he plays in Washington (and is a very good player). Austin Daye would receive the heat of my fury for being a waste of size and skills, but he plays for a team in Washington (wait, that one doesn’t work because I kill him now despite who he plays for—scratch that one). I’m even pulling for Arizona because they play in the Pac10. But I’m also pulling for Louisville because Terrance Williams is from Seattle—worlds colliding in that one. Since I have Louisville in the title game, I suppose that’s the trump card.

I don’t know what will happen if both Purdue and UConn fail to advance to the Final Four, but I’m sure I’ll figure something else out. Maybe I’ll figure out a way to root against Missouri because they fired Quinn Snyder who is from Washington…

Seahawks Moves and ABF

2009-03-22T11:31:00.001-07:00

Seahawks Observations

Leonard Weaver
His contract demands couldn’t have been very high since he signed with Philly for 1 year/2.5 million. Seeing that number, I’m surprised that they didn’t keep him around since he said he wanted to stay. He’s said in interviews that he can do all of the traditional fullback things, but I’m not sold on that, and neither was the new regime. Looks like Mora and co. like what they have in Owen Schmidt and I’m excited to see if he can reproduce what he did at West Virginia. It also seems apparent that they are going to need to draft an HB (in the late rounds), which is something I favor. Young RBs produce in the NFL.

Bobby Engram
I’ll miss him if only because Hasselbeck seemed to trust him, but I understand why he left. Seattle wasn’t going to pay him because I’m sure that they consider him to be too old and now that they’ve dedicated so much cash to the WR position with Burleson, Branch, and now Houshmanzadeh. Engram was hurt last year and while he’s been relatively healthy injury-wise, the older these guys get, the more injuries creep up. They were wise to let him go. I wish him well in KC, he’s got a real chance to help out there.

Colin Cole & Cory Redding
I’m intrigued by both of these guys since they’re relatively young (both are 28). I like Cole’s size at 330 and he should team nicely with Mebane. It sounds like Redding is going to play DE predominantly, and I’m surprised by that, but he’ll probably play both and that’s fine. I’d be surprised and more than a little disappointed if they draft a DT at No. 4 now. While Mebane has worked out wonderfully and Bryant showed some flashes before he was injured, the looming specter of Marcus Tubbs’s knee makes me want to go hide under my bed.

TJ Houshmanzadeh
I like TJ. He catches everything and this team needs that. We have no idea how Burleson is going to be the year after his ACL surgery. As has been reported and commented on many times, it usually takes two years to recover from ACL surgery, why would Burleson be any different? I hope I’m wrong because he’s a good player when healthy. TJ will become a trusted guy in this offense (especially with Engram leaving) very quickly because of his ability to catch the ball, regardless of who is playing QB this fall. All Seattle fans want Hasselbeck to be the guy, but we’d all be kidding ourselves if we’re not worried that he’s going to go down again. I nearly cut out my own kidneys when he took that hit to the knee against the Giants last year.

Julian Peterson
Speaking of the Giants game, I recall a specific play where Brandon Jacobs decided to treat Julian Peterson like he was me, and simply shoved him out of his way when Peterson tried to tackle him. Granted, Jacobs weighs over 260, but it’s not like Peterson is soft, but he is slightly undersized despite being tree-root ripped. It was at this point that I decided that I’d like for Seattle to beef up its LBs. Then watching the playoffs and seeing just how damn physical teams like Pittsburgh, Baltimore, and Tennessee were made me want to see something like that here. I have no idea who they’ll go after to fill his spot. It doesn’t make sense to plug in anyone that they’ve currently got on the roster, Lewis, Laury, and Herring are nice backups and special teams guys, but I want someone who is bigger and more physical. Seems to me that the right place to go for this position is in the draft because of the cash they’ve got tied up in Tatupu and Hill.

I was not and am not a fan of Peterson’s point-at-the-name-on-the-back-of-his-jersey-please-throw-a-fifteen-yard-unsportsmanlike-conduct-flag-on-me move. He’s known as a team guy, but pointing at his name, as if what he just did had absolutely nothing to do with the rest of his team, is paradoxical behavior for a team guy. Very strange.

Despite the showboating, I loved what Peterson brought to the table. He was aggressive and versatile, although not as versatile as some might have you believe. He could drop back in coverage and he could rush the passer, but he certainly cannot lock anyone down. I noticed tight ends running by him on several occasions and thought that he should have been able to keep up with them and I was always disappointed when he didn’t. I expected more out of him because he looks the part (Exhibit 1 is the picture on the left, which is absurd. There is no reason to ever pose for something like this unless you were paid, and paid well) and is a good guy, as mentioned above.

I’ll miss his play on the field, but the Hawks made a good move by getting a little younger and filling a position of need, especially with Kerney getting older and his propensity to get injured.

From a non-football perspective, like Greg Oden, Peterson is just one of those guys who looks a lot older than he is. He has an ABF (Anti Baby Face). I mean, look at this photo from his senior year at Michigan State. Tell me he doesn’t look like he’s in his mid 30s in that picture.

I can easily envision him playing MC Eiht’s “A-Wax” on “Menace II Society” as an OG who is still in the game, but doesn’t do too much dirt anymore. Of course, since he’s from the DC area “The Wire” would work too, although there is probably a lot of beef between DC guys and Baltimore guys. Regardless, I can definitely picture him in a Stringer Bell role, holding court, and saying stuff like “Let them young ‘uns hannle that,” convincingly. I’m aware that I’m typecasting the man, but he could also play Rip Hamilton, w/o the mask because those two dudes look a lot alike (except Rip is only Hamilton’s nickname, while Peterson is actually ripped.).

We all know guys that look prematurely old, and it’s an interesting phenomenon. Do these guys continue to look older than they are when they’re actually old? When they reach the age that people thought they were when they were 18 (say 35) do they actually look 35? When Greg Oden is 35 will he look like he’s 35 or will he look he’s 55? When he’s 55 will he look like he’s dead? I’m hoping that he actually starts to look his age and will go from a “guy who looks older than he is” to a “guy who looks his age” and then he’ll start to be a “guy who looks young for his age.” Hair plays a key role here and Oden looks like he’s got a fantastic, Marques-Johnson-like hairline that will not betray him in his advanced age. He does look like he’ll go prematurely gray though because it’s evident that he worries so much.

After watching Gonzaga beat Akron Thursday, I noticed another candidate to join the anti-baby face club: I give you Chris McKnight. His brother Brett looked like a candidate on TV, but. sadly, his picture doesn’t do him justice, because he looks like Randy Wagstaff here, and that kid is 14 or 15.

Dallas Lauderdale, a forward for Ohio State, joins the club as well since he looks like a 45-year old, prison guard, who just wants to come home and have a cigarette and watch the game in his well-worn leather chair.

Second Round Thoughts

2009-03-22T11:19:00.000-07:00

My friend, Josh, bought two tickets off of eBay on Friday night for the Saturday games in Portland, OR. He’s a UW fan and he and his dad wanted to see them trounce Purdue and step into the Sweet Sixteen. Evidently, Purdue JuJuan Johnson had other plans and now UW is heading home. He did get his money’s worth though because he saw two of the best possible games the NCAA Tournament can feature and were literally decided in the final seconds.

Some thoughts on the two games:

UW v. Purdue
Evidently Purdue plays good defense. I didn’t see them play all year, but when I read descriptions of the squad, they sounded a lot like Washington State. This was not a lazy team. They pressure the ball relentlessly, and may not get a lot of steals, but they limit penetration and contest shots. They are an incredibly active team that chases down rebounds. While some rebounds they got were purely serendipitous, even round balls bounce funny sometimes, they put themselves in position to grab loose balls and UW could not secure easy boards after misses. It was sickening to watch UW get stop after stop, then misjudge the ball, and watch it land in a Purdue player’s hands for an easy layup or jumper. For a team like UW that rebounds the hell out of the ball, this was disheartening, and this is where the game was lost. If Purdue doesn’t get those second chances, the game is not close, but they did, and UW lost.

There were several other things contributing to the loss, however, such as the inability to know when to take good shots (Pondexter’s turnaround at the end of the game when all of his success came from driving to the hoop) or to take any shots at all (Dentmon continued his bizarre passivity by shooting only 8 times this game and pump-faking and passing approximately 30 times). They were unable to stop JuJuan Johnson from being awesome, they guy made some very tough shots and grabbed key rebounds to keep possessions alive. I admired his game, he was huge. Elston Turner not taking open threes. He took, and made, one, but then passed on another. Instead of taking that wide-open shot, he pumped and dribbled in for a baseline floater. I’m not a fan of gunners, but he’s the best shooter they have and it’s actually more selfish of him to not take that three because it hurts the team. It’s a minor thing, but as it turns out a pile of minor things equals going home instead of going to the Sweet Sixteen. He’s young, though, as are many key contributors on this team, so their future looks bright—although I do have concerns as I’ll describe below.

Now some good things… Brockman played a nearly perfect game for him. He did not force things offensively. He bullied anyone and everyone. He took and made layins. I love the way he played and I shudder a bit when I think of the team next year without him. As much as I’ve urinated on his offensive (scoring) game, his ability to go balls-to-the wall is something that will be hard, probably impossible, to replicate. I’m not the least bit convinced that MBA will be able to do this. He’s not tough enough (but who is?) right now and doesn’t seem to have that same drive (but who does?). I guess he’s talented, but he does not seem comfortable or in control of his body yet. The only hope is that Tyreese Breshers will be a similar type of player.

Isaiah Thomas was fantastic. He played with the type of fire and urgency that the team needed. He was fearless the way he kept penetrating and either scoring, getting fouled, or dishing to Brockman. I loved the way he played, even if he did miss some free throws. I’m shocked that his final layin attempt failed, it was the right play, but it just didn’t drop.

Great season by UW, but it’s a damn shame that they’re going home.

Gonzaga v. Western Kentucky
My friend Joel is a huge Gonzaga fan so when I called him during the game to tell him how much I loved Matt Bouldin’s game, here’s what he said: “I have a mancrush on him, he’s my favorite player in college basketball.” I can see why. I’ve watched him intently these last two games and a few things are clear:

he’s a big, strong, guy
he’s got tremendous court vision
he’s aggressive when the game calls for him to be aggressive
he has a good-looking jumper
he’s not quick or fast, but he's savvy
he’s decent on defense, but somewhat disinterested (looks like he sags off of his guys a bit too much when the ball is on the other side of the court)
he is definitely an NBA player.

Joel and I talked about the possibility of him playing point guard in the NBA and it seems like a real possibility to me. At 6’5 225 he’s a much bigger, much better version of Steve Blake, who happens to be starting for the playoff-bound Blazers and playing over 30 minutes a game.

We also talked about Austin Daye, of course, and Joel compared his game to Dirk Nowitski, which is probably accurate from a skillset perspective, but a more apt comparison and a guy whose game he really emulates is Mehmet Okur. Now, Okur has about 70 lbs on Daye, but they play the same. Okur is perimeter-oriented, 6’11, and slow footed. This is Austin Daye. The comment that he's a "guard" are ridiculous. He's way, way, way too slow to guard any decent 2 or even a 3.

The game itself was one of the best I’ve ever seen. These two teams shot the damn lights out. Both teams shot over 50% from the field and over 42% from beyond the arc. Amazing. The game was extremely close throughout and neither team could gain a significant advantage.

Orlando Mendez-Valdez and A.J. Slaughter were in such a zone they were communicating with animals, existing and extinct. They were supernatural and would not let their team down. They could have beaten any team yesterday, Gonzaga was just able to hang on and make a great play at the end.

When Gonzaga plays UNC they need, absolutely need, to get the ball to Heytvelt so that he can take Tyler Hansbrough's virginity; this matchup, friends, is a mismatch in size and talent. Heytveldt is such a superior player and it’s the smart move to get the ball to him.

Here are a few random thoughts about Wisconsin. That is a gross team. As much as I can figure, it seems like their “offense” is this: pass the ball around the court. Pump fake. Pass some more. Take a crappy three with five seconds on the shot clock. They shoot 36% from three, so I guess it’s not such a terrible way to play, but I’d rather rub a cheese grater on my face than sit through another game with those guys in it again. Keep them off of my screen, CBS.

Thoughts on Round One (UW and Gonzaga, only)

2009-03-20T17:29:00.000-07:00

UW
Pondexter looked great offensively yesterday, but I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t point out that he fell asleep on defense and let his man (No.5, Osby) grab an offensive rebound and flush it with two hands. Pondexter had no idea where he was and helped someone else block out their man. I can’t kill him for that because he had a great game, but the little stuff like that can haunt teams in close games. He’s got to be aware and I’m sure his coaches let him know it. I'm a hard guy to please when it comes to teams I root for, it's something they have to live with. Seeing as how they have no idea who I am, and coulnd't possibly care less by the way, they're getting along just fine despite my constant haranguing.

I’m bummed for Dentmon. It’s obvious that the guy wants to be a leader and go out with a bang, but putting up only six shots is lunacy. He passed up many what I would consider “good” shots by pump-faking and passing or pump-faking and making a less-than-aggressive effort to drive into the lane. It’s possible that he just didn’t trust his jumper last night and if that’s the case, then he should be commended for not taking shots. Confidence is a huge part of shooting and if he wasn’t feeling it and his jumper felt forced, then good for him for lying off. Hopefully he’ll be ready to go on Saturday.

Brockman hit the deck after that rebound like he was thrown out of a 10-story building. He landed completely on his side. It’s amazing to me that he didn’t stay on the ground, although why would I be amazed at this point? He doesn’t feel pain like a regular human does. Nevertheless, I’d advise him to try not to emulate John Malcovich at the end of “In the Line of Fire” again. Great, aggressive game by him though. It’s exactly what I like to see out of him—easy buckets around the rim, good, physical defense, leadership (I distinctly remember him talking to Overton and telling him to settle down) and maniacally obsessive pursuit of the ball for rebounds.

Overton is a straight-up menace. It would be so painful to try and bring the ball up the floor against him. Weak guards will get tormented. He’s like GP used to be from a yappy, aggressive, and quickness perspective. My friend Chris pointed out that Overton beat MSU’s guards to the spot every single time and he got called for fouls only when he reached (which he doesn’t need to do). He’s impressive. I’m amazed that none of MSU’s players threw a haymaker his way, although it could be argued that the hit he took on that screen qualified. Through his own aggression and quickness he nearly got himself killed. People get jacked up on screens all of the time, but most people don’t run, with their head turned, the equivalent of a 4.3 40 straight into a 6’9 245 lb guy. Despite nearly ending his own life, on the very next play he takes the ball coast-to-coast and lays it in. He’s a tough S.O.B. As an aside, that pseudo-alley oop dunk was both impressive and pathetic at the same time if that makes sense.

One last guy I’ll mention is Darnell Gant. If he develops a reliable 12-15 footer he’s going to be great for this team. He’s not called upon to score, that’s obvious, but he’s left open so often that he needs to get that part of his game going. He will never be called on to put the ball on the floor and create like Pondexter does, but people will double off of him and he has a chance to diversify this team and increase his playing time. His defense is great and he’s learning how to play hard just by being on the same court as Brockman. He’s got a chance to be a real difference maker and I’m excited about his future. It’s pretty amazing that he’s only a freshman.

Gonzaga
I’ve been killing Austin Daye every chance I get because I think that he’s a pansy, but he looked very good last night, especially defensively. It’s nearly impossible to get a shot off against him on the perimeter and it’s is truly impossible to get a good look at the hoop if he’s playing up on his guy. For as thin as he is, he’s has no quickness or speed at all, so he definitely needs to add about 30 lbs to take advantage of his size. If his game was all about using his size and quickness then it would make sense for him to remain around 190 or 200, but he isn’t that kind of player. Last night, while he looked good out there, he got shoved around. If he fills out he can be a force. I don’t know what it would take for him to get a little nasty (probably nothing because he’s probably a really nice kid who just doesn’t have it in him to be a killer) but if he added some bulk and aggression he would be a nice player.

I love Heytvelt, 'shrooms aside, that guy is a player. He has that nasty streak that Daye lacks, and perhaps Daye just needs time to grow up a little. He’s only a sophomore. Heytveldt has a bit of a strange looking jumper where his whole body is completely erect, but it’s effective. I like how strong he is and his desire to finish strong around the rim. He looked great last night and if he keeps playing like that, I was wrong to have the Zags lose to UNC. They’ll beat that team if they play like they did in the second half.

Bouldin looked good last night too. He’s got a great feel for the game and his size causes problems for opposing guards. I like his game.

I don’t like Pargo’s game very much but his leaner dunk was shocking. I know he has ups, but that was an out-of-nowhere flush. I could tell that he was going to try because he had that kind of bounce when he got near the rim, but I did not expect him to finish like that. Filthy.

Final Bracket

2009-03-19T06:43:00.000-07:00

Final Bracket. I switched UNC and Oklahoma.

Hated Guys, Adam Morrison, and Ken Griffey Jr.

2009-03-18T12:50:00.000-07:00

As I went through the bracket the other day and I got to Duke and North Carolina, it made me think of how much players on their teams are hated. This topic has generated tons of stories in the print, online, radio, and television media. I saw this from The Big Lead (it was linked off of the Dan Patrick Show) this morning and, while interesting, it’s the same type of thing that I’ve seen anywhere else.

What's missing is why the media “wonders” why certain guys were considered the most hated college basketball players in their time. As if it’s a big mystery why people couldn’t stand Christian Laettner, Bobby Hurley, JJ Redick, Adam Morrison, Jon Scheyer, and Tyler Hansbrough, to name a few. Notice anything similar about them? The Duke thing notwithstanding, they’re all white guys who played significant roles on their teams. (Yes, I realized Hasheem Thabeet is black, hard to miss a 7’3 guy, but he’s not a universally hated guy on the level of the other names above, no one is publishing his cell phone number and calling him).White guys are easy targets for student fans attending games because most of those kids are white. Scan the student section of any school and you’re not going to find a lot of non-white faces. Maybe some Asian kids will be sprinkled in, but you sure won’t see a huge faction of black kids jumping in unison with their faces painted yelling “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” So it makes perfect sense why those guys are targeted. It’s a lot easier for these kids to target opposing players who look like them because they are familiar and there is no downside to it. If they razz Scheyer on the court and call him names, make posters, post his cell phone number and the like, then they’re spirited college kids and create a great college atmosphere. If they treated a guy like Terrance Williams from Louisville the same way, then there’s a pretty good chance that they’d be considered racist. Not that college kids are above being racist, but in a public setting like, say a college basketball game on national TV, they would probably refrain, that and they’re probably scared of him in a way that they’re not scared of guys like Jon Scheyer.

Add the fact that each of those guys, except Morrison, were around for four years and you can see why a fan base would grow to hate them.

Also, I remain baffled as to why draft experts were saying that Morrison was going to be a marketing wonder for whichever franchise drafted him. I didn’t understand it then and I don’t understand it now. What exactly, besides his whiteness, is appealing about Morrison? He’s a poster child for athletes suffering from type I diabetes. He is to be commended for being able to function at the highest of levels with this disease. I’ll give him that. But outside of his ability to excel despite having a debilitating disease, it’s my understanding that he’s a real jackass, perhaps he’s mellowed because he’s been humbled and exposed as a pretty substandard NBA player, but when he was in college his aloofness and overall “I’m superior” attitude was well known.

He could play, but he was a jerk. So aside from his preposterous mustache, shaggy hair, anti-establishment, Che Guevera clichéd persona, and whiteness made him such a guarantee to be a marketing machine? If a player is good, makes himself available to fans through the media, and is cool to fans in appearances and charity work he will be a god in whatever town he’s in. There is no question. Many people in US cities are highly provincial and are very protective and sensitive about where they live. If a player shows even the slightest interest or pride in the city that he plays for, he will have fans eating out of his hand. It’s such a simple concept, but many players don’t get it or simply don’t care. Seattle is no different. Ray Allen immediately made an impression with the people of Seattle by taking out an ad in the local newspapers introducing himself to the city and its fans. It was such an easy thing to do and even if he didn’t mean anything that he said, he still had them.

Some guys transcend that though just because they are so damn good it doesn’t matter if they’re jerks. Ken Griffey Jr. is one of those guys. I know nothing about him on a personal level, but I do know how he sounds when he speaks about Seattle. People here love him because of what he meant to the Mariners in the late 80s and all of the 90s. He was widely considered the best player in baseball and he was ours. It was like dating the hottest girl in school and doing anything and everything for her and forgetting about all of those times when she went out on the town and danced with random dudes and didn’t even bother calling you and then not apologizing for her behavior. You forgive all of that because she is so hot and you don’t want to mess that up. Griffey would be extremely cold to the local media; which, by extension, meant that he was extremely cold toward the fans. When he re-signed here in Seattle recently people desperately wanted him to make very overt statements about how much he loves it in Seattle and he owes it to himself and to the fans to return here and retire as a Mariner, all that b.s. He kind of did that, but not as overtly many people wanted him to. Also, when a local sports radio guy, Mike Gastineau, asked him if he feels like Seattle needs some good news because of the Sonics leaving and the terrible season the Seahawks had, and that he could provide that, Griffey distanced himself from the situation dismissively by saying (I’m paraphrasing here), “Hey, I live in Florida, I don’t really follow it.” That was weak, but Griffey doesn’t care. He doesn’t care about the people in Seattle one bit. He cares about the closure this move could mean for him and his career, but he doesn’t care what anydude in Seattle thinks of him, really. He just wants them to cheer for him and praise his every step. I loved Griffey back in the day, because he was a great baseball player, but those days are long gone. I see no need to date him any longer.

Initial March Madness Thoughts - Part II

2009-03-17T12:30:00.000-07:00

For Initial March Madness Thoughts - Part I, click here.

On to the East, South, and final predictions.

EAST

(1) Pittsburgh v. (16) East Tennessee State: Pitt is an extremely tough team that plays great defense and pushes people around. I like their team’s long-term prospects.

Pick: Pitt

(8) Oklahoma State v. (9) Tennessee: This game was one of three where I had a lot of trouble deciding what to do. I breezed through the bracket, picking confidently (and surely errantly), but I had to come back to this game. The trouble is that I don’t like this Tennessee team at all. But then I don’t trust this Oklahoma State team either after watching UW eviscerate them earlier this season. Additionally, I have nothing against headbands, but the way that the Tennessee guys wear them… the look like girls. There’s nothing wrong with girls or women’s basketball or whatever, but there is something wrong with looking like a female when you’re a male and not a transvestite. I can’t get past that look. I am fully aware that these headbands are monumentally meaningless and that my comments are bordering on misogyny, but I just hate that look. It doesn’t take much for me to latch onto irrational, inconsequential beliefs, and these headbands have done it. This is coming from a guy who enjoys SEC football and Tennessee football specifically.

Pick: Tennessee (grudgingly)

(5) Florida State v. (12) Wisconsin: As documented, I dislike Big 10 basketball. However, I can appreciate what the style can do to teams that aren’t talented enough to overcome Big 10 discipline. A team like Washington State plays Big 10 basketball and I can appreciate that, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it. Florida State seems like a team to me that will not be able to stay focused against an extraordinarily patient Wisconsin team.

Pick: Wisconsin

(4) Xavier v. (13) Portland State: I like what Ken Bone has done with this Portland State team and I like that they’ll be sort of close-to-home in Boise. They beat Gonzaga at Gonzaga after the Connecticut game. They nearly won at UW. They’re a nice team, but Xavier is better and is more experienced having advanced to the Great 8 last year. I don’t see PSU pulling this off.

Pick: Xavier

(6) UCLA v. (11) VCU: It’s really too bad for UCLA that Russell Westbrook and Kevin Love aren’t there anymore. This team would be positioned to do some great things if they were. Jrue Holiday isn’t providing the lift that I’m sure UCLA thought that he would provide. They just aren’t that good of a team offensively. Defensively they’re still nice, but I just don’t like their chances, and this looks to be a bad matchup against VCU. Also, I hate their uniforms. I’m a huge proponent of blue, especially powder/baby blue in unis, but for some reason I cannot buy in to UCLA’s gear. Football or basketball. I’m not sure what it is, but it could be the font. I just hate them. I loved Eric Maynor two years ago when he dismantled Duke and I can see him doing the same thing here. I like the guy and I don’t see anyone stopping him for UCLA, again, if Westbrook was still there, it would be a different story.

Pick: VCU

(3) Villanova v. (14) American: Nova is a real nice team. I love the way that these guys play. They’ve got boatloads of experience and are playing well. I like their long-term chances also. The only thing I know about American is that a kid from Issaquah goes there and scores a bit for them. They don’t stand a chance.

Pick: Villanova

(7) Texas v. (10) Minnesota: This was the second of three games that I couldn’t figure out what to think initially. Texas has lost two great players (Durant and Augustin) in two years and it’s got to be tough to recover from that. Minnesota is another Big 10 school that I can’t really get behind but was tempted to advance because of their defensive abilities, but I don’t think that they can score and Texas will be able to a little bit more.

Pick: Texas (in a close, and gross, game)

(2) Duke v. (15) Binghamton: I hate Duke more than I hate Big 10 basketball. It’s the constant fellating of Duke’s program and of Coach K that gets me the most. Yes. I understand that they are a great program. Yes. I understand that they play hard and he gets the most out of the guys he has (as evidenced by the utter lack of success that Duke players have had in the NBA). But I need it to stop and the only way that it stops is if they lose. I’m being shortsighted here, I realize, because if it’s not Duke, then it’ll just be some other team that gets jocked. I get that. But right now it’s Duke and I want it to end.

Here’s something that I find funny and so amazingly dated. Do you remember what a big deal it was when Elton Brand was thinking about declaring early for the NBA Draft? Coach K, to that point, had never had a player leave early. Never. That was about 10 years ago, but seems like 20. It’s hard to believe. But then 10 years ago middle-schoolers weren’t sending each other naked pictures of themselves on their cell phones either.

As for Duke’s team, I don’t like their style of play because they’re too in love with the jumper. Now I love a syrupy J as much as anyone, but teams that rely on the perimeter shot a little too often are destined for trouble because the shot isn’t always going to fall.

I read a story on Binghamton a few weeks ago in the “New York Times” about the troubles that the program is having with the hoop team. It’s amazing how much just 15 guys can have on the psyche of a school that has 11,515 undergraduate students. The hoop team makes up .001% of the student population and the administration and faculty act like someone strapped a used diaper to their faces. I enjoy the myth of the student athlete as much as the next guy, but don’t tell me that these guys are ruining the academic integrity of your institution. It’s embarrassing. The only reason that anyone even knows about these guys is because internal folks complain about it. So who’s hurting the institution more? The complainers, who draw attention to the “problem” or the .001% who no one knows?

Pick: Duke

SOUTH

(1) North Carolina v. (16) Radford: I’d be pretty nervous about the Ty Lawson injury, but it won’t matter at all in this game. I do not like their long-term prospects, with or without Lawson.

Pick: North Carolina

(8) LSU v. (9) Butler: It’s weird that Trent Johnson is at LSU because I can’t think of two more different cultures than Stanford and LSU, not that the basketball coaches have anything remotely to do with academics or anything else within the university. I was surprised that Butler got upended in its conference tournament, but not surprised that they are back in the dance with a pretty favorable seed and draw.

Pick: Butler

(5) Illinois v. (12) Western Kentucky: Courtney Lee is gone, but this team is still tough and I don’t like this Illinois team. This is a perfect candidate for a 12-5 “upset” (of course, I’ve chosen three of the 12 seeds to advance, but whatever).

Pick: Western Kentucky

(4) Gonzaga v. (13) Akron: I don’t know what to do with this Gonzaga team. They have very strong guard play from Pargo and Bouldin. I like Heytveldt a lot. Gray can shoot as well as anyone in the country. Downs is tantalizingly talented and versatile. Daye has so much ability, but is rotten-peach soft. This team really should be in Detroit in April, but I don’t know if they’ll be able to do it. The only thing I know about Akron is that their coach used to be LeBron’s High School coach, unless he’s got another No. 23 hoop wizard, the Zips aren’t going to advance.

Pick: Gonzaga

(6) Arizona State v. (11) Temple: I’m unnaturally high on Arizona State. I love Jeff Pendergraph, even if he is a little stiff-looking. He reminds me of Elden Campbell (although not as tall) a little bit the way he holds his head. It looks like he has to turn his whole body to the side if he wants to look left or right. James Harden is a filthy scorer who will be a good NBA player, but he’s not at all what a good player looks like. That Taliban/Leprechaun-level beard he’s got going is sick and his eyes and teeth look like they’ve been spayed with movie-popcorn butter. But he’s an nice player, despite the shaky appearance. Glasser is a damn good shooter and, as evidenced by the game against UW in the Pac 10 Tournament, won’t back down when pushed. I know nothing about Temple except that I’m a little frightened of one of the cooler names in the tournament: Dionte Christmas.

Pick: Arizona State

(3) Syracuse v. (14) Stephen F. Austin: Syracuse is a very good team that probably feels like it’s been screwed with its pants on by the selection committee for the last two years by being left out of the tournament. Because of that, it makes sense that this team is hungry to make its mark. Because they’ve played so many minutes in the tournament makes me a bit nervous, but they’re young guys and should be able to get up for the games. They are also bolstered by what I consider to be the second coolest name in the tournament: 1950s rock n’ roll sensation Jonny Flynn.

As for SFA, I remember they had a 6’5 230 plus, wide receiver in the NFL who played in the 90s. I can’t remember his name, but I remember him. He might have played for San Diego. I’ll track him down and update you later. I’m sure you’re dying to know.

Pick: Syracuse

(7) Clemson v. (10) Michigan: This is the third of three games that I couldn’t pick right away because I’ve come to learn never to trust Clemson, but I don’t believe in Michigan. I like neither of these teams. However, Clemson beat the living hell out of Duke and I’ve got to respect that.

Pick: Clemson

(2) Oklahoma v. (15) Morgan State: If Blake Griffin is truly healthy, then this team should go pretty far, but as I describe below, I probably artificially inflate teams like Oklahoma.

Pick: Oklahoma

Overall Predictions:

Sweet Sixteen

(1) Louisville
(12) Arizona
(6) West Virginia
(2) Michigan State
(1) Connecticut
(4) Washington
(3) Missouri
(2) Memphis
(1) Pittsburgh
(4) Xavier
(3) Villanova
(2) Duke
(1) North Carolina
(4) Gonzaga
(6) Arizona State
(2) Oklahoma

Great Eight

(1) Louisville
(2) Michigan State
(1) Connecticut
(2) Memphis
(1) Pittsburgh
(3) Villanova
(1) North Carolina
(2) Oklahoma

Final Four

(1) Louisville
(2) Memphis
(1) Pittsburgh
(2) Oklahoma

Championship Game

Pittsburgh over Memphis

I’m not the least bit confident that this is what’s going to happen and I'm not happy with my choices. I hate when this happens. It’s not like I’m going to wager much on this thing, but I’d still like to feel a little better about things. I could say that this year is just a crapshoot and it’s impossible to pick because the teams are so evenly matched. I could say that and maybe that would be true. But the reason I don’t feel comfortable or confident is because I haven’t seen enough of these teams play. I don’t like putting Memphis in the Championship Game or even the Final Four, but I don’t trust Louisville at all. I can easily see Michigan State coming out of that region. Hell, UW could come out of their region, but they could also lose in the first or second round. I feel like I’m trying to put together some IKEA furniture here where I can line something up and think it’s right, then force it into place and split the whole damn thing in half.

Earlier this year I thought for sure that Gonzaga was a Final Four team. They really looked like they had all of the pieces, but then I saw the Portland State game and saw what Memphis did to them, (both games at home! Although the Memphis game wasn’t on campus, but still, it was in Spokane), and I just don’t trust them.

I run into trouble with the tournament and predicting other sporting events as well because my familiarity with a team is my curse. If I know a team and don’t see many flaws, I’ll pick them to advance or have great seasons. I did this with the 2008 Seahawks. If I know a team and like them, but have reservations, I’ll handicap them more severely. I’m currently doing this to UW and Gonzaga in this tournament. Granted, I have both of these teams going to the Sweet Sixteen, but they’re both probably capable of more than that.

An alternate version to this happens when I am not that familiar with a team, or dangerously “sort of” familiar with a team. I have Oklahoma going to the Final Four. I know next to nothing about them except that Blake Griffin looks like he is a strong candidate to be a Nougat All Star as soon as next year. At the same time, I completely dismiss high-seeded teams that I’m unfamiliar with, such as Illinois and Florida State.

The bottom line is that I have no idea what I’m talking about, but I like to talk it through anyway.

Initial March Madness Thoughts - Part I

2009-03-16T21:18:00.000-07:00

Here are my initial thoughts on the bracket and my knee-jerk reaction picks before researching the teams and matchups more closely. I typically revise my bracket too many times before actually submitting and then, like everyone else I’m sure, immediately regret picking one team to go to far and kicking a different team out too early. This is why I’ve won only one pool in 17 years.

MIDWEST
(1) Louisville v. (16) Play-in Game Winner: If a 16 ever beats a 1, I really hope it’s the play-in winner because it will destroy brackets, especially if the 16 keeps advancing. Any neutral fan who does not have a heart of darkness would be pulling for the 16 to advance in each round. Disney wouldn’t even do this movie because they would find it too sappy and unbelievable for Moorehead State or Alabama State to advance to the Final Four. Also, it’s pretty weak to have a field of 65. Imagine if you played for either one of these school and you’re all excited to be in the tournament and then you watch on Selection Sunday and you’re the goddamn play-in game. It’s like being told you picked the right numbers for the lottery, but you have to play rock-papers-scissors to actually collect the cash. It’s bogus. Just go back to 64 and leave an undeserving team from a bigger conference sit the hell out. Those teams don’t need more chances because they’ve been given all the chances in the world; they just lost too many games. And yes, even as a Pac 10 apologist, I’m looking right at you Arizona, don’t look away from me.

That said Louisville is a pretty damn good team. I like their tenacity on defense and they can fill it up. They need Terrance Williams to continue playing like he has been. I’m hoping for a few holy-crap plays from him. I’d like to see him do his between the legs dunk in a game. I’m sure Pitino would love that. Also, I’d like to request that Pitino sport that ghastly white suit for at least one tourney game, but instead wear a red shirt and no tie so he can look exactly like Tony Montana.

I remember that during last year’s tournament, analysts were saying that Earl Clark was the best NBA prospect on the team and I couldn’t understand it. He’s a big guy who looks very athletic, but he seemed to me like he was completely lost on the court and had no idea what he was doing. He’s gotten better this year, but I don’t really like him as an NBA prospect.

Williams, on the other hand looks like he knows exactly what he should be doing at all times, except, of course, when he decides to shoot threes, of which he makes around 30 percent. Here’s a tip: if you’re only going to make three out of 10 shots from beyond the arc, from the COLLEGE stripe, I think you ought to stop shooting them with such regularity. I think he needs a shot doctor because he has a decent-looking stroke, but probably shoots it from all kinds of different heights because he jumps so damn high. One other thing, watch him run when he doesn’t have the ball. He looks like he’s wearing house slippers and shuffles in a way that suggests that if he doesn’t run that way, the slippers will come flying off. Chris Webber used to run this way. But it’s not as if he’s not athletic, he’s actually on the opposite end of that spectrum. The guy can dunk with his face if he wanted to. He’s one of those dudes who pretends to be a certain way because it looks cool or something. I didn’t get it until I confirmed that he is definitely a weird guy when I read Luke Winn’s SI article about him the other day. The gist of the article is that Williams is under the radar screen and that he’s another talented “point forward.” It was a good article and I enjoyed the brief history lesson on the position, but a few things struck me as “curious” about Williams. (1) he used to wear a Barbie backpack in high school, “just to be different,” (2) he’d wear Barney, Big Bird, and Spongebob Square Pants socks to practice, and (3) he was part of a “mean guy” group in high school, he told Winn that “we’d do stuff like come up to you in the cafeteria, knock your sandwich out of your hand and say, ‘You've gotta come strong to your mouth!’” Those are three very weird things filled with innuendo and I’m sure he’s grown out of some of them, if indeed growing out of certain things is possible to do. But if I was him, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be regaling an interviewer from SI about what a colossal dick I was to kids in high school. He looked the same as he does now as he did in high school. He might be a little bigger now at 220, but he was still 6’6 and at least 205. He sounds like a prototypical bully in an ‘80s comedy (movies, not the “Cosby Show”), if Hollywood actually comedies about teenage black kids in the ‘80s. Anyway, I love his game (except the shot).

Pick: Louisville

(8) Ohio State v. (9) Siena: This will be the first of many times that you’ll see me write this: I hate Big 10 Basketball. Normally I dislike broad, sweeping generalizations, but the style of play in that conference is nearly unwatchable at times. There are anomalies, such as that Illinois team lead by the three-guard attack of Deron Williams, Luther Head, and Dee Brown. They were exciting to watch because they pushed the action and were great shooters. My biggest beef is the dearth of scoring in the Big 10. Some of it is great defense, some of it is the conference’s complete lack of scoring ability. Evan Turner (of Club Trillion fame) led the Big 10 in scoring at 17.3. That’s gross and it’s indicative of what the Big 10 is capable of doing. I like my college hoops with scores hovering in the 70s and 80s. Take those games in the 50s and 60s games and seal them up with the Brylcreem and rampant racism.

Pick: Siena

(5) Utah v. (12) Arizona: My first thought then I saw Arizona in the field was, “That sucks for St. Mary’s.” A friend of mine went to school there and I’m sure he’s pissed that the Gaels are in the field. If Patty Mills didn’t get hurt they would be in without question because they probably would have beaten Gonzaga twice. As it is, he got hurt, St. Mary’s lost some games. The funny thing is, Arizona didn’t lose anyone and still lost games, yet here they are. Jordan Hill is a fantastic post player. Nic Wise is a decent PG and Chase Budinger is a hard guy to figure out, but I know that he can get deep-fryer hot and is explosive as hell. They don’t have many guys that play for them so if any of those guys rack up any fouls the only depth they will have is trouble. As for Utah, I know absolutely nothing about them, but I do know that they no longer have the tripled-umlauted wonder, Hanno Mottola, on their squad anymore. Too bad.

Quick tangent here, when I think of the University of Utah, I think back to a friend of mine who said that Utah is full of gorgeous women, nearly 90 percent of which are Mormon, and I wonder, is if fun to go to school there? I went to Pacific Lutheran University in Parkland, WA, and there were some really, really, really straight-laced people there, but I’d guess that they made up about half of the school’s population. Plus, we had beer with a full complement of alcohol content by volume. In Utah, their beer, by state law, has less alcohol content than normal. I don’t really have a point here at all, I just wanted to share what I think of when I think of Utah. Hot women, O’Doul’s-level beer, and religious tolerance.

The other thing that I think about is Andrew Bogut. I realize he was the first pick in the NBA draft a few years ago and sure, he’s a decent center with some nice ability, but I can’t picture him without thinking that he looks like a really ugly woman. He looks more like a woman than a man to me, even though he’d make a highly unattractive woman if that makes sense (I’m sure it doesn’t), not just because he’s 7’0 tall either because, as the photos prior to the Summer Games in Sydney proved, a freakishly tall woman (Lauren Jackson) can look quite fetching without any gear on.

Pick: Arizona

(4) Wake Forrest v. (13) Cleveland State: Wake has some great young players and was smokin’ hot early in the season. I actually kind of like their draw, they’ve got a really good chance to get to the Final Four, but they are one of those teams that I’ll probably pick to advance too far and they’ll burn me. Their youth is at the guard spot which is really dangerous in the tournament, but I do like their squad. I remember when UW played Cleveland State, but I didn’t see any of the game. I don’t recall if it was on TV or not, but I suspect that it wasn’t. I’ll be pulling for this team if for no other reason than the sweetness of this guy’s name: J'Nathan Bullock.

Pick: Wake

(6) West Virginia v. (11) Dayton: I haven’t seen Dayton play, but I did catch West Virginia play Louisville on March 7. They look like a pretty tough team and I’m hoping Bog Huggins busts out the sweet mock-turtleneck-no-sport-coat look for this game.

Pick: West Virginia

(3) Kansas v. (14) North Dakota State: Kansas pink-bellied UW early this year and made me think two things at the time: (1) Wow. UW cannot score and is not a tournament team, and (2) Kansas looks very good and the Cole Aldrich that we saw in limited doses during last year’s run is truly a nice player. I overreacted with my first thought, which is often the case, but my second thought is bearing out. Aldrich is a very nice player who isn’t the least bit stiff as his stature suggests that he is. I’m being insensitive here, but he looks like a big, slow, white guy and he’s big and white, but not necessarily slow, and he’s skilled. Kansas looks pretty tough to me still and a second round game of Kansas v. West Virginia looks promising. That said I’m fully rooting for North Dakota State to pull the upset. What’s not to like about a team that is in its first year of DI post-season eligibility that won its conference tournament on a play by their best player. The team can shoot the lights out and a team like that is very dangerous.

Pick: Kansas

(7) Boston College v. (10 USC): Truly a neutral floor for both teams. I doubt that anyone who went to USC decided that they liked the sun so much that they decided to move to Minneapolis. It’s more likely that BC alums live there because of the similar weather conditions. However, geographically speaking there is no advantage to either team in terms of travel. I haven’t seen BC play this year and can’t speak intelligently about them so I won’t, but I have seen USC play on several occasions and they are a difficult team to figure out. Throughout the year, they looked like a tournament team to me, but their record did not suggest it. They have very strong guard play out of Daniel Hackett and Dwight Lewis (who are both 6’5) and DeMar DeRozan is a freshman that I’ve been jocking for the entire season. I love his game and his ability. He’s turning it on at the right time as well (or maybe Tim Floyd is letting him play a little more freely now) as evidenced by his 21 and 13 game against UCLA he had in the Pac 10 tournament. Also, not sure if you saw this but he had a ferocious dunk in that same game where he stole the ball, passed it ahead, got it back and took off outside of the key, and nearly dunked the ball through the floor. It was incredible. I’m glad to see that they made it in the tournament because I think that they will make some serious noise.

Pick: USC

(2) Michigan State v. (15) Robert Morris: I have nothing to say about this game except that I don’t care and I hope it’s not a featured game on CBS anytime I’m in the vicinity of a TV.

Pick: Michigan State

WEST
(1) Connecticut v. (16) Chattanooga: I’m bummed Chattanooga bounced Steph Curry from the Tournament, I was looking forward to him lighting it up again. As for UCONN, they’re a very tough matchup because of their physical nature and talented guard play. They seem like a lock to make the Final Four.

Pick: Connecticut

(8) BYU v. (9) Texas A&M: Ugh. I echo my sentiments from the Michigan State game above. I might even turn off the TV if subjected to this game.

Pick: A & M, but who really cares? I picked BYU to go to the Sweet Sixteen when they had Rafael Araujo and they got chased home in the first round. Plus I hate all things BYU (with the exception of Steve Sarkisian, of course).

(5) Purdue v. (12) Northern Iowa: The Big 10 again… how in the world did they get seven teams in? I haven’t seen either of these teams, and my inclination to pick against the Big 10 based solely on hate is not very reasoned, so I guess I’ll side with Purdue if for no other reason than these two names on their roster, which I can only assume are very common names in Indiana: E'Twaun Moore, JaJuan Johnson. How can I argue with that?

Pick: Purdue

(4) Washington v. (13) Mississippi State: I both love and hate the way UW has been playing this year, but I can’t argue with the results. I love their ability to shoot the three (I should say Dentmon’s ability to do so and Thomas’s ability to occasionally do so). I love their defensive effort especially out of Overton and the two lanky fellows (Gant and Holiday). I love Pondexter’s realization that in order to be good, he’s got to be aggressive and put forth a ton of effort. I love Brockman’s ability to play like he’s made of boulders and Brillo pads and nab rebounds. I love Thomas’s strength, moxie, talent, and capability to make the right decisions as a freshman. I love the team’s heart and desire to storm back into games that they’re losing or to extend leads in games they are winning.

I hate the way that they don’t value possessions as much as they should be being too casual with the ball (on passes etc). I hate Brockman’s inability to score inside (exacerbated against this team with a dude who blocks everything thrown his way). I hate that I don’t trust anyone but Thomas and Dentmon to shoot a three. I hate their size at the guard position. I hate that Bryan-Amaning insists on missing two-foot shots.

I’m anxious for this game and I’m scared to talk about something that has been huge for them this year because it’s a highly jinxable topic. I’ll just say this, they are markedly better at one “thing” this year than they were at that “thing” last year when they were the worst team in the country doing that “thing.” I think that’s helped a lot. There, I think we’re ok…

I listened to a guy who covers Mississippi State this morning on KJR’s Mitch in the Morning show as I came in to work today and he described a team that is on a roll and that plays fast, plays aggressively, and have a great shot blocker. In other words, the same team that UW has without the shot blocker. A few months ago I said that MSU is the type of team that I wanted UW to play. I didn’t want them to go up against a team that was very disciplined and patient that had a big size advantage. They seem to have some bigger guards than UW, but who doesn’t?

I trust what I’ve seen in UW all year (even if I’m cursing at them each game and telling Brockman to stop trying to face up and do your crappy spin move in the post to charge into someone and pick up a stupid foul) and they seem like a team that is resilient enough to pull this game out and if they do, I don’t sweat Purdue or Northern Iowa in round 2.

Pick: Washington

(6) Marquette v. (11) Utah State: It’s a shame that Marquette lost Dominic James because their guard-oriented lineup was pretty great. I don’t know much about Utah State except that they are the third team from Utah in the tournament. Also, since they are from Utah it means that they’ll have the advantage of being more sober than a team from Wisconsin.

Pick: Marquette

(3) Missouri v. (14) Cornell: I’m really hoping that Missouri advances two rounds so that they get a chance to face Memphis (should they also advance). That game could rival the UW v. UAB game a few years ago. Mike Anderson (former UAB coach) has Missouri playing the same way his UAB squads played. Insane pace, pressing on D, athletic dudes running all over the place. I’m excited to see what this team can do and also what Anderson can do at a bigger conference where he can get more talented guys to run his game. I almost feel badly for Cornell. Almost.

Because I’m a big advocate of the power of names, I ask you this: how in the world do you stop Missouri’s Leo Lyons? This guy has double king of the jungle momentum going for him, plus he’s got the added benefit of being a Missouri Tiger. That’s a triple shot of big cat action.

Also, since we’re talking about Missouri, this is a good time and the perfect venue for me to mention that I’ve said for years that former Missouri forward, Doug Smith looks exactly like Big Daddy Kane.

Pick: Missouri

(7) California v. (10) Maryland: Cal is a tough team and evidently Mike Montgomery is a good college coach, but a horrid NBA coach, except that doesn’t matter anymore. It’s pretty clear he’ll stay in the college ranks where he belongs. I don’t know much about his team, and I don’t know anything about Maryland except that they got absolutely spanked a few times this year, which tells me that they have the propensity to lie down and die if they’re out of it.

Pick: California

(2) Memphis v. (15) Cal State Northridge: I saw Memphis just pants Gonzaga this year in Spokane. It was such a bad matchup for Gonzaga because of Memphis’s ridiculous athleticism. I like Tyreke Evans quite a bit. This looks like a very viable Final Four team. I was pissed that they lost to Kansas last year because I loved Derrick Rose, but he played very passively in the first half of that game. I don’t see the same kind of passivity in Evans, but he’s not the talent Rose was either…

Pick: Memphis

Tomorrow: East and South knee-jerk predictions

Sonics Venting

2009-03-15T12:19:00.000-07:00

Without looking at the standings, I have no idea what the Sonics’s record is. I’ve decided to continue calling them this even if they’re no longer here. It’s either that or call them the Symbols. Sort of like when Prince changed his name to an unpronounceable symbol, he was referred to as “The Artist Formerly Known as Prince.” Rather than being verbose and calling them “The Team Formerly Known as the Sonics,” I could go with the brevity of Symbols, but that’s petty, so I’ll just call them the Sonics and leave it at that.

I do know that several teams in the NBA are positioning themselves for the playoffs and that the Sonics are not going to be included. However, it doesn’t give me any joy to know that they aren’t positioned for success right now because it still kills me that they left. Not just that the team left, which completely blows, but rather that this particular team isn’t here anymore. I loved the way that they were and are putting the team together.

I couldn’t stand the sports purgatory that they were in after the Kemp/GP years. If a team doesn’t have the pieces in place to make a serious push for championship contention, then it has to make drastic changes and blow it up. Paying high salaries to players who have no realistic chance of leading the team to serious playoff contention makes as much sense as a short-order cook using all of his money to lease a Lexus. It initially looks flashy, but is ultimately unsatisfying and is a colossal mistake that will take years to recover from.

The Sonics had their Lexus for a few years during the Ray Allen/Rashard Lewis days. They shot the hell out of the ball and it was fun watching that for awhile, but there was no way that team was going anywhere beyond the first or second round of the playoffs. That’s not terrible, but I’d rather not have a team that has an absolute ceiling like that. I couldn’t delude myself into thinking that those guys were ever going to make any serious playoff runs, and that removes an element of fun from the games for me. I’d care, and care a lot about their games, but I always knew that they just didn’t have the horses.

This leads me to my righteous anger and justifiable envy that I feel toward the Sonics.

I applauded the non-signing of Rashard Lewis (age 29), despite his milky jumper. As much as I liked Rashard, he was basically a taller version of Ray Allen (and his buttery jumper), but he was as apt to take his defender off the bounce and got to the rim as often as “The Dude” put in a hard days work at the office. Rashard was simply far too expensive for what he brought to the table. I like him as a third option on a good team. Maybe even a second option in a pinch, but the Sonics would have torpedoed their future if they gave him 6 years $118 million like the Magic did, which is more than Dwight Howard makes by the way. He’s a nice guy and a good teammate, but that’s silly money.

I will always like Ray Allen (age 33) and his buttery jumper, but he was not part of the long-term solution either and Seattle was wise to let him go, especially after they fell ass backwards lucky into the second pick (Kevin Durant, age 20). Nabbing the fifth pick (Jeff Green, age 22), Delonte West, Wally Szczerbiak, a number 2 was fantastic. Everyone loved Green and he’s going to be a good player.

If the Sonics kept Lewis, Allen, and Durant together they probably would have won anywhere from 45-49 games in the West—good enough to battle for an 8 seed, but probably out of the playoffs. The games would be exciting because that team could definitely compete night in and night out. Durant would have had a chance to grow and develop his game under two established stars and would have no pressure to be the man right away. The team would absolutely shoot the lights out and would easily lead the league in threes attempted and made, by over 100. But to have that team together would never be better than an 8 seed and probably would never get out of the first round of the playoffs, not with the West as strong as it is right now. Also, as noted above, it would have been a crazy expensive team. While Ray Allen and Rashard Lewis are really good guys and have no weird jerk-like tendencies, I think that they would have stifled Durant’s growth as a go-to guy and a leader. The Sonics, as presently constructed, are a team that will grow together and who knows that they’ll be good if they just give themselves time and it looks like the front office is giving them time.

By moving Allen and Lewis, the Sonics shed 20 years and over $14 million per year in salaries for two players who are better positioned (because they’re younger and have complementary skills instead of duplicative skills) to turn their team into contenders. It worked out great for Boston since they won a title with Allen. It’s working out great for Orlando because they now look like a perennial playoff team, but both of those teams were in different positions than Seattle. Boston had Paul Peirce and was gunning for KG, and Orlando already had Dwight Howard, Jameer Nelson, and Hedo Turkoglu.

Thanks to USA Today’s NBA Salary Database, which keeps tabs on player salaries, we see that the Sonics get to cut loose Chucky Atkins, Malik Rose, Desmond Mason, and Robert Swift at the end of the year if they want to in order to lure free agents that could help them win soon, of course convincing these players to live in the dustbowl is going to be difficult. We haven’t seen them do so yet. Also, their best players are signed to rookie-minimum deals through the 2010-11 season. They are a team positioned to do big things because KD is the real deal. He’s as talented as anyone in the NBA, he’s got a killer instinct, and he seems like a good dude whose teammates love him. I like everything about this team with the small exception that they were stolen from Seattle. Also, that weird Tyson Chandler thing has me baffled. I know that he would have cost some cash, but he’s a guy that I don’t mind paying money to because he’s actually a supremely talented defensive center who doesn’t complain about anything. He’s not a scorer, but he would have been on a team of scorers. Weird deal, that whole non-transaction.

Sonics Roster & Salaries
Chucky Atkins – 2yrs/$6,600,000, signed through 2008-09 (t)
Nick Collison – 4yrs/$26,000,000, signed through 2010-11
Kevin Durant –5yrs/$21,352,150, signed through 2010-11 (t)
Jeff Green – 5yrs/$15,768,441, signed through 2010-11
Nenad Krstic – 3yrs/$15,600,000, signed through 2010-11
Desmond Mason – 2yrs/$11,000,000, signed through 2008-09
Malik Rose – 7yrs/$42,000,000, signed through 2007-08 (p)
Thabo Sefolosha – 4yrs/$8,180,000, signed through 2009-10 (t)
Robert Swift – 4yrs/$7,895,000, signed through 2007-08 (t)
Earl Watson – 5yrs/$29,000,000, signed through 2009-10
Kyle Weaver – 4yrs/$3,612,904, signed through 2011-12
Russell Westbrook – 5yrs/$23,053,162, signed through 2012-13
D.J. White – 5yrs/$8,112,118, signed through 2012-13
Damien Wilkins – 5yrs/$15,000,000, signed through 2009-10 (p)

I’m not really sure why I bothered to do this other than to torture myself. I could have accomplished the same result by sticking clothes pins on my nipples. I just really liked that team and I like what they’re doing and I’m lamenting the fact that they’re not here. I, like many others, am pissed at everyone involved in the transaction. It’s baffling to me that some people say things like “I can’t blame Clay Bennett because he wanted an NBA team and one was for sale, so he bought it.” Well, I can’t parse my anger quite so easily. My anger knows no bounds and will not be constrained. I’m pissed at him for existing. If it wasn’t for him, they wouldn’t be in the dustbowl. They’d be here (in the snow, as it turns out, in f’ing mid-MARCH). He lied like a whore on his back. He tried to convince people that he wanted the team to remain here, sounding as genuine as mortgage broker. I hate him. I hope he and his cronies continue to lose money in the energy market and are forced to sell the team, even though I’m sure that they won’t sell to anyone back here.

I hold a special place of hate in my heart for Howard Schultz who is the worst bastard around. He sold the team because he didn’t have the stones or real power to stand up to his ownership group and tell them to ride it out to wait for a local buyer to emerge. Schultz loved the limelight. He loved being the “owner” of the team even though there were several other wealthy dudes who owned the team. He loved pumping his fist from his courtside seat, but when we really needed him to be a responsible owner, to be a steward for the community, he sold to out-of-town ownership. He owns the lion’s share of the blame and of course I hate him. But I don’t discriminate, mine is not a jealous hate. It has many partners. Two others are invited to drink my haterade: the Washington State Legislature and the City of Seattle, specifically Greg Nickels. They’re inability to re-do the lease on Key Arena (City of Seattle) and the inability to extend taxes to pay for a new arena make me want take a pitching wedge to their heads.

Of course, I can't leave out NBA Commissioner David Stern. His arrogance and overall demeanor when he spoke of the Seattle market seriously made me consider commissioning a rhino to commit sodomy on him. People would bring up Seattle's reach to the Pacific Rim and he's dismissively say that they have much closer reach because they actually have offices in China. Because that's the same as an actual NBA team. I seethed everytime I heard him speak. I don't know why I put myself through it because I knew that he'd say something to piss me off but I kept listening anyway. What's wrong with me?

Ok, now that’s off of my chest. I suppose I can watch the NBA playoffs now and root for random things so that I can squeeze some semblance of joy out of a sport that I’ve followed for years. I’ll pull for guys with Puget Sound ties to make some noise in the playoffs. Hopefully Brandon Roy (Garfield HS, UW) will become a force this postseason. I’m going to watch Atlanta play if Marvin Williams (Bremerton HS) can return from injury because he was having a decent season before getting hurt. I’m very interested to see if Nate Robinson (Rainier Beach HS, UW) can continue his torrid pace and lead the Knicks to the playoffs. Aaron Brooks (Franklin HS) is getting a lot of burn since Skip was traded to Orlando and is positioned to do some good things. Rodney Stuckey (Kentwood HS, Eastern WA) is playing reasonably well and Detroit is in no real danger of falling out of the playoffs.

Sigh. I know it’s pathetic, but it’s all I’ve got, NBA-wise. Luckily, another local guy (Rainer Beach’s Terrance Williams) will be making his way to the NBA off of a stellar senior season at Louisville.

At least I have March Madness to look forward to and selection Sunday, only three short hours away.

Does This Story Make Me Look Fat?

2009-03-14T09:30:00.001-07:00

The other day, I was listening to Dan Patrick’s podcast and he was talking about breaking some exclusive news story that LeBron James was going to be on an “Entourage” episode with Tom Brady. I thought that it was mildly interesting, but since it’s not uncommon for athletes to have cameo appearances in TV shows or movies I didn’t think much of it. Then he went on a sort of tongue-in-cheek farcical tangent, asking if anyone had called about his breaking news, or as he calls it, “spraining news.” As if being the first to say something meant more than the actual event itself (e.g. LeBron appearing on “Entourage”). That got me thinking, does it really matter to anyone outside of the media industry who breaks the news? Because once the story, whatever the story may be, is “out” then all news outlets will cover it and cover it ad naseum. I understand that information guys (news, sports, entertainment or otherwise) need to constantly be searching for fresh stories and breaking news in order to prove their worth to continually to keep their network, newspaper (crossing self, pouring out liquor), or website relevant. But to the consumers of that information, whoever “broke” the story couldn’t be more irrelevant. Who cares?

In a way, the media is analogous to women. What I mean by that is in my years knowing women and being married for awhile now, it’s clear that when women get dressed up and want to look their best, they are not doing so for their husband, boyfriend, date etc. They are dressing up for other women. Sure, their husband, boyfriend, date etc. think that they look good (that is if they do in fact look good, as we know, that’s not always the case), but that’s a byproduct. The intent is to secure the “those shoes are so cute” comment from other women. This will never change. Women want to look good for self-esteem purposes, but the overriding motivation is that they want to look good for other women.

The media and specific media members want to look good for other media members. They want to be known as the reporter that got the scoop on whatever story is big that day, such as Selena Roberts breaking the Alex Rodriguez uses steroids story. It looks good for that reporter to land that story. Some non-media people may remember who broke the story, but more likely than not the story is the story, not the person who broke the story. The only people who care about the “who” are those in the media, because we, as a reading, watching, and listening public only care about the information, not who is providing it.

As an aside, I think that the Alex Rodriguez situation is an honest-to-goodness story, worthy of all of the frothiness that it has caused. I do not think that Terrell Owens getting cut by Dallas and subsequently being signed by Buffalo is worthy of breaking news story. The big difference between the two is that the Rodriguez story may never have seen the light of day except for Roberts doing good investigative work. Time could have gone on and no one would have found out unless she unearthed the information. That is not the same thing as the Terrell Owens situation. As time winded down toward the start of the NFL season, we all would have found out if Terrell Owens was going to be with Dallas or be cut; Dallas would eventually let us know. There was no need for reporters to keep asking Jerry Jones the same question over and f’ing over again. Time solves this question. Same goes for the Buffalo angle. Time will tell us if he gets picked up by someone and when. There is no need to have a vigil. There is no need to “break” this story because Buffalo, like Dallas, would have announced it.

I understand that Terrell Owens is an intriguing story to some. He’s a talented player who is so unabashedly starved for attention and will constantly seek the limelight. I’m sure he wants to be remembered as a great player, and he will be, but he’ll always have his detractors because his bravado detracts from the actual plays he makes on the field. But I honestly wonder if he’s really as interesting as major media outlets make him out to be. Would we care if they didn’t report everything that he does? Do they carry this news because we demand it, or do we watch, read, listen to it because it’s pushed to us? There are 1,696 players on the 53-man roster of NFL teams. The NFL draft is around the corner. It’s amazing to me that one person can garner so much airtime without doing much to deserve it. If he retired tomorrow, who would really care? Well, I guess the good people of Buffalo would, but outside of that frozen hamlet, I really doubt that he’d be missed. Luckily for me and others like me, he’s nearing the end of his career and he’ll fade away very soon. Unless, of course, some network decides to follow him around with a camera on a show called “T & A with T.O.!” which stands for “time and access” and not the other, more intriguing usage of T &A, although I’d assume that would be part of the show as well. We’d get to see T.O. walking around L.A. getting into adventures and touching people’s lives, kind of like what Jules wanted to do. Or, more likely, we’d see him travel around the city with a pack of sycophantic types feeding him peeled grapes and telling him how hot he is.

Marko Jaric

2009-03-14T09:24:00.000-07:00

First, sexual assault is a cowardly, prison-rapeable offense. Second, I fully understand that these things can be a he-said, she-said thing. However, for a guy to step out, even if he’s just being flirtatious or whatever, on Adriana Lima is so unspeakably moronic that Memphis should be able to void Jaric’s contract for gross stupidity. There has got to be some kind of clause in his contract for that, right? Sort of like a morals clause, “Player’s contract shall be irrevocably voided if Player jeopardizes his relationship with his piping, habaneo-pepper hot Brazilian supermodel girlfriend/fiancé/wife by even looking lustily in the direction of a another human, animal, magazine or computer screen.” In other words, Jaric deserves to lose millions of dollars for screwing this up. He was in a stratosphere above his head anyway, or to use a word my friend, Jay, uses in these instances, he was “treeing.”

[Update] I just read here: that Jaric won't be charged, but as I said above, risking going from a Lima-existence to a non-Lima existence is moronic.

Byron Leftwich & Seahawks Generally

2009-03-14T09:22:00.000-07:00

Sign him, Seahawks. I don’t know what kind of offense they will run in Seattle, but I do think that if he’s willing to be a backup, then he’s certainly worth it. He’s a huge upgrade over Charlie Frye and Seneca Wallace. I do like Wallace, and he has played very well in Hasselbeck’s absence, but if Seattle has a chance to bring in a guy who could and should definitely be a starter in the NFL as a backup, I think they’ve got to do it. I’d feel very comfortable with a QB situation of Hasselbeck, Leftwich, and Wallace. I never felt comfortable with Charlie Frye.

I have an illogical belief that the Seahawks are going to be good next year. I say it just about every year because I convince myself that because I know their team and their players then it means that I can predict that they’ll be good. Forget the fact that every single one of their offensive line ended up on the injured reserve before the season was over. Forget the fact that every one of their wide receivers was injured during the season or coming off of an injury before the season. Forget the fact that their Pro-Bowl-caliber QB ended up sitting out nearly half of the season with a bulging disk in his back. Forget the fact that their defense was atrocious and could not get off of the field. I say forget all of that and focus on this one nugget: from a karma perspective, that conveyor belt of beaver traps can’t happen again to this team. It just can’t. The NFL gods were telling Holmgren that he should have left after 2007. No one ever stays with just one year left on their deal. As much of an awesome dude Holmgren is, and by all accounts he was, he still couldn’t get past the fact that he was a lame duck coach. Players do not want to be terrible, but when there is someone else to shoulder the blame, it makes things a little easier. Subconsciously it’s impossible for players (employees, essentially) not to let off the gas a little in imperceptible ways if the guy making decisions and riding these players is not going to be around. Just think about what it’s like when there are simply no consequences to what you do. Would you still work as hard as you had been if there were no penalties associated with your behavior?

Andre Smith

2009-03-14T09:20:00.000-07:00

This guy is taking a beating in media. However, no matter how terribly he’s performed in the days since he left Alabama’s program and declared for the draft, none of the negatives about him have anything to do with his ability to play football, which is what he’s going to be paid millions to do. Last we saw of Mr. Smith on the field, he was putting together a season that earned him the Outland Trophy, awarded to the best interior offensive or defensive lineman. Past winners include guys like Bruce Smith, Chad Hennings, Russell Maryland, Steve Emtman, Will Shields, Jonathan Ogden, Orlando Pace, Chris Samuels, John Henderon, Bryant McKinnie, Joe Thomas, and Glenn Dorsey. Those guys range from Hall of Famers to young players who may be great, but are in the very early stages of their NFL careers. Some guys who also won it recently and who have not played up their potential include Rien Long, Robert Gallery, and Jammal Brown. Notice how I snuck Steve Emtman in the first group? I have a soft spot for the guy since he is in the conversation for the best defensive player in modern college football history. He was an incredible beast and wore a half shirt as a 290 lb white dude. You have to respect that—or respect the ‘roids, whichever.

My point is that everyone needs to remember that the NFL draft and the NFL, generally, is all about misinformation. The people running NFL teams are not idiots. We may think so from time to time when teams like Detroit keep drafting wide receivers with their first pick or when teams like Washington pay exorbitant amounts of cash to free agents for very little return. But on the whole, NFL front office guys are acutely aware that every word they say around draft time will be scooped up by some media source and be dispersed within seconds. The fans demand it from the media because they are hungry for NFL news. The NFL teams know this so they use it to their advantage.

Even if a “scout” remains “anonymous” it doesn’t matter so long as the message gets out there. “We think Andre Smith is a horrible football player with a bad attitude” or “We won’t touch him, he’s not worth the trouble.” Two words for you: B and S. I don’t buy it. Not for a second. I understand that Andre Smith has cost himself a shot at being drafted high in the first round, but it’s not as if he’s not going to get a chance and that he’s not going to be a first-round pick and a multimillionaire. It’s ludicrous to think otherwise. During the season, when they were actually playing football, Andre Smith was being tabbed as possibly the number one pick in the draft. Number One. To even suggest that he’s fallen out of the first round or, as some people predict, out of the first day is patently ridiculous. He’s a hugely talented left tackle who dominated at Alabama, who, last I checked, was a pretty damn good football team, in a conference that is clearly the best in the country, and the number-one-ranked team late in the season. Everything that has happened to Smith since the SEC Championship Game against Florida has been negative. But again, none of what he did had one thing to do with him being able to play football.

Teams are starving for talented offensive tackles like Smith. He won’t be the first pick in the draft, but he will go in the first round. That’s a guarantee. He’s too talented and teams need his ability. It’s been written many times that teams factor in “character” when considering who to bring in to their franchise, but remember that teams will always, always, always choose talent over character because they believe that with the right system, the player will behave for them and be successful. There is a laundry list of guys who you wouldn’t want bagging your groceries let alone paying millions of dollars to. For every Adam “Pacman” Jones and Odell Thurman, who may be completely ostracized from the NFL by now, there are several players who have been given numerous chances despite their reprehensible behavior and remain employed by NFL teams. An admittedly non-comprehensive list: Larry Johnson (woman beater), Marshawn Lynch (hit-and-runner), Chris Henry (a string of DUIs and assaults), Matt Jones (cocaine possession… I didn’t know people still did cocaine, I thought that went out with pegged pants, feathered hair, and sport coats with rolled-up sleeves), Jerramy Stevens (drunk-driving menace), Bryant McKinnie (felony battery), Gosder Cherilus (bar brawler), Cedric Benson (DUI and BUI), Marvin Harrison (gun issues), Tank Johnson (gun issues), Jared Allen (three DUIs), Charles Grant (involuntary manslaughter involving a pregnant woman), Rocky Bernard (domestic violence), James Harrison (domestic violence), Plaxico Burress (general idiocy, shooting self in night club), Koren Robinson (multiple DUIs), Ricky Manning Jr. (felony assault), and the Patron Saint of Horrible Humans, Drunk Driving, Mother Killing, Leonard Little.

While Andre Smith seems to not have a good grasp on putting forth a professional appearance, he has not been in any legal trouble that I’ve seen. Perhaps he shows bad judgment that may lead to legal troubles down the line, but do people really think that NFL teams are going to collectively teach guys like Andre Smith a lesson by not drafting him? They’d be fools to do that. If an NFL team thinks that he’s a good player, then they are going to draft him and pay him money to play football. If he’s good at that, he’ll last in the league a very long time. If he’s not good, he’ll be cut, whether he’s a “good guy” or “bad guy,” it doesn’t matter. If he can play, he’ll get paid, and that’s that.

Super Bowl, SEC, Opel - February 4, 2009

2009-03-05T21:13:00.000-08:00

Biggest Winner
The Super Bowl. I really didn’t want this to happen. I guess that it doesn’t bother me all that much, but it is annoying that Pittsburgh gets the victory again. However, that pass and catch to OSU’s own Santonio Holmes was fantastic. When Roethlisberger let it go I thought it was sailing way out of the endzone, it just seemed too high and Holmes just snatched it. I stand by my pre-Super Bowl evaluation of Roethlisberger, but he was much more efficient on that day than he normally is (he doesn’t regularly put up a 70% completion rate). He did everything that he’s good at in that game. The scrambling thing helps him tremendously because that allows his players to get open and he’s accurate enough to get the ball to them on 3rd down and that’s really frustrating. He’s a really good QB now, had a near perfect day in the Super Bowl and it just pisses me off. I’d still, stubbornly, leave him curbside though on Mondays along with my grass clippings.

Fitzgerald is a phenomenal. I love watching him play. Related to that, I’m looking forward to the day when we can choose which camera angles we want to watch during games, a la Madden. I, like you, and probably everyone who was watching the game who had a passable knowledge of the teams, was wondering why Fitzgerald wasn’t getting the ball. We can make assumptions during the game, e.g. “He must be double-covered,” but we don’t know. I’d love to be able to see the overhead shots or what they call the “coaches’ tape” to see just what in the hell was going on. Even if he was double covered I would have forced it to him. The guy makes plays all of the time. That catch and run he had was amazing, as you said. When he caught it I stood up and started high stepping in place like Deion Sanders. I want to see Andre Johnson from Houston play some next year so I can truly compare the two players because lots of people say that he’s just as good as Fitzgerald. I’m dubious, but I’m also willing to be convinced. I just don’t see how anyone is as good as him and there is no chance that anyone is actually better than he is.

Hey, how about my “bonus prediction” that one of Pitt’s TDs would be a return? While I didn’t anticipate seeing a 242 lb James Harrison steamrolling down the sidelines for 100 yards, I did think that Pitt would definitely score on defense or special teams. I actually thought that an interception would be returned. I agree totally with your assessment, Mowrer, that guys sort of gave up on the play before it was over. I thought that the dudes that were in the back simply thought that there was no way he was going to make it 100 yards without someone stopping him. I’ve only watched it live and then when they were showing the replays during the official’s review, but I noticed that Fitzgerald, who ended up catching him, actually slowed down quite a bit when he was toward the back of the crowd, but then sped up (a lot) to run his big ass down just a step too late. What a remarkable play though, it really is a game of inches and there were several plays like that (well, not exactly like that) in the game.

Another thing about this game that I found compelling was that my friend Joel and I said, at least three times during the game, that it was over, Pittsburgh had it wrapped up. But then they kept letting Arizona back into the game and Arizona made huge plays. I can’t believe they came back to take the lead and nearly won the damn thing if not for some abysmal play in the Arizona secondary leading to the Holmes TD. That play where Francisco (no. 47) slipped and allowed Holmes to sprint down to the 6 was a killer, there is no way that should happen at that time in the game. Great game though and it’s pretty cool that we’ve had two very, very good Super Bowls back-to-back.

Biggest Loser
Michael Phelps. I don’t care that he smokes pot. In fact, I couldn’t care less. It’s a non-story for me, but if he loses millions in endorsement deals because he got caught blazin’, in a semi-public place, at a frat house in South Carolina, then dude, you are just stupid. He can burn at home and no one would know. He could burn after the London Olympics, in public, in Heathrow and it wouldn’t matter because no one will care about him anymore. I’m sure this will blow over, but it’s just one more thing to have to deal with and he’s not exactly going to continue to have huge earning potential because he has no other talent than swimming, which is exactly one more talent than I have, which, last I looked, is nothing. Michael, stay away from the bong water and stick to the water in the pool, you’ll be better off.

Bonus Losers
Steve Sarkisian and Nick Holt for their stupid “secondary violations.” Dudes, KNOCK IT OFF.

The SEC Continues to Deliver
As we’ve discussed in this space before, it is a long-held belief (at least four months or so) that the SEC’s dominance in football is directly correlated to the patented awesomeness of the players’ names. Rest assured that the SEC’s dominance will continue because one recruit sought after by two SEC West powers (Alabama and LSU) is a linebacker from West Monroe, Louisiana named Barkevious Mingo. It’s nice to see that two teams in the SEC are taking their legacy seriously. I only hope and pray for the SEC that his Barkevious isn’t stronger than his Bitevious.

My '79 Buick Opel
When I was a junior in college I worked at a sporting goods store that is now defunct (Olympic Sports). One night after work I agreed to drive my friend, Mike, home. He was getting his car worked on or something. Anyway, he lived in Puyallup so I dropped him off and when I was on my way home, my car died. I was able to pull over next to a phone booth (I can’t believe how dated this story got… no, I didn’t have a cell phone, this was 1995) and called my roommates to come and get me. As I sat in the car waiting, I realized that I better gather up anything “important” to me in the car just in case someone broke into it. I had speakers mounted in wood boxes behind the back seat of the car. This car was worth maybe $250, but yet I had speakers mounted in the back—of course the speakers were crappy, so I guess it all made sense.

I climbed into the backseat to remove the speakers, but they were nailed in really well. I was leaning with my chest and stomach against the seat with the back of my head pressed against the rear windshield while grabbing one speaker box pulling up as hard as possible when… BAP. Everything went dark. I woke up on my back, cradling the speaker box in my arms. I had knocked myself out. My teeth and forehead were aching. When I pulled the box out, I had smacked my forehead with the corner of the box and my teeth smacked together, knocking me out. I have no idea how long I’d been out (probably not long) but I had a huge, Looney-Toons-like bump on my forehead. When my roommates showed up I got out of the car and pointed to my forehead. They thought I’d been mugged. I told them what happened and they laughed for a very long time at me.

The next day, we were walking home from class and my car was parked in our driveway. There was no note and no explanation. My roommate, Brian, looked at me and called the car “Christine.” Evidently, Mike, the guy I drove home the night before, saw my car parked along the side of the road and towed it to my house, but didn’t bother telling me until I saw him at work the next week. The car never worked again (pouring out liquor…).